Something is not right here... - Mental Health Sup...

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Something is not right here...

JuneShultz1011 profile image

Hey Y'all, I'm 16. I've for almost a year had the worst Anxiety and Depression, Suicide has been a recurring thought but never actually considered, Contemplated or attempted. I can be so down, Low, Don't go outside unless I have to (Example, School or Stuff Like That) I find myself wrecking my friendships, at times I have a lift in mood, I become excited and overly enthused for no reason (Lasts for around an hour or something but thinking of it, it's not even pleasant just well unbearable) My Pupils dilate a lot but I've had times of feeling Miserable but Hyper at the same time, Anxious to heck but running around talking and laughing etc etc. (The Past Week Or So) Have felt really warm, great, Enthused, Energised, Healthy, and Outgoing like I need to start going out and like start making plans to decorate my room and just small things like that but usually at night I'm back to that horrible miserable self, I don't feel ashamed or anything like that I just, Find myself making a decision on anything then omitting it as I feel that I hate it, Like I make a decision and then just look back and be like 'What the hell. That doesn't make sense or that's boring) I had an instance me and a friend fell out and overreacted to the point I was going to move schools, My Mind just can't stick with a defined choice or decision, I just feel so confused and mentally exhausted. (I know I can't be diagnosed or even fully given an opinion, I fully appreciate that But honestly, It's beyond normal 'teenage blues' I would still ask for y'all opinions whether right or not Thank You All.

32 Replies

That all does sound very chaotically exhausting. Have you seen a GP at all? Hormones do play a lot in these situations but you're right that it's more than teenage blues

Yes, They have referred me to a counsellor, But Forgive me If I'm wrong but It's not an actual trigger in my life, If You get me, It's not a situation, I just can't control it, When I went I was having IBS Symptoms (Anxiety) only when Anxious, But then Depression been getting worse and more persistent from February onwards, Have been obsessed with finding out what this is and people ''Understand'' but they just don't get that I don't mean these things, I know that when I return to school I'll most likely experience Anxiety but maybe A Hyper aspect, I'm just so bored and miserable even though I can be 'Hyper' You know. I've had tests for everything like Thyroid issues *Mother has that* But It's all fine.

I do 'get' what you mean but it does have an impact on your life so there is some reason it's happening. My friend is similar, very erratic. So it is happening for a reason and maybe a counsellor has the knowledge to pin point an explanation x

No, They seem to just set goals for me to do, Like Going out. I'm just getting worse. I feel dead inside no matter what. I'm so out of reach, Here in England, There's no possibility for medication til your 18. At least in my County. I just have no luck. I feel at the wrong time, Sometimes I wished to be in the 1920s etc, Then the 1980s and my mind just constantly changes, I want to be like Mae West, Then No, I want to do what Madonna does, No I want to live a normal life and just constant cycling like that. I sometimes hope to get worse so people realise but I just can't have this much longer. I've got no Appetite and Sometimes I just long for living here then there and stuff like that I'm just losing it. Big Time

It sounds really psychotic so I feel for you terribly. It's hard to not know who you are, why you're here, why you were even born. I'm very surprised you're not allowed medication.

Me too. The other night was so miserable I broke down and said I need to get away from this city Or see a doctor, I find myself skipping school and stuff I wouldn't usually do. I was once at an Aunts house alone, Well, Without my mom, Everyone was in bed, I could swear I seen shadows, Figures tho, It was dark I still saw them, Could not make them out. I feel such a heavy pressure on my head, May I ask *I do know what Psychotic means but what do you mean in my case?* Thanks, Lovely to talk with someone who considers my feelings Heh

Have you actually told your GP/counsellor these bouts that happen? Like fully and honestly? Please do. I'm off out now so take care for now x

Thanks, Have a great time x. I'm going to be completely honest. Not that I haven't but You Know.

As I told you in reply to your latest post, GPs do NOT know how to interpret thyroid blood test results. They don't have the time to learn anything about thyroid. I asked you to join the Thyroid section and write a post copying the full thyroid blood results on there. For example, the TSH test has a range of 0.5 to 10. If your result is say 5, you will feel insane but it still looks ok to the doctor. You have a legal right to have a copy of those blood tests; you need to ask at GP reception (or ask for practice manager if receptionists refuse) for a copy. You are going round in circles. You MUST be able to discount a thyroid problem before you confirm there is a psychological or psychiatric problem. Please be proactive. All people here can say is - there there, dear, hope you feel better soon. Sorry to sound harsh, but the NHS is virtually bankrupt; we have to help ourselves, do research, try to understand what is happening to our body.


JuneShultz1011 profile image
JuneShultz1011 in reply to

What's that? Oh, Samaritans?

I think the majority of people have suicidal thought's at some point,i have had them since 14 i am 29 now and still here(yay me,not really) but i still get them even now,my sub conscience has been telling me for years to end it but ive seen first hand how it effects the people you care about so thats why i am still here, but anyway i guess it can be considered suicidal ideation in that you have thought's of suicide but have no intetion of carrying it out(perhaps)

In regard's to your friendships,you are still young friends will come and go,certain friendships last the test of time others will just fade into nothingness,thats life in general,out of all my friends in school i now only talk to one out of many i had growing up and through school it is only one i ever talk with or socialise with now.

I don't see how you can not be checked for anything such as depression,bpd,bp,etc,etc because i only just read an article earlier about a guy that was diganosed with bpd at the age of 15.

I guess in teenagers it is more difficult to determine the cause of their behavior due to the obvious changes that teenagers go through,i think you should perhaps write everything down,and then give it to your counsellor and open up and speak truthfully about your feelings in general.

It will be the only way it will work, basically if you open your self up to them and tell them about any suicidal thought's etc they may be able to understand you and your thought process more.

Thanks love x

You Mentioned Bipolar, Does It sound like that??

i wouldnt hazard a guess, there are a number of things that can point in a million directions only a professional will be able to answer that question there is no real point in saying it sounds like this or that because in fact it can be anything.

It could be down to diet,hormones,depression,anixiety,enviroment,etc,there are a million kinds of directions it can go in.

I would say don't look at everything as a symptom,everything is not a symptom its a feeling,write that feeling down,keep a diary of your moods,keep a diary of how you feel,at least then you can give any counsellor an idea of how your moods change.

What event's that have gone on during that day etc.

Alright x Thanks

Hi I think you've taken a very big positive step by talking about it. I understand just how you feel I had the same feelings at school but never spoke a word to anyone about it and now I'm 25 and still haven't properly. The combination of my hyped up anxiety outbursts & the overwhelming low depressed moods fuelled each other. Pushing all my friends away in my low moods by not going out/texting/speaking to them and in my hyped moods by nervously not shutting up to the point even my own head was screaming at me to shut up & stop being so annoying. I'd also do/say things that I normally wouldn't. I would become someone I hated. Which then made me more anxious to see them so the low periods lasted longer & longer. Even if you can't get anything prescribed, talking to a GP, mental Heath nurse, counsellor etc is definitely a great start. It'll probably take a while for them to properly diagnose you. I tried once but they were dismissive of me even though it had gotten to the point of self harming. Doctors just gave me pills for depression and sent me away. From what I've gathered online pills alone won't work, it's a combination of a counselling, excercise, medication in some cases and a good diet even though when hyper food is the last thought on your mind and seems pointless when low. I found breakfast bars were a good way to avoid skipping meals when you really don't want to eat. It's all easier said than done, I've currently made myself anaemic by cutting meals. I can't tell you what's right to do (wish I knew) but I know keeping quite, hiding it, dismissing it or hoping it goes away won't make it better. I was too scared to get help (still am) and it's fantastic you're talking about it and seem so self aware. I never thought of the shadows being a symptom (honestly thought I was losing my mind with that one)

JuneShultz1011 profile image
JuneShultz1011 in reply to A-q-

100%. My art class for an unknown reason makes me laugh constantly, become controversal, make points i ''believe'' in but actually never, kinda offensive but i make my mate laugh, the teacher laughs too but i know im annoying. i try to make a change but its always there, im not that brave at all haha, but thanks love, u too. im here too if u need me, :)

A-q- profile image
A-q- in reply to JuneShultz1011

Thank you that's very sweet of you.

The kind of blunt truth jokes that are really harsh? They're true and you know it but it's like your looking at it through the harshest perspective (no sugar coating lol) Its like you say it, laugh and go through the motions but you don't really feel it, if anything a lil sad/bad inside or I always feel like I've lost part of my innocence or something.

From what I've read you may feel hyper in art because it's a creative class. Mania (the highs) makes you feel like you've got lots of energy, ambitious plans and ideas. You may spend lots of money on things you can't afford and wouldn't normally want. (Me being stupid went and got store cards & credit cards and maxed them in days) Won't want to eat or sleep, talking quickly and getting annoyed easily are the main signs i know off.

JuneShultz1011 profile image
JuneShultz1011 in reply to A-q-

I loose apatite but the highs last not long

hi JuneSchultz, so sorry to hear that you feel low and kind of lost. Would it be of help if I tell you that I used to suffer as well and carried the scars until recently. I'm nearly 60. They always say I wish I know when I was young what I know now. What I did was a digging in all the bad memories from the past and the root is always in childhood. Sometimes our parents are not ready and don't know well how to look after us, children. It is also to do with the hormonal imbalance during adolescent years. We all suffer like you, sometimes more or less and then there are shiny days. Is like the weather here in UK, all the seasons very defined and even in summer we have very cloudy days and it rains. The whole world has good and bad days. Keep your head up, face the storms and dance under the rain. Sing and dance when you are happy and if you wish, sit down and do some meditation and also yoga. Love yourself and love life. Love and light!

You sound very much like me, you need to see your GP and get referred to local CAMHS but you could have a personality disorder of some type.

Done that all. I'm in Ypass currently, They just listen but do nothing, They just dont care, Nor do my school, They say grades are more important than mental health, but i know im smart without a piece of paper to prove it, im smart about life, id rather be academically ''unable'' than depressed. i feel like just leaving

Hello June, Can you stand one more person advising you? I'm going to recommend seeing another GP if you are able to do that. You need to be able to dismiss all possibilities of a physical illness, and then you can focus on whatever this is. You need a GP to get to the correct therapist and to find out if medication is indicated. It sounds like manic/depression to me (I have no medical background) but there are other disorders that will cause the highs and lows you are experiencing.So it is important to get a proper diagnosis. At the moment try and find some balance in your life. Think of the people and activities that will calm you and also cheer you when you need that. Try to find something to focus on to instill some discipline in your life. School ? Don't plan on solving everything at once, small gains are so much easier and eventually add up. Keeping a journal is a good way of getting to know yourself but it needs to be private so you can be honest. I am a retired Art teacher and I know art lets you say a lot of things you might not get away with. It can be a great tool and a release for the feelings we don't always know what to do with. You will find your way. Pam

Thanks Love x, Advice if Helpful is always welcome... I've been busy all this week, But uncontrollably Infatuated on a crush, He's with some girl, i know i can never get there, (This is something I have an issue with) But I feel like i can just get who and what I want. Because im better (deep down im not but i feel this way uno?) im feeling quite freaking happy tho i can start the day absolutly depressed then freaking high so im not sure, But thanks for your advice, I kinda (dont take this the wrong way) hoped it may be Manic Depression or (Bipolar) due to the highs involved, but i just want to be strong... For myself honestly. I have the inability to cry when i want to, Then when i dont, i absolutly cry for endless amounts. I just although feel great know something is up, I dont revise for tests, Im called lazy, but i just have no time at all. You get me? So Busy doing other things, then regret it, IM feeling quite inspired tho and have been getting vivid dreams so sharp and realistic than ever, dreaming about passed people whom are no longer here and have been writing endless poems, sexual appetite is always high, not naturally tho, im just texting that boy constantly and i feel like im being annoying but cant help myself, i just see myself getting everything, next minute im ugly, hopeless and will fail at everything :( Sorry if i rambled just some info i needed to add lol, Thanks x

I have had many of those same feelings. Make good use of the highs and don't take the lows too seriously.

The Problem is the Highs, Are Deep down very hurtful, I just don't even really enjoy it. In school too, When i wan't rid of the anxiety and needing the toilet every second from it, The highs never come.

Aw, I'm sorry for making light of your symptoms. I know you suffer and I think you need someone to lead you through this. I can tell from your posts that you are experiencing highs and lows and it makes it hard to know how to respond. You do sound like a strong person, strong enough to over come this. No one does it alone. Do you experience anxiety all the time? Anxiety was my major problem I'm quite familiar with it. I know it to be a liar. It gives you false information about yourself. It can convince you that you are about to collapse , no one dies from anxiety.Have you talked to your school consolers, is there anyone there you can go to? Are you able to leave the room if you need to.? These things might make your days easier. Pam

No, I know what You meant, you are right, Just not for me you know. Anxiety mainly at school and in front of people, But only mild in front of people, Hugely at school, No matter what I do. I have, they've tried reducing hours, I'm terrified to walk in front of everyone and leave the room.

would they allow you to home school or have a tutor ? There must be a solution here. Read back through the replies you received and see if you notice how negative your responses are. People can only suggest ideas , but you are going to have to do the work. I know it's frightening, but it won't harm you

They are quite negative. I don't focus on those ones... & We've been through all this, Apparently, I can't have a tutor or be homeschooled no matter how much it affects my health (Parent's Basically Said That) I just want this pain over.

I;m sorry you're having such a hard time of it. I'm in America so I 'm not familiar with some things in the UK .. Maybe someone from the UK will jump in at this point with some advice. I'll keep an eye out and see if anyone responds.

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