I feel I'll never be able to quit

Hi MaggieMaybe,

Its nice to meet you gal, my names Pete, i started smoking at about 13 and ended up smoking 40 a day too, i'm on my 5th attempt to quit, using patches and an inhalator for the hard times.

You have come to the right place for help gal, there is loads of help here, just look at some of the blogs and questions etc

I found out that you have to really '' WANT '' to quit to sucseed, and there is always hope for you Maggie believe me, there is always hope

Emjay is the support adviser, she is just brill gal, and i'm sure that it wont be long before she gets intouch with you, good luck

Pete

Hi Maggiemaybe. Pleased to meet you. I`m jillygirl usually first one to open the site in a morning. But Emjay is our advisor and I am positive she will be able to help you. I am 63 and smoked since I was 17. At least 20 a day.

3 months ago I got a chest infection which I could hardly breathe with. I tried to have a ciggy and coughed nearly choked, so I thought to myself what is the point. Not had one since. I use a inhalator just to keep those cravings at bay.

Like Pete says you have come to the right place for support and help, we are all so friendly here and have a laugh on the way. Please join our community I am sure it will help. I would be lost without it.

Whatever you decide keep focused you can do it. xx

Maybe, Pete, I don't want to quit enough. I'm schitzophrenic, want to quit when I'm smoking, don't want to when I'm trying to quit. I think I've maybe tried almost once a year for the last 10 years, every three years or so for the ten years before that, but I'm finding it a lot harder because I'm on my own now.

I think that if I just manage to substitute the ecigs for tobacco ones I'll have done a lot to help my health and my pocket. I've completely given up with NRT, it just doesn't work. I was given patches plus inhalators once. I was using the inhalators non-stop and they made me feel ill plus made the house smell really nasty. That lasted three days then I had to get some shopping on my own and bought some cigarettes as well. That was back in the days when I was part of a couple.

I suppose even smoking a maximum of 10 cigarettes a day for now is better for me than 40. I am finding the ecigs replace most of the real ones so I hope I reach a point where they completly replace them. After that I have a chance because although the nicotine is addictive and there are a lot of other things they don't wean you off, it seems that actually stopping the real cigarettes is the hardest bit for me.

Maggie

Maggie, its just a thought gal, but you say that the inhalator made your house smell nasty !!!! well that may have been due to you getting your smell back, erm how do i explane, erm, rite the first time i quit i lived with my Dad, who didnt smoke, so the house didnt smell of smoke, but !! when i opened my wardrobe it stunk of stale smoke, so i took everything out of it and washed them, job done !!

Just asking do you smoke in the house ?? if so maybe get some nice air fresheners, wash the curtains, so that your house dosnt smell of smoke, like i say gal, just a thought, please dont get me wrong, just trying to help you

Pete

Pete, it wasn't the same smell as cigarettes. Yes I was getting my smell back, even 24 hours later I could smell a cigarette from a way away. At first my husband said that the house smelt better, then he started to ask what the funny smell was. It took a while before I realised it was the same smell as the inhalators. But it was the fact that the inhalators made me feel ill mainly put me off them. I also can't stand menthol, and inhalators have a horrible menthol taste.

In fact my smell is a bit better now than it was, maybe because I'm smoking so little.

Hey Maggie. So much of what you've written is familiar to me, down to only liking one brand (which is why I couldn't use the e-cig because taste was wrong and didn't give the same comfort feel) and again, in regards to the comfort, being a fellow agoraphobia sufferer we need to have safe comfortable zones- places, times, routines, and smoking was certainly my no.1 comfort.

It got so bad that after being admitted into hospital because my lungs were so bad from smoking I still continued to do so- also 40 a day. It wasn't because I needed the nicotine most of the time, it was because I needed the comfort, it was routine, and I was bored! We spend our days in the house because outside is uncomfortable, it's boring, and it makes us depressed to know what we are missing out on.

Read the blog EmJay posted about vivid dreams- depression is caused by seretonin levels being all over the place, and smoking causes the level to drop 50%! No wonder we feel so sad- frustrated, fed up, completely dependent on cigs and other people to help us because we are stuck indoors, I do completely understand.

I got so fed up with my smoking habit using up ALL of my money, feeling completely trapped by smoking that I decided to just stop. I may say the main reason I stopped is because of the finances but in all honesty sure it's saved me £90 a week but it's also the key to freedom- that £90 I save is going on other things that contribute to my freedom, like being able to afford therapy (NHS are awful with agoraphobics makes me so frickin' angry I could spit)!

I haven't smoked for just over two months. My brain is still fighting it but I am fighting back as hard as I can. One of the key things people say when quitting is to change your routine- bit difficult when you're agoraphobic isn't it? I changed it by switching from tea to water, from whenever a craving kicked in to bouncing around my living room screaming, avoiding online gaming, if I watch telly or a movie to keep moving whilst doing so on my exercise bike or cross stitching. It isn't going to be a picnic but if you want to do this you can- like me. I promise.

If you need anything, message me I will be happy to hold your hand through this but please know that you CAN free yourself from smoking *hugs*

Hi again MaggieMaybe,

Welcome to our lovely on-line stop smoking community. I'm sure you'll find everybody quite helpful and most certainly friendly

I'm so glad that you found your way to us and we are all more than happy to help support you in your efforts to stop smoking

As you can see from everybody's replies, there are lots of people rooting for you and some fantastic hints and tips already given. Advice that I think is really, really helpful.

How about you letting us take some of the worries and concerns about stopping smoking away from you for now and get you to look at everything in a different way before encouraging you to set a quit date and have another go?

It sounds as though you have been through so much, especially since losing your husband 6 years ago. I'm so sorry to hear about this as it sounds like it has had such a huge impact on your life.

Sometimes, when stopping smoking, it seems so easy to make the decision to quit but then carrying the task out and staying stopped can be so difficult. If we are not really ready for it, no matter what help and support is available then nothing will help.

Please don't even consider stopping smoking for now, maybe we can get you to stop over the next couple of weeks to a months time. How does that sound?

Let's see if we can find out what you enjoy etc. about smoking and which part of smoking you'll actually miss.

Have a read through the following link and see what you think;

quitsupport.healthunlocked....

Remember MaggieMaybe, there are lots of people going through very similar as yourself and everybody wants to help.

Lets just go back to basics and start from the beginning

Together we can do this and you really, really are not alone. From today onwards, you have many people that you can buddy up with

Hi Lenne. This only wanting one brand is new to me, before I'd smoke anything but menthol because I've never been able to stand the taste. Suddenly I became very fussy because taste became everything.

The agorophobia and the depression started when my husband died and I don't know if it's true agrophobia because I can go out and I don't panic, I just prefer to stay indoors, and it's only been like that for the last 3 years, to some extent when I was still working but had lost my husband, but mostly since I lost my job as well, was made redundant 9 months before state pension age and in this climate at that age it was impossible to find another. I was also virtually housebound for 2 years with a prolapsed disc. The latter has improved a lot since I lost weight and started at the gym.

I've tended to get bronchitis with every cold since I worked with tungsten carbide dust 40 years ago, left that job because of it and so did a few others, but nothing has ever made me feel bad enough to stop smoking. Come to that, in the days when it wasn't banned in hospitals and my mother was in one dying of kidney failure plus pneumonia we had to wheel her bed outdoors so she could smoke. She told me that when I was born the first thing she did was light a cigarette under the blankets, so I lived in a smoking household from birth. In fact my mother gave me my first, my father my second, then they bought them for me, but attitudes in the 60s were differemnt and smoking was a lot cheaper.

Why do I want to quit? I expect my health would improve, I'd not be a social outcast and I could smugly talk about 'filthy. smelly smokers' but mainly because of the cost of cigarettes now the government taxes them so much. I'm also a natural rebel, which means that the more pressure there is to not smoke, the more I want to resist that pressure. Probably it would be easiest for me to quit if everybody was encouraged to smoke!

As for therapy, I had 6 sessions of CBT when I had pivate insurance with a job and it did absolutely nothing to help me.That was just for depression and CBT tries to change your behaviour. Of course I rebelled against it.

So I'm hoping I can free myself but right now I'm not ready to quit completely. I'm smoking over 75% less than I was a few days ago and that's a big step for me. Tomorrow when I go to the gym I'm hoping I'll see more improvement, exercising heart rate and blood pressure down after just a few days last week. I also have to forse myself to go back to the gym twice a week again, I got out of that habit when I was ill for a month and it's proving hard to make the second visit of the week.

I think I'd better stop typing about smoloing, it's making me think I'd like a smoke.

Hi Maggiemaybe, Please let us know how you get on with the gym etc. I think you will get there in your own time.

I am like you as in age wise, like you say in the 60s it was the fashion to smoke. Nobody warned us of the health risks back in those days.

My parent s both smoked and I am sure it doesnt help. Dad died of bowel cancer but it had got to his lungs. he was 72.

Mum died of pneumonia and I would imagine it was related to her smoking. she too was 72.

I know I was scared the last time I had a chest infection. Thats what made me give up. Dont get me wrong if I didnt have the inhalator and this site to log on to there are times I would be going mental.

You take care love and please join us for a chat. If you look through you will notice we dont always talk about smoking. In fact we can be rather silly at times. but its good fun.

Hi Jillygirl.

I've been going to the gym for almost a year now, started after putting on far too much weight when my back was so painful I hardly moved, went on a diet plus gym and lost 2 stone, where I seemed to have stuck. In a few days I put 5 pounds on after months of losing an ounce or so a month, a few days after going to the ecigs. I'd not been eating more and my weight had stayed stable even when I missed gym so don't know if it was a birthday party last Saturday or changing to almost all ecigs. I've justr lost that weight and my cholesterol was way too high so I don't want it back, thought as long as I had nicotine I wouldn't have my metabolism slowing down, it's already too slow.

As I said I get bhronchitis with almost every cold, have done since 4 years of breathing tungsten carbide and cobalt dust at work, but I could only claim for an industrial disease if I'd never smoked and maybe if my parents hadn't either. I've just managed to convince a doctor that so many non-smokers dropped out of that job with brhoncitis that I got an x-ray, luckily normal. I was stupid when I got a virus in February and didn't go for antibiotics, it seemed it came back for two weeks out of every three for almost 3 months, so evenyually it took three different antibiotics to clear it. That did scare me enough to cut down my smoking for a little while - usually I smoke more if I get bronchitis, but soon I was back up to my normal amount.

Now I've never been fussy about brands until I'd been using the ecigs for a week. I found that there was only one brand I liked the taste of, so maybe it's taste that's my thing now?

My mother's death was unrelated to her smoking, it was caused by a post-operative infection. My father, he had a stroke - a bleed - so that wasn't related and because he was confined to a wheelchair after and his second wife practically kept him a prisoner to make sure he didn't smoke I sometimes wonder if the lung cancer he died of was caused by suddenly stopping cold turkey from 60 a day.

I worry about heart failure because one of the pills I take for my bad back can cause it, but since starting at the gym my resting heart rate has dropped from mid-70s to between 52 and 65, My blood pressure drops when I go to the gym regularly but since starting the ecigs it's a fairly healthy 112/70 which I don't think is too bad for somebody in their 60s taking nothing for blood pressure or cholesterol.I can't take statins anyway, they make me really ill even if I only take a single one.

I think I've acheived something because I've had no more than 10 cigarettes a day for the last week and am hoping that I'll use the ecigs more and the real ones less until I'm only using ecigs. Believe it or not, I feel healthier and can smell better just by cutting down by over 75% and I think that's proved by the gym because I can do more for longer with my pulse rate staying lower. I've added an extra 5 minutes to my 6 km/hr treadmill for instance, which makes a total of 20 minutes, mostly uphill, and I'm not tired when I finish. I'll let you know how I get on tomorrow if you're interested. Maybe soon I'll be able to buy a device that tells me how many calories I burn using weights, I only get that for the treadmill and cycle now.

True, I haven't quit but I feel that I'm getting there even though my will power is close to zero and I have no supportive friends. I have introduced my best friends to the ecigs, one hasn't touched tobacco for nearly a week, the other uses roll-ups more than ecigs but is using them. They've both tried many times to quit without success.

I'm also a little better off in spite of £100 to stock up on ecig cartridges for the next few months. I'm only spending around £20 a week on cigarettes now, I used to spend £90 or more.

I should warn everbody, people always complain that I write books instead of emails.

Hi Maggiemaybe

i just wanted to come and say hey, Ive had a good few attempts at quitting over the years and each attempt i seemed to last for shorter periods of time.. infact my last attempt lasted less than 24 hours!!my first cigarette was at the age of 13 and im now 36!!

about 10 years ago I started having breathing problems,initially I thought it was just my childhood asthma affecting me after a cold. However it got worse and they decided that I had COPD due to the smoking,after further investigation it turned out it wasnt that it was a heart failure and my lungs were not working properly! I was advised to stop smoking..Do you know I left that appointment and got in the car and literally chain smoked all the way home.. you would think that the news of having heart failure would be enough to stop me smoking!! Over the next year or so i tried patches gum you name it I tried it... but all the while i felt like i was being forced to give up by the doctors not because I wanted to... so I carried on smoking.. every morning I would get up and take my steroids,and loads of other tablets my inhalers and then have a cigarette..half the time i couldnt even enjoy it for not being able to breath! I have since recovered,I still am on medication and I still have to take my inhalers religiously,but am alot better than I have been in the last 9 years.

I too would only smoke one brand of menthol,and if my local shop didnt have them I had been known to walk a 4 mile round trip just to go to the garage I knew that sold them!! I have always joked if they actually stopped making that brand I would never smoke again..however that was never going to happen.

one my last quit attempt I physicked myself up for weeks counting down the days and had agreed to quit with 2 friends so we could do it together and support eachother.we planned to go to the local quit smoking group,which we did... the lady was fantastic and let us all have our appointment together,she gave us a talk and did our carbon monoxide reading and we left with our patches gum and armed full of leaflets and plenty of will power... except my will power lasted about 16 hours!! I felt so defeated but I soon got back to smoking, that was 3 years ago.of my 2 friends one hasnt smoked since that day,whilest my other friend is just thinking of quitting now, and then theres me!!

ive been now smoke free for 10 days 14 hours and 16 mins according to the app on my phone. i had been thinking of quitting for a little while,but probably wasnt all that serious then one day I went to go and pick up my perscription from the chemist and seen they did the NHS stop smoking.. I just thought why not . They asked me to go back in a couple of hours, honestly I wasnt sure if Id go back but I did..we spoke a little about why I was there and he then suggested I used patches and the minis.. he also asked me about my will power on a scale of 0 to 10 and I circled 3 and that was me being brave because honestly my will power be it for giving up smoking or chocolate or anything really is pretty much a zero..

I didnt believe I could do it,..I really didnt but I AM doing it.. it hasnt been easy,however stumbling onto this site has been the best thing that could have happened, the support you get is amazing, knowing that there are other people that are knowing exactly how I feel and can give me support is amazing..If I need to ask anything I can and someone always replies..

For me this site is invaluable in keeping me going.

wow I seemed to have written some type of mini book here so I shall sign off in a mo..but I wanted to say even with the will power of almost zero,with the support from people of this site,and going hour by hour I'm even surprising myself!! You really have come to the right place for when your ready to start your quit journey...

Hello MaggieMaybe,

You are not on your own any more, EmJay will be able to help you and the rest of us will encourage you too. I also think you are very brave, open and honest and think you've made a big step choosing to stop smoking.

I am 41 and was the only smoker in my entire family. I started smoking at aged 13 and managed to stop through both pregnancies but any small reason would return to smoking. When my children got to teenage years I was so worried that they would take up smoking.

I always thought being strong enough to be a non smoker would just be a fantasy, as being addicted to nicotine is hard. Its a trap and once you've fallen for it, it seems so hard to imagine breaking the chain.

Wishing you all the luck and determination to find a way that is right for you to stop. We are all different but all have had the same problem.

I have been smoke free for 4 months now. I see it as all positive and feel my teeth are clean, my breath is nicer and some how I feel taller. At 5 foot 4 .... and being a bit of a short arse, feeling taller (self esteem) is all a bonus.

I know I sound positive and everything is so rosy but I also battle with depression. I've made some changes this time, I now no longer drink alcohol and as soon as I started to feel out of control emotionally went to the doctors and have seeked the help I needed before I had months off work sick again. I do feel much better and am so chuffed that I have not gone back to smoking whilst feeling low.

Try not to think as stopping smoking as a will power battle, if you can sort out the not smoking in your mind your body will follow suit ... whatever method works for you... congratulations for taking this step and we are all behind you.

Lisa-Jane, good for you, you're doing well! I don't know if it's harder the longer you've been smoking but it seems to be a personal thing, what works for one person doesn't work for another.

Most of your past attempts were a lot better than mine, apart from the 5 days and 3 days the rest have been between 24 hours and 2 hours and 2 hours is nothing, went longer than that when working.

I've always hated the taste of mentrhol which is maybe one reason why me and inhalators never agreed with me. Until I had the ecigs a few days I'd smoke anything if it wasn't menthol, could never stand them, although always preferred those labelled low tar, low nicotine. It's only in thje last few days I've found I can only smoke one brand, it happened gradually and maybe one day I'll find I don't like them either. I've read of people swapping to ecigs and finding they don't like real ones anymore after a few weeks. In fact I'd not mind too much if I could just move completely to the ecigs, no toxins, no carcinogens, nothing burning and I know exactly what's in them, these aren't Chinese imports, they've been analysed. Even with them I'd be losing the dangers and saving a lot of money unless the government decides to either ban them or charge as much as real cigarettes.

I do worry about my heart because I have to take an NSAID that can cause heart failure but apparently my lungs are in good condition in spite of being prone to bronchitis.

I can't use any oral NRT because of the problems NSAIDS have caused to my stomach, I've tried patches, tried inhalators and tried both together. I think a lot of it is motivation and I have this weird thing I developed in childhood of always doing the opposite of what I was told so probably the easiest way to get me to quit would be to make it unacceptable not to smoke and have smokers insult non-smokers. As for carbon monoxide levels, I had one test with almost zero carbon monoxide when smoking, a non-smoker got a lecture about how she should quit once, and I have lower carbon monoxide if I've just chain-smoked three than if I've not smoked for over an hour, so I don't trust it. There's a lot in the atmosphere, especially on busy roads. But I know that you feel healthier, breathe better and smell and taste better when you don't smoke, plus it saves you a shedload of money.

So as my will-power is very low and I don't have many things to put in the 'advantages' column of quitting, my plan is to cut down on tobacco and replace with the substitute for now. All I need is to start finding that I don't like the taste of cigarettes and some people have said that's happened to them.

It does seem easier for me not to smoke when I know I have a pack but I just don't think about lighting one. After all I'm still giving my body enough nicotine, it's just that it's delivered in another way.

But if you are anything like me, and you sound that you are, then I truly congratulate you and say to keep it up!

Once I had a misdiagnosis and was told I'd lose both legs if I didn't quit instantly. I'd never smoked more before or since! Luckily the coctor was wrong, tests proved that.

Hi Maggie - just joined this site. I started smoking when I was 23; probably 20 a day of normal cigs. For the last two years or so I have been smoking roll up tobacco, using a machine to help me roll it. I have found that by changing to tobacco it has helped me considerably to cut down and now only smoke 6-10 a day - the beauty of this is that you need only take a few puffs, put it down, do things and then if you need a puff or two again it is there and waiting!! It is of course the number of puffs you take when smoking, which doesnt help. There is pure tobacco on the market now but can only be bought in proper tobacco shops; I tried one of them but it was very strong. However there is a milder type out there which I have yet to try. I am also feeling lately that my urges are not quite as strong as they used to be. I am 71 now but still fit and reasonably healthy. Have always worked hard and walked everywhere as never had a car - get treats when my daughter turns up in hers though!! This may or may not help you but it has helped me. I havent really had time to read all of what you have said, so forgive me if I have jumped in at the wrong moment as maybe you have now clinched it - well done if so. xx

I've not been on here for months because I found the support I needed and the thing that suited me. I'm still using nicotine but I'm no longer smoking. I bought ego ecig batteries, clearomisers and initially one of the highest strength liquids and found flavours I love. None are tobacco. Now I have developed what ecig people (I count myself one now and call myself a vaper, not a smoker) call 'shineyitis'. It's completly safe, a desire to collect nice, shiny equipment to provide the vapour. Right now I have a Lavatube,chrome tube about 15 cm long with four buttons and an LED display I can turn on to check what voltage I use (higher it is, more warmer vapour) and how much battery I have left and I've just ordered a Vamo (variable voltage and wattage). I have ego batteries and use them when I go out because I get some strange looks with the big things. None of them look anything like cigarettes and although some people are able to stop smoking the moment they start using ecigs, I did it slowly, found I just didn't want to smoke although when a smoker friend offers me one I'n still tempted to accept. For that reason I gave all of my smoker friends,including one with COPD who knows she has to quit so now uses Niquitin minis, roll-ups and tailor-made cigarettes plus a lookalike ecig bought at the local garage, a basic ecig kit of the type that got me off the cigarettes. No pressure, just 'give it a go'. I did get stares and was instructed to put out my little ecigarette I started with sometimes although I always ask and explain before vaping in a 'no smoking area. Once a woman held her nose and told me to quit the filthy habit and my response was to place the 'lighted' end against my skin. She nearly fainted, but as I wasn't smoking and feeling very pleased with myself for quitting she annoyed me.My GP now classes me as a non-smoker but I do get an urge at times, mostly first thing in the morning. So I use a higher nicotine content then and try to delay my first vape as I used to light up as soon as I got up.

The ecigs worked for me and as I'm not inhaling any burnt material, plus I'm using the same nicotine as that in NRT, only much purer than the Quickmist spray (I read the ingredients of one and was horrified) I'd like to be completly free of everything one day. But even if it's only a way to reduce harm that@s OK with me because I don't think I'd ever have been able to quit without them.

I am absolutely terrified if they are banned by the new EU Tobacco Control Directive. I can't understand why they want to either allow them with no, or next to no, nicotine, and wait several years for the big NRT sellers get medicine licenses. The UK is the only country in the EU that has strict regulation on these, but they could be banned and that would stop a rapidly growing way that people who want to stop smoking but have been unable to with any approved method from quitting, and possibly add a lot of ex-smokers back to the tobacco market. Although some who've been using ecigs for a year or more say they felt no need for anything, could easily give up vaping, unlike cigarettes,, so who knows?

Hi MaggieMaybe, how lovely to hear from you. I'm sorry I'm only just replying to your post but it has only shown up via the e-mail notifications and not on the main page. I'm just ging through all the missed notifications now

So happy to hear that you are still quit and that using the e-cigarette is working really well for you. They've helped quite a few of our members to quit so far.

How long have you quit for now?

As long as you are not smoking, I'm sure that using NRT or e-cigarettes has got to be tonnes safer for you than smoking.

Keep up the good efforts

I cut down using e-cigs starting in July, never intended to stop everything bevcause I knew I couldn't do it, too many failures in the past.

I've not smoked a cigarette in 4 months and although I do sometimes want one in the morning I'm fine after a few minutes. For me what most people call e-cigarettes have been a life-saver, maybe literally as I got bronchitis every time I caught a cold and was getting short of breath. Medical quit drugs and NRT didn't work for me because I enjoyed some of the cigarettes, but this does as although I use a shiny metal tube that looks more like a musical instrument now, partly because I am proud of myself for managing to quit after 50 years of heavy smoking and the devices that look like cigarettes were often mistaken for them, so I bought one that doesn't.

I've managed to persuade two friends to quit the same way, two more have cut down their smoking, and this isn't much easier than using NRT.

I had all the recognised tobacco withdrawal symptoms, but made it through.

I don't know if the fact that the drug companies only offer menthol or menthol as flavouring in inhalators was one of the reasons why I only managed 3 days with them, because I don't like mint and loathe menthol, but during that 3 day period all (I managed was a milds nicotine overdose.

Now I've found something that works and is a lot safer than smoking, I hear that the EU plan to ban electronic cigarettes. They are very tightly regulated in the UK so I know I'm using something that is 99% safer than smoking and doesn't pollute or affect others.

When I heard the announcement of the new draft EU Tobacco Control Directive I was so shocked I slipped and smoked a cigarette, knocked on my neighbour's door and asked for one.

How can any relulatory authority ban something that works to stop many people smoking but allow smoking cigarettes?