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Mikesymommy profile image
15 Replies

My 7 year old son got diagnosed last fall with adhd. I wasn't surprised as i noticed there was just something always "more" about his behaviors especially as he grew older and didn't outgrow them. It wasn't a huge problem at school til a month or so into first grade. At home, and the reason our therapist originally gave us the diagnosis, was me having a baby last spring. His impulse control is zero. Constantly and i mean constantly touching, pushing, fixated on her. Any opportunity he gets he's on her and usually ends up with her getting hurt. In no way is it mean spirited just too rough and not understanding. We had the same problem with pets in past and don't have any currently. He is now medicated and we are trying different ones out. The hardest part for me is he is becoming the disturbance. We had baseball tryouts today. He's poking, hitting, being a goof and people are staring. I feel bad for him, for me, like i feel like as he's getting older and stronger and faster i can no longer control the situations that happen.

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Mikesymommy
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15 Replies
Faith2myboi profile image
Faith2myboi

Hi... I'm new on here as well and my son was just diagnosed 3 weeks ago. My husband and I had a good idea of what was going on with him but for me as his mom I really did not want to face it and that's because this would not be my very first time dealing with a child who has ADHD I have an older son who is now 30 and we went through a lot with him but we managed and we made it and he's a wonderful young man with a great job and decent friends. There is a difference between my two boys my younger boy is totally different I'm exhausted everyday by the time its time for me to get in bed I'm an older parent my husband and I so we didn't expect to have another child but God blessed us and he's here there's just some decisions I need to make and I don't know how and they consist of medication I did not medicate my oldest son and we worked through his life just fine things were tough a lot of times but we managed and thank God we made it it's just that I'm older now and I'm not that well and my husband is not that well either so we really don't know what to do but thank you for sharing your story and I wish you all the best with your boy God bless you

Mikesymommy profile image
Mikesymommy in reply toFaith2myboi

Thank you. Must be hard parenting the second time around with age and poor health. But hopefully you have gained lots of wisdom! I wish you and your son the best. ❤

Cin9 profile image
Cin9

Hi

Our son is almost 10 years old. I always knew every since he was a baby that something was going on. He has been medicated since the first grade due to his inability to focus in class and impulse control. He has also been diagnosed with sensory disorder. Our son also had baseball tryouts last week and had a major meltdown before we even got there. He has a hard time dealing with anything out of his daily routine. Yes it's hard to watch all the other kids really focusing and trying their best when my son is kind of all over the place, and not understanding that it is tryouts not just playtime!! He wants to play baseball but then gets upset when he is not doing as good as the other boys. It's heartbreaking to watch and really we just want him to have fun but at this age the coaches, parents and the kids are starting to take it more serious.

Our son too is a bit rough and likes to get in peoples space a bit too much too, but does not like it when people get into his. Every day is a struggle and we just try to get through the day the best we can at this point. I wish you the best for your son and your family.

Mikesymommy profile image
Mikesymommy in reply toCin9

Wow. Sounds like we are going thru a lot of the same things. Im not sure yet if theres a way for us to stay connected but i would love to chat some more. Glad to hear we are not alone in this.

Cin9 profile image
Cin9 in reply toMikesymommy

Yes, let's stay connected! I will start following you and I think we can message from there. I just joined here and it's nice to know that we are not alone!

Faith2myboi profile image
Faith2myboi in reply toMikesymommy

Yes thanks so much. I truly appreciate your support. I do think it would be a great idea for us to stay in touch. I to wish you all the best with your son as well. I know every day is a task, but with the support and sharing that we all give each other we will make it. Our children will be happy and healthy and successful in life. Remember it all begins with us. We homeschool our son due to our health and age. I know not everyone has the liberty to do that, but I thank God we can. It does make it a little less stressful because we don't have to worry about incidents happening in school but my prayers go out to you and everyone else doesn't have the option of homeschooling. God willing in time things will get better the days will become easier along with the years of our boys growing up into fine young gentleman.

BVBE profile image
BVBE

Hi, you told my our story (minus the baby :) ). Same thing... first month in first grade he became 'that kid'. We have done a lot to correct this behavior (his school ha's been amazing!) We put him on meds as well. A mood stabilizer and a stimulate during the day (when needed). Night and day difference! It will be better!

Mikesymommy profile image
Mikesymommy in reply toBVBE

Thank you..glad to see there is light at the end of the tunnel!

anirush profile image
anirush

My grandson is 11 years old. I now have gotten used to the fact that he's never going to be the best on the team, he's going to embarrass us in public periodically, he's not going to be the one getting academic accolades.

Small accomplishments become a big deal. It is hard.

22789 profile image
22789

Medication is often suggested as just one component of a multi-modal treatment plan. Extensive parent education including how to parent as a coach rather than an authoritarian has made a huge difference for us. We learn something new about ADHD and co-morbid anxiety weekly; sometimes several times a week. We have a behavioral consultant through our school district whose involvement has led to the extinguishment, modification, or management of behaviors and coping skills for our son who struggles with very low frustration tolerance. Our son sees a psychologist. His meds are managed by a psychiatrist rather than a pediatrician. It helps us to remember that children with ADHD are typically developmentally delayed three to five years. In some areas it is roughly two to three years for our son and others closer to four or five years. With all the supports in place my son is able to earn straight as a gifted student who will be in the middle school honors program next year, he plays tag football, baseball, is a Boy Scout and able to fully participate in school music or talent shows.

Mikesymommy profile image
Mikesymommy in reply to22789

My son is seen by a psychologist and our meds are given by a psychiatrist as well. We have our school iep meeting coming up and theyve been testing him and was seen by the school pychologist. What is frustrating is none of this is seen as a problem at school as while medicated he does very well. So the school pychologist isnt going to take him on. I mean im happy hes doing well, but at the same time it needs to be noted how is without meds/coming off meds as well.

Your story brings back flashbacks. My youngest son, now 13, has been through similar issues. He is diagnosed with ADHD and PDD-NOS, and has very impulsive behavior.. Grade 2 was the worst year ever for us. He was in trouble constantly at school. Little league was a nightmare. We wanted to try other treatments before meds. We tried neurofeedback during 2nd grade. Did not help. We also tried a naturapathic doctor. By the end of 2nd grade ended I was done. We went to pediatrician and said we are ready for meds. Luckily for my son the first one we tried worked (Concerta). He has been on ever since (now is in 7th grade). While it doesn't help with the impulsive behavior it does help tremendously. My son has been doing karate for about 6 years now and I have to say it's probably the best sport for someone like him. If you find a good karate school they are extremely good at helping with self control, confidence, and respect. You should definitely look into karate. Another good sport is cross country (which your son is too young for now) but it's never too late to get him out at the track jogging and getting all of that energy out. My son has also done counseling in past. We stopped this year when he told me he didn't need it anymore and he could figure it out on his own. As they mature they do learn more acceptable behaviors and how to control themselves. My son probably gets in trouble about once a year at school now and is able to control himself around other middle school kids/situations. He does not have a lot of friends but a couple of good ones and I make sure to get together with them outside of school when possible. There is hope and though it may seem difficult now I guarantee it will get better as long as you keep an open mind and try different things to help your son until you find what works at that particular time. It will change as he gets older and you will need to try something else. Best of luck.

Klau07 profile image
Klau07

I’m sorry to hear that, is a journey and is really really hard. All I can tell you is patience that everything is going to get better. It sucks people judge and people just think that we can’t control our children but nobody realizes that is not that. I hope it all get better for ya.

Mikesymommy profile image
Mikesymommy in reply toKlau07

Thank you for your kind words.

geemamom profile image
geemamom

hey there, i am new also. grandson 5 recently formally diagnosed and started meds.

just wanted to let you know you are not alone at all, my little man was getting very violent at school, flipping desks and tables, throwing chairs. he has a new baby cousin [3 months] who he adores but also doesnt always respect boundaries with her, picking her up out of her sleeper and carrying her etc. you are not alone! :hug:

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