My sweetheart and soulmate said his final goodbyes on Wednesday evening May 29. He contracted a nasty upper respiratory infection the beginning of May and due to his PSP could not clear his lungs. Was admitted to hospice care at home on May 3 and put on oxygen 24/7. After a few days recovery from oxygen deprivation he refused comfort meds of any kind claiming no pain. My family kept reminding me that anyone who could run 18 marathons had to have a very high pain threshold, not to worry. So thankful both of our grandkids and their parents could visit us in April from Medellin Colombia and Dülmen Germany. Jr was able to return on May 7 and was with us through the end. Ever since Oregon adopted the option of Death with Dignity, Kurt said, if ever he was in a terminal situation he would want to have that choice. With hospice care, he finally entered the 6 month window required by law and began the doctor interview process and 15 day wait period before the final confirmation interview. I could only pray he would remain strong enough in the interim as he noticeably declined each day. He was a man that touched many lives and opened his heart to young men that needed a father figure in troubled times. We had a parade of family, friends and surrogate sons visiting him the last 3 weeks of his life. Remarkably, he rallied every time someone was there. Lucid, alert and interactive, chuckling at their shared memories and jokes. So special to see that sparkle back in his eyes. He lived his life on his own terms and chose his own path in death. We will miss him forever, I am grateful to have shared the past 23 years with him.
Thank you to all who have posted to this site sharing your experiences the past couple of years. It has been an incredible source of encouragement to me enduring the seemingly unending struggle.
Written by
kandk
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My husband, who left on 9th May was also an incredibly fit, articulate and intelligent man, he ran 13 Great North Runs here in the UK and played many Sports.
The next few weeks will be busy.
It has felt like a roller coaster, but today I am off with 2 friends and my dog, on a 4 day walking holiday, to recharge my batteries so that when I return home I can re focus and look towards a new chapter.
Our loved ones will never leave us, they will walk beside us and live in our hearts.
It seems like his life and passing was on his own terms and knowing you have made a positive difference in this world. May we all be so fortunate. Thank you for sharing your words with us.
A picture is worth a thousand words. Now it’s time to cherish all of your wonderful memories that you shared together. I’m glad that he had a peaceful sendoff on his terms. I’m out of words now but I’m sending you huge hugs.
A bittersweet message. The sweet, he is gone and no longer suffering....his choice on ending the suffering. The bitter, he is gone.
It is two years since my barely 55 year old son died. We live in Los Angeles. He too made a choice. He had a PEG and requested to NO LONGER be fed. His Kaiser Permanente health provider (he was in Hospice care) honored his wishes. I am grateful.
My grief was worst during the second year, but I feel in my heart, and in the past weeks, it will be easier ahead. I always comfort myself with the gratitude that Jeff was MY son and I had his presence for 55 years . How fortunate for your 23 years with your soul-mate.
Thank you for your post and for the lovely photo. Oregon is awesome....my daughter and family live in Portland....and I am grateful that California has followed suit with a "Death with dignity" initiative.
Wishing you comfort with the sweet memories you two shared, Los Angeles, CA, USA
Thank you. I can't imagine losing a child to this. I hope one day they can connect all the dots that cause it. Kurt donated his body to our university hospital for research.🌠🌟
My sincere condolences to you and your family at this time, this would have been a long hard journey ,the times ahead could be difficult for you as you adjust to life,take care ,be strong , remember the happy times ,all the best for the future ... Peter.
Thinking of you and your family at this sad time, but how good to hear of someone who was able to his own path at the end. I wish we had something similar in the UK.
He sounded a wonderful and inspirational man but is now at peace away from the the awfulness of this disease. Sending love and virtual support at this sad time.
I send my deepest condolences on your loss. Quite a man. He walks beside you for the rest of time. Hold the memories in your heart. Lots of hugs to you and your wonderful family. 💔💔💔
I’m so sorry. We are still with you as you begin your next journey. He was a treasure and now not suffering. Take it slow and keep posting. Condolences to your family. Take care.
My sincere condolences K; you have had the pain and the privilege of caring for another person so deeply and intimately. Hug that feeling of relief to your heart! Your marathon is over and a new painful time of bereavement begins. I wish you support and love from your dear ones as you adapt to the loss of your wonderful man. ❤️❤️❤️
I am sorry for your loss but I can understand it can be a relief for you both in a way. I am going through the same thing at the moment with my husband. He has PSP and has just entered permanent care. He has deteriorated in the last 3 months very quickly. Last year at this time we were travelling. We cruised from Sydney Australia to Alaska and then went on the Rocky Mountaineer in Canada on to Calgary before flying home. He was walking with just a stick then but now is in a wheelchair. I am so glad we did that as the memories are wonderful. It is hard to believe things can change so dramatically so quickly. it is a very cruel disease. My advice to anyone, anywhere is if you want to do something, do it before you don't have the opportunity anymore. Love each other everyday.
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Rest in peace Dad
Peace at Last
