I felt like I was doing good! Like I'd got over the worst part.
I have been feeling angry or rather quick to anger. The only way I can describe it is it's like when I'm tired and hungry and things that wouldn't bother me suddenly make me furious. That's been a constant and something I have been dealing with and as time has gone on it's got better and easier.
Last night I had a disappointing workout at the gym (most days I leave the gym feeling amazing). For some reason I ended up feeling angry, irritable and depressed. My fiancee tried very hard to make me happy (feeding me when I got home etc...) but I was stuck in a bad mood, even screaming at her chinchilla for chewing on my door frame (we let her out to run around, and the chewing is a common thing which requires her being given a little tap on the bottom to remind her not to... she has an obsession with one side of one door frame).
Does anyone else experience days/evenings/times with such high levels of the symptoms of quitting?
I thought that being this far in i'd be passed the worst of it as things have generally got a lot easier and better this last week. Last night I just went a bit crazy.
I'm feeling better this morning and apologized to my wonderful fiancee multiple times for being so difficult last night and thanked her for her patience and support. We are going to visit her family for a few days which I find stressful, they are lovely (I couldn't ask for better future in-laws) but I don't speak their language (I'm learning it at a snails pace) which frustrates me. I need to make sure I keep self control as I don't wish to spoil any time with them through being an unreasonable angry/grumpy idiot.
P.S. I love this place, it's so amazing to be here and vent/express my feelings to people who truly understand what I'm going through and how I feel. The support is amazing! Thanks to all of you! It's strange how my days are brighter because someone I barely know online has said something helpful and/or encouraging.
Written by
DavidH83
3 YEAR WINNER
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Hiya David, you felt you were doing good and YOU ARE doing good but everyone of us has days when we don't feel so good. Sometimes it's just a few little things that build on top of each other to make us anxious or angry. you really wouldn't feel any better if you had a cig but you just think you would. a few stressful events are ahead and this is probably what you're worrying about but you are doing fantastic. Just remind yourself how far you've come and be proud. Lots of deep breathing and enjoy your vist coz I bet those inlaws will be so proud of you too. It will get easier but as with life, not every day is easy. But you can do it 😀 x
Hi David , you have done amazingly well. I think we will have reminders from time to time. My hubby quit 10 years ago and he says that he still occasionally gets the urge for a cigarette.
try not to beat yourself up, and you start feeling angry or frustrated , try and see all the positives of your fantastic quit 😀😃😀😃
It's not so much the urge for a cigarette well vape... I feel I'm on top of those. I want one and I know I'm not going to let myself have one. So I get on with things.
This was just an outbreak of the anger/depression that I have had with quitting. It's strange as feeling that way I didn't want to vape, I know it was a result of the withdrawal that I felt that way but I didn't psychologically associate the sensations of depression/anger with smoking.
The main times that I want to vape are actually:
1: Drinking (beer in one hand, missing something in the other).
2: Thinking (at work or at home trying to work out a plan/solution).
3: Sometimes watching TV in the evening (often if someone in the show/film starts smoking), as that was a time I'd sit and vape a lot.
I'm sure there are subtleties for me quitting the e-cig rather than regular cigarettes. I'm glad I didn't get back on those, I found quitting those (5 years ago now I think, that I quit from a regular 10 - 20 a day habit).
Sorry to hear you're having a tough time. I hope our conversations haven't reignited any latent deep seated urges. If you can accommodate my recent findings, I suspect circumstances have elevated your cortisol levels &, in the absence of your pressure relief valve, the cortisol levels rise with every insignificant annoying incident until you react to the sum total, rather than each individually. I believe your pressure relief valve was not cigarettes or ecigs but the act of smoking. You've probably developed other coping mechanisms in the time since you quit. Maybe our recent discussions have put the old pathways back into the picture. Your description of your recent situation sounds incredibly familiar to me & my battles. I know you have the knowledge & wherewithal to get over this hump.
Hi David. You are not alone, and I have had those rages too, I'm sure lots of us have on here!!
Remember how great you're doing! You are being really strong, hat off to you!
I found getting away, walking driving doing anything different helped most. A rage can get to be a sort of spiral that draws you tighter and tighter in if you don't slug through the webs, and fight your way out by snapping the brain set. Even, in my case going off for some wild exerting dancing in a room alone. Cant beat a bit of rick music Yep! Crazy!! But crazy feelings sometimes need crazy solutions
Sorry for the disappearance, I'm on holiday with my Fiancée visiting her family in Romania!
The change of scenery has made most of the time most days easier. With one exception, sometimes when we are with friends of hers who are smoking all I can think of is my desire to smoke. This goes on in my head and becomes a serious craving where I'm clenching my teath and fists and fidgeting like a 6 year old child in church.
I haven't given in. Everyone has been supportive especially my Fiancée! Although I can't wait for this country to enact a public smoking ban similar to the UK (it's on its way).
So far so very good.
I'm working on the pathways and thinking of other things to do with my spare time other than wedding planning.
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in a room alone. Cant beat a bit of rick music 
Starting to feel a bit better now
Day 9 progress....LAST NIGHT WAS TERRIBLE!
Day Six and dealing with emotions.
Daily Chat: Tuesday 26th February 2013
