Good morning everyone, the sun is shining but its that day again. Feeling awful and my legs feel like lead!!!!!

Its the day I have to go to job centre again and sign on but I'm taking my blood test form with me to get photocopied, and my increased anti depressants with me to get photocopied so they can sent it off to the decision maker who hasn't made a decision yet. I've decided anything new, I'm going to photocopy and send off.

My body is aching and I'm having muscle spasms, my back has locked on me so hot shower here I come. I'm feeling very down as every time I go there, I get treated like I'm anaughty schoolchild.

They shout at me as I wear hearing aids and think its funny. All they need to do is speak slow and clear, they think depression is not an illness and tell me that there is nothing wrong with me.

When I come home after going there, I feel more depressed and end up having a good cry. Any suggestions on how to cope with them?????

16 Replies

  • Morning Maisie,

    Sorry, no idea how to cope with these idiots but hope it's not as bad as you're expecting it to be.

    Maybe you could ask if they have a quiet room where you could be least it's not public then.

    Take two photocopies and ask them to sign one as receipt for you to keep then you can show you've given them evidence.

    Good luck Hun,



  • Thanks Lorraine for your reply, every week I start picking myself up and feeling abit better about everything. Then D Day comes( when I have to sign on) and I'm back to stage 1.

    They seem to know that I'm terrified as I'm shaking and my mind goes blur.

    My biggest problem is they know I have a big fear of strangers as it is on my file and they just seem to make matters worse by giving me a different coach. :-)

  • Hi Maisie,

    Good luck today at the job centre.

    Im afraid I dont have any advice but just think you are better than these idiots that work here.

    Why cant people be more patient and understanding.

    Whenever I speak to the DWP about my ESA I feel like I am doing something wrong.

    I expect I will get interviewed at the job centre soon as Im applying for DLA, or PIP as its now called.

    David x

  • Thanks David, it makes me so mad as they aren't nice or helpful at all.

    For years I've fought this depression and have learnt how to live with it now , after so many suicide attempts and yrs of counselling.

    Someone needs to start a petition saying that depression IS an illness !!!!!

  • Hi Maisie

    I am sorry you feel so awful especially when you have to go and face people who treat you so insensitively. When you are feeling a bit stronger I wonder whether you might write to the job centre manage and say how you feel about being hard of hearing and that not being treated with respect. Also you might consider getting an advocate from Mind as then you would have someone to come with you a few times which might enable you to feel increased assertiveness. You are entitled to be treated with respect and courtesy.

    I hope things go well today, a hot shower does wonders doesn't it!


  • Hi maisie.

    All the forms frustrate me !, and why on earth should we be expected to live on our own hard earned savings,,when we have paid into the system for all our working lives?.

    Insurance forms frustrate me also , its taken nearly six months for all my insurances to get details from doctors and hospitals etc.

    I am dreading the day when I have to go down the job centre, but for now that's not an option !.

    And in just over a week im in for another operation on my injured foot, so I wont be able to climb stairs etc.

    I remember trying to claim a couple of years ago when I lost my job, I got just .45 pounds a week .

    It frustrates me to see the people , who have never worked and have no intention of working !.

    But good luck maisie.

    I would say keep your cool ,,as they expect trouble from some of the people they have to deal with ,,you've probably seen and heard them ? the shouters and the swearers!!.

    pete x

  • Oh dear Maisie you don't seem to be treated very well by the staff there. I agree that you should put something in writing to a manager. David as an ex employee of the DWP, I don't condone their treatment of Maisie at all but there is a common misconception about DWP staff that they are 'idiots'. They are not but they have to follow the rules, they are told what to say and what conditions to impose and this comes from much higher up. They have targets and very little time with each client. If they don't follow the rules they will be sacked and end up unemployed themselves. The front line staff have no power to change anything. They are under a huge amount of pressure. My advice to you Maisie is to 'play the game'. If they tell you to apply for jobs do it, you probably won't even get an interview. One thing you can do is to get a letter from your doctor limiting the hours you can work ie 25 hours a week or something. That should help. Good luck with your claim for ESA and PIP. If I can help any further please pm me Maisie. xx

  • Sorry coughalot, didnt mean to generalise about DWP staff being idiots. I used to work with the public on the frontline at a ticket office for the ferry company to the Isle Of Wight. That is where my anxiety came to an head. The public were so rude and aggressive. I understand if DWP staff arent always patient if they have just dealt with a difficult customer. However, something I learnt when dealing with the public is to take every customer individually. You cant take out frustrations on someone else. Dealing with people with anxiety issues and other mental health issues need special attention and care. Not to be made to feel uncomfortable. We have feelings of being inadequate already. I know most of what I think is in my imagination and not really true, as my wife tells me, but special care is appreciated..

    Sorry to go on but I think Masiemoo has a good point here about institutions not treating mental health as a real illness. I dont just mean the Job centres and DWP but I have found insurance companies and banks not so helpful when I declared depression on forms under medical history.

    I expect it is society generally including my family who dont accept depression as a real illness. My Dad said to me recently, when I told him that I am applying for DLA, why, you arent disabled are you or unemployable. When I answered yes to him he was suprised. Its not his fault but just ignorance.

    What can we do to help society learn more about this illness?

  • Hi David thanks for your remarks. Wasn't having a go at you personally I hope you know that! It's something I hear all the time and it annoys me. i agree that you should be tackful when dealing with the public and generally I was (I used to work in the contact centre taking benefit claims) but we are all human and I know that from time to time I got a bit curt with people sometimes. Especially when I was under threat of dismissal. Incidentely it wasn't (for me anyway) the customers who were the problem it was management targets and pressure and stupid rules. The customers were the least of my worries...

    The DWP didn't understand mental health issues at all though they said they did. They sacked all those who were off sick with depression or stress, including me.

    My family don't understand depression either. when I told one of my sisters she looked at me and said 'what have you got to be depressed about' because I wasn't working at the time. Some of my friends do though thank goodness. xx

  • Hi Cough, I didnt take anything personally. I understand what its like about targets and rules. Thats why Im giving up work for a while.

    We do and say things which upset people unintentionally who are usually our closest family and friends. I upset my wife last night over a silly thing. We are ok this morning. Its all to do with people not realising that things we say are not us talking its the illness talking.

    We should never worry about upsetting anyone on here as we all know understand each other.

    My wife and I were just saying at breakfast that it would be good to turn the clock back ten years to how we used to be. That was the real me talking then. I dont know myself anymore. Maybe its the medication.

    Have a good day. Im just off to the gym to de-stress.

    David x

  • That's basically what I was meaning dave,,the staff at the job centres ,,have to deal with allsorts,,.

    But I also agree with cough !.

    They do have targets !.

    Depression unfortunately , is a condition that cannot outwardly be seen !.

    I just feel that masie is being treated unfairly , because other than her anxiety she has other physical problems .


  • Maisie, I hope it wasn't too traumatic for you today.Thinking of you X

  • They sound like complete jerks. Maybe you could make a formal complaint? Or even get a friend to do it or perhaps your doctor if you tell them it makes you feel worse?

    Perhaps you should explain to them that they don't need to shout, only speak more slowly so you can pick up the words.

    Where do you live? I have signed on in Scotland twice in my life and I am shocked by the treatment you have received. I felt my advisors were encouraging. But then again I didn't tell them about my mental health and they knew I was trying my utmost hardest and therefore knew I wouldn't be around long.

    I'm sorry you're having to deal with that. It's not right. Depression is a recognised illness and is more debiliating than some physical disabilities.

    They don't understand you Hun. They don't suffer from this horrible illness, so how could they possibly understand? You don't have to feel bad about them because they're not worth it. They are probably bored by their routine jobs and enjoy picking on others, much like the bullies at school.

    Keep your head held high when you're in there and tell yourself you're better than them, which you are because you would never treat anyone like that :) x

  • Thanks everyone for your replies. I've been in shock since I got home as the lady at the job centre was lovely.

    She ask how I was doing and how my Emphysema, scoliosis and other illnesses were. I asked her to photocopy the blood test form and tablet packet and she did, then she asked if there was anything else she could help me with.

    For once I got treated like a person, I must admit I'm abit curious as to why after all these months they were nice to me. Even my daughter was shellshock!!!

    Its too good to be true!!!! :-) :-)

  • Being treated with compassion and respect makes a difference to all our mental health I think, so pleased you had this good experiene today gemma X

  • Oh Maisie that's great news. But as Cough said, these people are just doing

    A job, and have their own problems.

    All in all that's good . You deserve it. X

    Hannah x

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