Day Six and dealing with emotions.: It's hard... - Quit Support

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Day Six and dealing with emotions.

14 Replies

It's hard to not think of smoking when my daughter is hurting so much that she cut her own arm a multitude of times. I want to take her pain from her and at the same time, I am angry that she has hurt herself. I battered my NRT (spraying my mouth every 10 minutes) But I didn't smoke, it's a miracle I didn't. Can't say I feel proud of myself because I feel other things like why does my daughter self harm? I feel a bit of a failure as a parent.

I ask my self 'Will lighting up make this situation Better?' and the answer is 'No' So for the moment I choose not to smoke. I am just soooo glad that I have NRT and a support group like this.

14 Replies
sue52 profile image
sue523 YEAR WINNER

Hi Andrea, I'm so sorry your daughter is self harming, but like mad said, it's not your fault. I can only begin to imagine the stress you must be under but smoking will not make it go away, I think you've done brilliantly not to smoke, it shows what a strong person you are, you can get through this smoke free. I really hope your daughter can get the professional help that she needs, stay strong, you will both get through this :)

in reply to sue52

Thanks Sue. xx

thenunn profile image
thenunn

Andrea I'm so sorry to hear of your daughters problem..it is no reflection on you as a parent,you must believe that..sadly some people self harm to relieve things,just like some drink and some smoke and some eat etc. PLEASE stay strong you have done and are doing so well..and as the others have said having one will not solve anything..in fact it will add to your woes because you will feel bad for having had it and letting yourself down.

Things will improve..your daughter knows you are there and hopefully she will get help.

Lots of positive thoughts cyber higs to you and your daughter.x :)

in reply to thenunn

Thanks Jan. xx

andi22 profile image
andi22

Hi Andrea, you're doing really well despite all your problems. Nearly up to a week now and look how you've managed to cope with everything without those white sticks. :) Do they really help us? I think you have proved that we really do not need them to help to relieve our daily stresses - on the contrary, I think you prove that they actually add to our daily stresses. You will get through this, you are a very strong person and we are all here to help support you when you need it. :)

in reply to andi22

Thanks Andi. xx

EmJay profile image
EmJayPartner

Hey Andrea, how are you feeling now? You are doing the right thing by remembering that you have a choice and you are making the right one. It's not that you can't smoke, you can... It's just that you are choosing not to.

Remember that you are choosing to stop doing something that you no longer want to do....

With regards to your concern for your daughter, I'm sure there is help and support for families of people who self harm. Let me know whether or not you know of anywhere and if not, I'll get you some details.

Big smiles, your heading in the right direction :D

in reply to EmJay

Thanks EmJay. xx

magpie363 profile image
magpie36320 Months Winner

Hi Andrea I am so sorry to hear about your daughter. I would just like to echo was others have said it is not a reflection on you as a parent. You have been remarkabley strong and as you said the cigs would not have made it any better. This has been very inspirational for me as I will think this if I am tempted to light up. Thank you for your post. Sending warm wishes and good thoughts to you and your daughter. Hang on in there xx

Linda

in reply to magpie363

Thanks Linda. xx

Thank you John. xx

Jo2012 profile image
Jo2012

Keep going your making a big positive change.Please do let yourself feel proud.I hope I can find the strength you have x

Arizona- profile image
Arizona-26 Months Winner

Sending love and support to you and your daughter from Canada 🇨🇦

There’s a very intensive program here for people who self harm . Great success rate ... xxxxx

I'm sorry about your daughter hon.. but I have a granddaughter does the same.. and you didn't do nothing wrong..we have took her to the best of phycologist and she still cuts..my heart goes out to you ❣️💞

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