So a few of you know that I was going really well when it came to quitting. Then last month I messed up and started again. I thought NRT would help but actually it’s been dragging me down and I tend to smoke real cigarettes on occasion. Myself and my wife have been trying for a kid and this smoking thing is really dragging us both down. I want to really give up, but the brainwashing element is really strong. Does anyone have any advice on how to stop those urges and stay strong? Because right now I haven’t felt so weak in my life.
I have listened to the Allen Carr stop smoking book 2 times and the first time it helped a lot. Then when i screwed up listening to it again didn’t have the same effect
I need to do this for myself and my wife.
Written by
DarrienKG
LONG TERM WINNER
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Darrien, keep trying, I can't tell you how many times I quit or tried to quit but keep trying! I am nearly 1 year smoke free after over 40 years of addiction. You have to do this for yourself, remember that, do it for you. This community made the difference for me, having someone to encourage and understand is wonderful. Best of luck to you. You can do this.
Alongside your physical addiction is also the mental one. I didn’t truly come to terms with quitting until I’d sorted that out. A good 6 months!.
My first quit was when I fell pregnant with my first child... I spent 10 years being an on off smoker while my friends stayed quit. It was horrible to be fair. Keep thinking of the baby that you both want and hold onto positive thoughts. Running really helps me.... I’m not fast or really brilliant at it but it gets me out with my thoughts and it used to keep me away from smoking. Now I focus on looking after my body, heart and lungs by keeping it moving and staying fit and hopefully being around longer for the family now I’m quit.
Find something other that just quitting to focus on. Come on here and shout and cry... or laugh and celebrate, the best thing I did was come on here, the support is amazing!!!.
You can do this. Most of us thought we couldn’t quit to begin with and some of us it takes a long time to finally quit for good. Just keep on trying.... you will get there😃
If you really want to do it for your family .. then you will do it .. no more listening of excuses of weak mind and nic speaking ... right .
Sorry Darrien .. if I sounded rude .. the message I wanted to convey that .. this is the way you should speak to yourself .. ..
I am not going to smoke again .. fullstop .
All those methods , support and encouragement will help you .. when you are strong and committed to quit . (I am not doubting that you are not) .
So make this attempt as life and death situation.. put all willpower , courage you have to this quit .
And we are here to help you when you feel weak .. that old ugly Nic is nothing in front of human willpower.. the power which has made us to reach moon .. alter mountain .. so go for it..
give it everything you have ... the victory is yours 👍👍
Hi it took me 44 years of heavy smoking and mild copd to get me to quit! Now it's the fear of the disease progressing which keeps me stopped.
I have lost count of the many times I tried and used everything - champix, zyban, acupuncture, hypnotherapy, patches, inhalotor, cold turkey.
It wasn't until I lurked in here for a couple of months soaking up all the positive messages that I tried again.
Now I am on 9 months and loving it. My dreadful chronic cough has gone, I am less breathless, have more money, my friends are happy coz I no longer stink of ciggies, but most of all I have given myself a future which I am still trying to get my head round as I was convinced and almost reconciled to smoking killing me!
You can do this and we are behind you all the way. x
That was good Grim sometimes we need someone to tell us to toughen up I know I do. You got this Darrien walks filling my head with the sights I see takes away any thoughts of Nic we are here if you need us.😊
You've been given great advice in answer to your post - all of us have struggled to one degree or another. Some of us still are - but really want to do this for ourselves, however hard. Although it's wonderful that you want to do it for your wife, it's really important that YOU want to do it for YOURSELF. If you do it for someone else, you can become resentful, and feel you're being denied your fix by someone else. This will tempt you back to smoking.
So think about all the advantages stopping smoking will give you, and you alone - and the rest will slowly fall into place.
Hi Darrien, Please have a really good read through the pinned posts. Make yourself a plan , set a quit date and stick to it. Be prepared, whether you use nrt. or read the books.
Get some nibbles at hand preferably healthy ones. Change your routine and where you would light up, do something different keep busy. Throw away any tobacco and tobacco related items i.e. lighters matches ashtrays cigarettes etc. Dont be tempted to buy any more. Save your money and watch it grow.
Try think of cigarettes as sticks of poison that really do harm to your body.
I’ve tired so many times to quit, I’ve tried NRT, Allen Carr x 2, Easyway for Woman x 1 (not that different from the original), ‘Smokers anonymous’ as I called it, a group of smokers trying to quit, a bit like this but in person, cutting down, abstaining, hiding the cigs, keeping cigs at my friends house, you name it I’ve been there. I truly believe each attempt helped to permanently knock down a brick from the wall of denial and now it’s about getting rid of the rest of the wall, permanently. In preparation I’ve started listening to mindfulness sessions which is about training the mind to help with the cravings. Everyone’s got to find the right way for them but I think this group is a fantastic support, even if you’re only reading other people’s posts to get encouragement and inspiration.
You can do this, and everyone’s here to support each other be strong.
hey everyone, thank you all so much for the great feedback and even hard truths have really helped me a lot. Since my last post I am yet to give in. My boss has tried tempting me a lot over the last week by saying things like "I hate people who quit" he even brought me a pack of Camels. I took them and then when he wasnt looking I put them in the bin.
I feel stronger after that moment. Im only 10 days in but Its a start.
Wow, that’s not a good attitude from your boss.... he’ll regret those words. Forget everyone else’s opinions other than people who are positive, this will lift you and make you feel good. Negative people are just no help!.
Well done so far, you’re doing fantastic!! Stay strong and determined and you will succeed 💪🏼💪🏼🚭🚭
Hi Darrien, great to hear your news, 10 days smokefree is good going. I will amend your badge to reflect this. Don't let anyone try to thwart you, that's just pure jealousy and selfishness on their part.
Keep reminding yourself the poisoning that is going through your system with the 4000 chemicals that a cigarette delivers. That’s what I do. Fear is my motivator
Keep trying Darrien!!!!!! Even if you slip up!!!!!
Thanks you guys I’m still smoke and nic free. I feel fantastic, however I am a little worried about the upcoming weekend as Friday night is my annual sleep over at work. Myself and my co worker are the only ones here and too pass the time we would chat and have a cig on the roof. I’m worried I will be tempted.
As I mentioned before he is the one who is always trying to make me slip up and a lot of the time pressure gets the best of me....
I am not craving but I’m fearing that night. I need to stay strong.
Your mention of a baby really struck with me as that's what's driving both my desperate want to swap and also my keeping going with it as unfortunately it wasn't meant to be for me this time.
Stopping is always possible if it's the right time for you and your mind. I know for some, the thought of baby (whether you're trying to be/are a mummy or a daddy) is enough to be their help support through stopping smoking. I know for me that as I've always used smoking as a way of dealing with stress/difficult feelings, the normal worries and thoughts of pregnancy meant that it increased my cravings and "need" for cigarettes. It entirely depends on finding the right way of quitting for you. For me at the moment, taking the focus off the baby and towards a more general, healthy lifestyle is taking the pressure off a little so actually reducing the things that make me turn to cigarettes more...if my convoluted reasoning makes any sense!!
Take it one cigarette at a time - when you want or need one, tell yourself that at this moment in time you are not a smoker and you don't need it right now. If in 5/10/whatever time you set yourself, you still feel the need to smoke then reassess and see if you're able to tell yourself again you are a non smoker. Someone I know, when they quit successfully, swore by defining them self as a non-smoker right from the moment they quit rather than "trying to cut down/trying to quit" because that definition made it easier.
Apologies for the essay and if anything comes across as negative or bad in any way - it's all meant supportively and with the best of intentions.
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well I admit to doing a bit of head banging in my youth! Now it just gives me a headache 
x
Trying again hopefully for good this time
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