Big bellylad

[Spade57]

Here's another big blowout coming this minute , sitting outside Tesco , a lot off emptiness inside me , and need comfort ( food) 😔

[YellowRose55]

Hi Spade57

Only go in if you need something, shopping on an empty stomach is never a good idea. You don't need comfort food, you need a healthy meal! Come on you can do this! Either go in with a mind to getting something healthy for tea tonight or carry on passed!

Rose

[lucigret]

So, if you really need to go in, stop and think about your favourite, healthy meal and shop for it, buy a banana and eat it on your way home and then go and drink lots of water whilst you cook that healthy meal. You can do this, don't be tempted, go look at the lard and think 'that's what i'm adding to my body if I have a blow out!

[Spade57 in reply to lucigret]

Thanks , but mind is set , need to dampen down the emptiness , with a reward , just like a kid with a sticky plaster on a leg , just need comfort, and the only comfort I know is food , junk food is the best ,

[lucigret in reply to Spade57]

need to find a new mind set then and new form of comfort, you won't find it in the junk food isle, harsh but true fact!

[Spade57 in reply to lucigret]

Yes , your speaking all sense , after a big binge comes the guilt , and the cycle continues , and very hard to get out of it ,

[lucigret in reply to Spade57]

It is hard, but you can achieve it, we will support you

[Ptfeclare in reply to Spade57]

I completely understand where your coming from. It's the same for me, I need the bad food to give me the fix to sooth the emotional pain but as i eat I know I'll regret it and then it will spital out of control for a good week or so and I feel guilty and will call myself names and there continues the cycle that I've been in my whole life where growing up eating neighbours cookies and drinking milk in their kitchen made me feel safe when everything else around me was bad. Have your comfort food but try and put a line under it and start a fresh the next day. WE CAN DO THIS AND WE WILL BEAT THIS CYCLE OR SELF DESTRUCTION x

[Spade57 in reply to Ptfeclare]

Tired of it all , don't want to get obsessed about food , , just get on the right track ,and start living life , on life's terms 😁

[Diana in reply to Spade57]

Food will never comfort you, have a hug soon if you can from a pet or someone, consider it

[Spade57 in reply to Diana]

Food gives me a quick fix , just for a moment , but then comes the guilt , and the cycle goes on and on and on

[Diana in reply to Spade57]

So try and find the fix, chat to a friend ?

Works for me

[Diana in reply to Spade57]

Ask yourself why the comfort? Food only gives a temp fix

[Spade57 in reply to Diana]

Just feel empty inside , that's the truth,!!!! Can't get that emptiness , away, because I am not happy , and been like that for a long time 😁

[lucigret in reply to Spade57]

Do you have a friend you can talk to, or a family member. Feeling empty is a horrible feeling. If you know what is making you unhappy try and find away to change what is happening.

Food really is not the answer, could you do with some counselling, do you think it would help?

[Spade57 in reply to lucigret]

Yes plenty of friends , they have given up on me with the eating binges , I think need professional help with , eating behaviour, as lost of problems deep inside , and food is just a symptom of the cause

[lucigret in reply to Spade57]

Then maybe an appointment with your Doctor would be a good idea.

[Spade57 in reply to lucigret]

I am a guy , don't do docs , it's just a matcho thing😂

[lucigret in reply to Spade57]

Guys and Dr's!!!

it's not 'not macho' to go to a Dr's.

Diana is right, life is about changing the way you look at things. You can do it, it just takes time.

Sending a macho bloke a hug

[Diana in reply to Spade57]

I think I would question, how you change your life, and what measures in terms of work and life you can realistically change.

I'm one of life's long term single folk, not happy about it, I settle for fab friends and a loving cat, than a dodgy bloke, seems far better!

Life is about changing the way you look at stuff, a whole new attitude makes everything seem easier

[Spade57 in reply to Diana]

I like the way you put that !!! All true , I think Diana , your got to love yourself first , before you can love someone else , I haven't any love left in me !!! I have given it all away !!! That's why I am empty

[Diana in reply to Spade57]

Ah you can change some of that, like yourself, smile at folk, be kind, I recently had someone who had a big thing for me, he's kind, nice and just not my type, yes I'm flattered!

In fact he has reconnected with an old flame, which I encouraged,I'm relieved!

Give yourself, your time and you, then you will feel more valued, more loved.

Another romantic love may come along later

[Spade57 in reply to Diana]

I like my own space , bit of a loaner, wasn't always like that , loved plenty of social ,

[Lin2303]

Don't give in to it - you'll only feel bad later. Grab a healthy snack, some water and then see how you feel.

[SlimmerSue62]

Whoa there step away from the unhealthy choice. Go for the healthy choice and then pat yourself on the back for not giving in to the nagging demon 😊

[Spade57 in reply to SlimmerSue62]

Not in a good place , mind wise , very negative, can't see the trees for the wood , just not happy, inside,

[lucigret in reply to Spade57]

Come along and have a go at the happiness challenge - might sound soppy to you, but anything is worth ago to turn that negativity around.

[Spade57 in reply to lucigret]

How do you do that ? , I am still trying to work this app / program out ,

[lucigret in reply to Spade57]

healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

This is the link for todays (I hope!), come and take a look. You can find it in pinned posts.

Don't be put off by it mostly being woman, we do have one man with us, it is for all.

[Spade57 in reply to lucigret]

Doh what's pinned posts?

[lucigret in reply to Spade57]

YellowRose55 please could you explain where pinned posts are to spade. I have no idea on a 'phone.

[YellowRose55 in reply to lucigret]

yes sure,

Spade57 you can find the Pinned posts on the Home page on the right hand side or if your on a mobile they will be at the bottom.

[SlimmerSue62 in reply to Spade57]

Please don't give up. We all fall off the wagon. Not always easy to carry on ( I have struggled to carry on ) I have put on 7lb since last weigh in. But have climbed back on the wagon this week. You can and will do this. With everyone's support 😊

[Spade57 in reply to SlimmerSue62]

Thank you 😊

[judomum in reply to Spade57]

Hi Spade57, I saw your post yesterday, but didn't have time to respond. I really felt for you and your situation. You say you don't do doctor's, but you clearly need help. There were some great messages posted, but you know you need to get out of this negative frame of mind.

I think slimming clubs are very motivational and men go to them - why don't you?

Go to the GP and ask about counselling. Why not ring the Samaritans? They are there to listen in all sorts of situations. They don't judge, but if you've got stuff you need to unload it might be a good place to start.

You know you need to get some help - take the first step.

[Spade57 in reply to judomum]

Thanks

[Debs2510]

Get yourself some healthy, you can do this.

I understand the 'empty' feeling only too well. It can be very deep seated and it is hard to cope with but you have all of us on here, cheering you on and always someone around to talk to if you need us.

Hope you make the right decision otherwise you will spend the next couple of days beating yourself up about it.

You can do this

Debs

[Caz28]

You've made the first step by posting on here instead of entering the store - a cry for help maybe? You obviously realise the quick fix of food is not the answer, just listen to yourself and reverse the trend, break the cycle, choose something healthy and then enjoy the feeling of pride in yourself. Good luck!

[DRS54]

Rephrasing NIKE: just DON'T do it!!!

[TwentyOver]

You posted a good while ago but I'm hoping you managed to step away. Seriously see your GP as they have some good suggestions for feeling empty. Not necessarily anti-depressants but even those for a while can help cut the circle/spiral. I'm also sending you a macho man hug (or a hefty slap on the back that blokes do).

[Spade57 in reply to TwentyOver]

More like a kick up the #%^* I need 😂

[Fatpanther Restart April 2024]

Hi spade57, light years ago when I had started my first ever job a relative who used to be an insurance salesman came by our house. One of the questions he asked that I would never forget is "before you buy something do you ask yourself; do I need this or do I want it?" I have always used this questioning before buying clothes. And just recently on food and everything else.

Try it it may work for you too. But I think you need something else? You're definitely not alone. I live in constant pain yet hate painkillers so I taken up needle craft as distraction therapy and teaching myself the violin. I used to take my camera out on my twice weekly 5k walks with a friend.

There is more...

[Spade57 in reply to Fatpanther]

Thanks again 😁

[Jacky63]

Hi Spade57. I'm stunned at your courage. When I go into blowout mode my mind disengages from human contact. In the middle of your longing for food you still had the presence of mind to reach out to people. Whether or not you gave in doesn't matter - you interrupted that ritual. In my opinion that's a huge step forward. Hope things are going better for you now.