Spoon life

[Gthants]

Yesterday was supposed to be a running day, but with a show in London, and knowing I'd not be home til midnight, I preserved my energy. So I settled for a bit of yoga, some pilates, meditating in the theatre's quiet space, then stretching on the floor of the green room, as actors are entirely used to the strange behaviour of fellow humans ...

So today was my delayed running day. I got up, did some exercises, got dressed for the run that would follow the school run ... and realised the tank was already nearly empty.

Today feels like the 18 months - 2 years I lived with serious long Covid; the "spoon life" days, when I had to carefully measure out what I was capable of, to the extent of working out what I needed from fridge or cupboard so that I'd make one trip across the kitchen, and save the energy required for the extra few metres that another trip would incur. 🥄

I can/must do pick up from school, but the hour and a half meeting back at school this evening will have to be delegated; the walk down to the high street to collect a parcel will be delayed another day; there'll be no cooking - this is why we freeze meals that can be simply heated up.

I can't run. I can do no more exercises. I can't do the work I really need to do on the next play. I feel like screaming in frustration that I am reduced to this again.

But I'm hoping a day of rest will enable me to bounce back tomorrow. 🤞

[Jools2020]

it must be frustrating for you, but you can’t magic up energy that isn’t there, so listening to your body is the only option. The long day in London clearly left you needing more rest.

Tomorrow is another day! 👍

[CBDB Administrator Graduate Gold]

😢😔

Sending you loads of spoon-free energy wishes! So sorry to read this.

So hoping tomorrow will be a better day for you!

I’m at a conference for 2 nights in Leeds and was hoping to run in the morning. I had everything packed and laid out.

But I’m beginning to realise that I may not be that person that can simply go to a different city and expect to keep my running patterns. Especially after an awful night. I found it hard enough to get my walks in, and it was sooo hot.

So maybe the heat might be interfering with your well-being, as well?

Take care of yourself.

[Gthants Graduate in reply to CBDB]

Yes. It was very hot on train, in London, and in the theatre - as it was open air. I filled my water bottle before I left the theatre ... and it all emptied into my bag, so I had two hours without water on the way home! Heat was draining.

And isn't it always weird in a hotel or different bed? It takes ages to settle and never quite feels like home.

Hope you get to run on your return from Leeds.

[CBDB Administrator Graduate Gold in reply to Gthants]

Will definitely do. Fingers crossed for both of us running any day, now again! .

[SueAppleRun]

Those Spoon days help us appreciate the good days, hoping you only had the one, and that tomorrow is totally better

[Instructor57]

Totally get this, I seem to have an abundance of spoons 😐🤔

[ChannelRunner2]

A, yes, the spoons... Haven't heard a reference to that for a while! I learned about the spoon theory of chronic illness when my hypothyroid medication was "subpar" (as I would learn later... basically, it was crap - the company and its meds were pulled off the market...). It was like some gremlins had stolen some spoons - and it was very helpful to have a way of articulating it.

I hope cooler weather and familiar surroundings were able to refill your spoon-store, Gthants 🤗

(For those curious and not familiar, there's now even a Wikipedia entry on the "spoon theory" with a link to the original: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spoon... )

[Gthants Graduate in reply to ChannelRunner2]

Thanks. This week I lost just a day and a half to it; time was when it would be weeks; so things are looking up!