3 days off 2 months

[Muddles]

So I'm 3 months quit altho 2 for completely smoke free if I'm gonna be picky. For those that don't know me I quit a couple of days before Christmas but had a couple of sly smokes New Year's Eve then a few drags of my ex partner's up until January (you can figure out my badges emjay!)...far out someone stop me going to buy some tonight!! I hate being n a diff time zone :(. You're all asleep

[KC1946]

I'm awake you know you will regret it if you buy some so deep breath and get in the shower or soak in the bath. You are doing so well. It must be hard being in a different time zone but my sleeping patterns are not good so I am sometimes around in the middle of the night. On a different note I won £156.00 on the lottery last night to add to my ciggy savings. x

[jillygirl Administrator Queen Bee in reply to KC1946]

Well done with your lottery win. I didnt win but I won £25 on premium bonds. Have a good day. xx

[Kaprin in reply to KC1946]

Oh fantastic love hearing people winning something well done, put it towards a much deserved holiday x

[jillygirl Administrator Queen Bee]

Hi Mardi, Hope your ok. your doing fine dont go and spoil it. treat yourself to some goodies instead.

[Muddles 10 MONTH WINNER in reply to jillygirl]

Shit shit shit no I'm not ok ( sorry about language). I have no money he bled me dry and then I worked out today that I won't get a rental till I send my beautiful Labrador back to live with my parents as there is nowhere here in tassie within my very limited budget that will take a dog as well. She is the last bit of comfort I have here. So the bastard wins again. He's now taken everything that I had and loved from me. The fact that I can't keep my dog feels like the last straw. I won't smoke. But shit it's a case of why the f%#$& not.

[Pinkiezoom 26 Months Winner in reply to Muddles]

Mardi hun, stay strong, we are in similiar situations indeed, looks like i cant rent anywhere down here in my price bracket and take my cats .... i cant give them to the cats protection league as they are my family, what a mess. I dont have anyone who can take them, at least your pooch will be with your family, so you can visit etc. He hasnt won hun, he doesnt have you....and karma is a beautiful thing. Stay strong xx

[Kaprin in reply to Pinkiezoom]

You too my friend and you are so right about karma x

[Kaprin in reply to jillygirl]

Hey well done you, fantastic x

[EmJay Partner]

Hey Mardi, let's help you keep this part of your life that we know you have the most control of xx

You're midway of coming through a real tough time but with a wing and a prayer, lots of friends on here, you will come through this.

If your parents can take care of your lovely pup for you, then although it's not an ideal situation for you,it's a huge help. You'll also be able to move onto the next step of getting yourself sorted then.

Going back to smoking now will change a few things for you;

1. Will cost you money that you could use else where.

2. Will be an additional stress that you could most certainly do without at the minute.

3. How you feel towards yourself for giving up at this point.

Staying smokefree will help;

1. Financially - to gain the pennies to live a better lifestyle and set up a new home.

2. Keep your sanity and not have to worry on having to look after a habit / addiction as well as just taking care of your lovely self.

3. Give you that sense of empowerment. Smoking or not smoking is your choice. Making choices is something that you can have control over. Choosing not to smoke will bring a better lifestyle for you. Choosing to smoke may send you consequences that you won't want to or won't have a choice but to deal with.

Mardi, you are a lovely person, although you don't want to be in the position you are now, life will get better for you eventually. You are on that track now.

We're all alongside you along the way

[mrssunnyside]

Hi Mardi, Well EmJay has said it all. Remember the word ' Empowerment ' use it, make it work for YOU, you've already used it re the ciggies.

Thinking of you, and sending good luck vibes to you. X.

[Kaprin]

Mardi he has not own, he has lost you forever, keep strong my friend think positive you will get there and smoking defo won't help, you start smoking and he has own, don't give him the satisfaction of seeing that, it is a shame we are on different time zones but never forget we are all with you and I am sending massive hugs your way my friend also to pinkie zoom, things always happen for a reason my friend and all will become apparent soon enough you are loved by this community so not on your own not the same I know but nevertheless said with sincerity, it's good to be alive, good to see the sunshine, good to see nature and the movement of water, great to see lungs improving and getting rid of Mr Nic always here if you need me or us! X x x x

[Muddles 10 MONTH WINNER]

I just want to say thank you to you all. I'm pretty well done tho. On top of my recent breakup some very tragic news. My ex husband (married for 22 years before recent relationship. Plus father to my three beautiful children) dropped dead this morning In front of my son of a massive heart attack. I've got nothing. I'm truly devStated along with my children. I had a smoke today with my son. I don't think there's much left to life. I'm done. Thank you all. Good bye xxx

[Pinkiezoom 26 Months Winner in reply to Muddles]

Mardi!!!!! MARDI!!!!!!!!!

No one can blame you for having a smoke, but please don't leave the site, things seem black and impossible at the moment, but brighter days are coming, sometimes life throws everything at us to make way for more beautiful paths that we couldn't see before. Why not lean on the friends you have made here as well as the others you have in the real world?

Thinking of you and sending you massive love xx

[Muddles 10 MONTH WINNER]

Al I can't keep being strong. I'm tired. He died. My kids are broken. I'm broken I don't see the point of really anything anymore. My babies are devastated. And I live in a different state to them. Time I started being a mummy. I have to move back to the mainland. I'm all they have now. What a bastard. How dare he drop dead like that. My poor son jack.....such a beautiful young man now destroyed. He will never get over this. My life is insignificant now. Oh my god And I'm sorry but yes I had a smoke. It doesn't matter anymore. I'm sorry guys. Thank you for all of your love in the past. I wish you nothing but success xxx

[Pinkiezoom 26 Months Winner in reply to Muddles]

Mardi, of course your son will get over this, children are so much stronger than we give them credit for. My son lost his father at 7, and yes the devastation is incredible and the pain seems insamountable, but the truth is, time is a healer, sounds contrived and empty right now, but how can you say your life is worth nothing now... it is suddenly worth double what it was before, you now have to be mum and dad to your children, a challenge i think will be both rewarding and time consuming, before you know it you will all be settled, life will be turning around, I know it feels pointless right now, i remember that feeling too, watching my son crumble before me, but he is 21 next month, and you know what, as bizaar as this may sound, we are better people for coming through the tragedy of my husband being killed. You have much bigger issues than quitting smoking right now, but you dont have to leave the site, you can lean on us here for anything, you know that. Trust me things will take a turn for the better honey, I swear they will xx

[monky Administrator Cake sniffer outer in reply to Muddles]

Hi Mardi, am so so sorry gal

So your at rock bottom now, soooo, things can only get better from now on eh I would have had a smoke ages ago with the things you have gone through Mardi, I tell you !!

You get back to the Mainland and be with your family cos you all need each other now. Please please don't leave us eh, keep popping on here now and again to let us know how you are We will always be here to help you if we can

Sending you loads of loving huggs Pete xxxxx