We are considering trying medication for my 15 year old son. He was diagnosed 4 years ago with ADHD, inattentive kind, disgraphia and a math disability. He started high school this year and is really struggling, especially with taking tests. Test are worth 80% off his grade and he is failing most of them in every class he has. He is allowed to use a notecard on every test but even with that he is still not doing well at all. I help him study, keep him organized, go over what he did in each class every night to make sure he keeps up on his assignments and I feel like nothing is working. He's a great kid but I feel like my constant nagging him about school, assignments, studying, tests, etc. is really taking a toll on our relationship. He also has low self esteem when it comes to school. We really try to boost him up but when he is trying and constantly seeing F's he gets very discouraged. The only thing I can think of is to try him on some medication to see if that helps him. Has anyone had experience with this same story? Has anyone seen a difference in their child's school work after starting medication?
Thank you in advance for your feedback.
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Does he have a 504 plan to help get him extra assistance? You can add things like test is a separate area, sit near teacher or in front, take notes on laptop, extra time on all assignments including tests. You can also ask for tutoring in classes. We are lucky enough to pay for tutors outside of school.
Yes! If medication can help him that could help a lot. Our son take medication to help with focus ( non stimulant).
In addition our son has a therapist to give him a space to discuss his challenges and needs.
I hope you can get him support so he can start to be successful!
We always always here for you when you need support.
Thank you so much for your reply. He is on an IEP which does allow extra time on assignments and tests. He is offered a chance to go to the resource room to take his test which I make sure he is doing now (he wasn't earlier in the year, he is embarrassed to get up in front of his peers and walk out of the room, so now he just goes to the resource room and doesn't even go to his classroom when he takes a test). They do allow him to use a notecard on test but at his IEP meeting, they said this will be the last year. They want to prepare him for college and they say he can't use one in college. I have been thinking about a therapist too so maybe I will look more into that as well.
When he goes to college he should have a 504 plan not an IEP. So if he has an IEP he should have goals that help him learn the material to get better grades. If that is not happening you should ask for another IEP.
I am not sure how much time he has with the resource room? Can that be increased? They should be reviewing each class and what he is missing or not understanding they shpuld help with.
I would not eliminate the card until senior year, he has a lot of classes to pass. If the card is not helping, I wonder if it is all just to overwhelming? One of the thing the counseling can help with is asking for help when he is overwhelmed.
If he is struggling let's not worry about college, maybe help with passing each class.
I'll chime in here, as I also have a 15 year-old, mine with inattentive ADHD and a language disorder. Mine takes generic Concerta ER and he reports that he apprpeciates how it helps him get through the school day. On the occassional day that he forgets to take his meds, he comes home feeling like he has gotten nothing done. I'm in the lucky situation of finding a winning med on the first try and having a kids who appreciates the benefits of it. It is worth trying.
As for the rest, I am glad that your kid is on an IEP, as that brings addtional resources. Mine goes to Resource Room twice a week instead of study hall and he is a leader among the IEP kids! I'm glad that he has this experience, as he can feel "othered" in his general education classrooms. His Resource Room teacher appreciates his intelligence, calm demeanor, and quirky sense of humor, and I appreciate that he has this person in the school building. As you might be able to tell, I am a HUGE fan of Resource Room!
My kid asked to see a therapist last fall (I know, he's a unicorn) and meets with her once a week to reflect on his feelings on being neurodivergent in a neurotypical world.
Finally, back to the schoolwork, when my kids is mentally ready to commit, I am planning to get him a professionally-credentialed ADHD coach to help him with his schoolwork. To me, this feels like the missing link (his grades are the pits right now) but I also know that he needs to be motivated to get any benefit from working with one.
Good luck on your journey. Your son is lucky to have you in his corner.
Thank you for your reply! I will talk with his doctor about Concerta when we see him next week.
WOW! Your son is amazing for asking to see a therapist! I just talked to my son about this yesterday and he acted like I was crazy. I am going to keep working on him though because I think it would really help him with his low self esteem.
it could be an adhd concentration issue, but have you thought about anxiety? Test anxiety is a thing. Also, does he have an iep? You can ask for different accommodations around testing. Any idea what trips him up?
In high school, my daughter was on adhd medication and had a 504 plan in place. With those measures she still struggled getting her assignments done. Nagging her to do her work also led to heated arguments. ADHD is not an impairment in knowledge. It is an impairment in performance. She knew what to do, but she was not able to take the actions required to do her assignments. I hired an executive function coach to teach her how to accommodate for her executive function deficits. With patience, she learned how to succeed academically and was accepted to the college of her choice. Of note over the last 2 months there was a shortage of her adhd medication. She did struggle a bit off the medication, but her medication is now in stock and she is back on track. I believe there is a place for medication in the treatment of ADHD. I wrote an article about our journey and attached a link if you would like to read it. Good luck!!
My now 15 year old son was diagnosed with ADHD combined type at 8. It took me a few months to accept that medication is to help my son, and there is nothing shameful about it (that was my issue, I am not suggesting it's one of yours). We tried a few things, and settled on methylphenidate (started at 10mg immediate release in 4th grade and by the 8th grade he was on 30mg ER methylphenidate). In high school, he needed a longer effect for both school hours and homework, and after some trial and error, he is now taking generic Adderall - 30mg Dextroamphetamine-amphetamine ER.
Without medication, he wasn't able to focus on his school work, quizzes, tests, and homework. I can't imagine him going to school without. He also takes 20 mg immediate release on a weekend day when he has h/w to do. I've read that a combination of therapy and meds is the best course of help for adhd kid, but we tried multiple therapists over the years and I didn't see much effect. Must recently, my son, when he was 14, just said he wouldn't go anymore (after some 4-5 months with the latest therapist), because the therapist was trying to build my son's awareness of this condition, and my son said that it was just making him feel bad. He would rather focus on the positives of adhd.
I also make sure he stays busy and has at least 3-4 sports practices weekly (he used to to also have a math tutor, piano and a full day of language school on Saturday - dropped all of those son after turning 14). He has a ton of energy, and sports help let his steam out (but just a bit, haha).
He took up working out at the gym when he turned 14, and is now in wrestling. Both help build his self-esteem, and the latter gives an additional, huge benefit - being part of a boys group.
So for us, medication and sports have been both very, very helpful.
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