Issues with the school: Hello everyone... - CHADD's ADHD Pare...

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Issues with the school

Penntrixie profile image

Hello everyone, I am new here. My son is 5, recently diagnosed with ADHD AND ODD he has had nothing but issues at school and is being violent and aggressive. We are still trying to find a therapist and regulate his meds as it has only been about 1 month since he was diagnosed. The school told me that I shouldn't even bother sending him to school and when I still sent him back the next day, they said he was out of cobtrol, sent him home and suspended him. Now my child has a lot of issues but he doesn't lie. I asked him what happened and he told me. His story differed so much from the school principals it was crazy. I was told that with him being diagnosed with a disability they are supposed to attempt to work with him and can not send him home or suspend him..How do I go about dealing with his school not wanting to deal with him?

16 Replies

You need to get an IEP for him.

I know exactly how you feel I have a 5th grader that has ADHD and anger issues and I have been dealing with this for 3 years. I'm frustrated with the school and his behavior and I don't know what to do. And he has an IEP

Jennifer_g profile image
Jennifer_g in reply to Cbarrett

I have the same problem and I had to transfer him schools today maybe new school will help what is IEP

Sometimes it's the environment that sets them off. Definitely get him an IEP and give examples to your psychiatrist or behavioralist on what he's been doing at school so they can help troubleshoot.

First of all go to the school superintendent because the schools supposed to be able to give him a one on one person in his classroom maybe you could also make a doctor visits because sometimes the medication may be too strong for the child body and weight size so when he is feeling a funny or as we will say high on drugs and he does not understand his emotions so the only response you may get from him is being violent or aggressive you have to also looking to the medication because a lot of the time the medication might need the child to be drinking a lot of water on the school don't allow them to be taken water breaks all day so the medication end up not working right and still wanting to need it is a lot of water and to be in a environment that the temperature is right because a lot of the time the medication makes them feel very hot i'm in the summertime kids A very frustrated especially if they are hot with a dry mount believe you me it's not nice so try sending him to school with extra water so at least his body does not dehydrate the medication May have that side effect

baconbitzmommy profile image
baconbitzmommy in reply to

The school has to allow him or her to drink during the day if it is for medical reasons. My son takes a water bottle to school with him. They put it on the counter but he is allowed to drink all day. You just need a doctor's note.

mrl12 profile image
mrl12 in reply to baconbitzmommy

I'm flabergasted that any kid would need a doctor's note to drink water. No wonder these kids hate school so much.

I suggest that you make an appointment with the teacher and find out what is going on. Unless you know what is happening, and what is expected, you can't know how to react. Hearing both sides will allow you to decide what needs to be done. You are correct that he has the right to be in school, but don't approach it that way. If you will approach it with concern (and firmness, not anger!) you will have an ally at school in the teacher. Ask her what she wants you to do, because obviously it will be her job to control him during school hours.

How do I know all this? I am a retired teacher. Feel free to ask me anything! I promise, I will tell you the truth.

In my experience, the principal is hearing the issue second-hand. The teacher is your best resource.

Jennifer_g profile image
Jennifer_g in reply to

What happens wh4n u know the teacher is fed up and tired of ur son

Get a good description of the behaviors at school and work with his doctor to determine the reason. This can help decide what to do.

Sounds like my life. My 5 yo ADHD ODD son was sent to the principal last Friday on day 8 of kindergarten. My son has an iep and is in an ict class. He isn't medicated yet, but I'm going to look into it once i can find a dr /therapy program. Go to ADDitude magazine online. They have a great webcast on ODD that had lots of great info. Look into The Defiant Child Program by Russell Bradley. In the webcast I viewed they said if you don't see results w the meds 3-4 days you should reevaluate the dosage or prescription. Best of luck! I know how hard this is!

Boymom3 profile image
Boymom3 in reply to kristinac

Russell Barkley is a great resource. He also has YouTube videos.

I feel the schools are trying to put everyone in the same box. I am struggling myself with what to say to the teachers at my sons high school. Any suggestions would be great.

My son refused all through school to use his IEP (computer) because he would have been the only kid in his class using one and he would have been centered out. Embarrassed.

Public schools have to evaluate but you must insist, in writing he be evaluated and then given an IEP. Parent training helps a lot. Make sure you have a pediatric psychiatrist and are not just leaving it for a pediatrician. A PED Psych will have other options for training for you and his father. These are just as important as medication. Look at Wright’s Law.org. You son should be eligible under OTHER HEALTH IMPAIRMENT & Emotional Disturbance. Don’t let the terms freak you out, just get the IEP. Making sure the IEP is followed is just as difficult. Practice self care and educate yourself and dad. Sometimes dad’s don’t want to admit it but once they do, things go more smoothly.

I made my husband take a class at Easter Seals and he finally started to get on board.

Russell Barkley, Dr. Greene. The Highly Explosive Child.

It’s a long haul. A marathon, not a sprint. Good luck and educate yourself as well as take care of yourself! Good luck

The one thing that helped my son get help from school was to have him formally evaluated. I don't know if this is true for all states but you can request a school evaluation from the special education department and they are obligated to complete it. If they can't provide the evaluation at school, you may be able to have them pay for a private evaluation. Once my son was evaluated, he started to get the help he needed. I also paid for the psychologist that did his private evaluation to attend his IEP meeting so that I wouldn't get railroaded by the school district. My best advice is to look up and read everything you can about your rights for your state. The more you know, the better equipped you will be. My son's pediatrician diagnosed him with ADHD/Executive Function disorder. His private evaluation backed it up. Schools will fight you and won't give you help unless you make them (at least that is what I have found). Good luck!

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