Fibbed today when someone asked if I was Ok and was I in pain - I said "no" as in no I didn't have any pain, even though I did. There didn't seem any point. I have got pain a lot again, almost all the time, not to mention the sinking realisation that the last lot of injections at the pain clinic haven't quite had the desired effect this time. I am so bored by it, it must bore the pants off everyone else. It's now so much a part of me, just like my nose.
Am going to see someone about it next week, in an attempt to Sort It Out again, or am I just clutching at straws? I'll keep you posted as to how it goes.
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teadrinker
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Hello teardrinker, Bob here
We all the same things I am frightened that I will bore people or get the cluck clucking that some family do. Sometimes if you say your bad they can looked confused and glaze over, so now I just say nothing and you then get the long stare where they are wondering what to say we all are different and the conditions we have become boring , although they are us and are what we are
botox in the trigger points in my shoulder and face. It's been fairly helpful for those areas but I have other problems causing the pain that can't be injected. Have tried almost all the medications with no positive benefits, acupuncture, osteopathy, other evil treatments involving needles, massage and TENS machine. Physio was good so that's where I'm off to next week.
my stock answer to how are you when asked at work is 'same as usual, but at least I'm here', fortunately I have some work mates who know I'm in a bad way they only need to look at me on my worse days. ooh I started a rant so when i re-read i deleted the rest must find somewhere else to vent the rest of the stuff!
it is all so boring ..I tend to say 'I'm fine thanks' ..dont see the point in saying more..those that are close to me get the full episode,those that are passing get the brief. My normal way of coping with it is to focus on others worse off,it reminds me I could be worse..doesnt always work,when it really gets too much I allow myself some self pity and then give myself tlc like i would a child. Im on gabapentin and co codomol and dicoflex and all was working ok ,but at present pain is ..a pain
I agree, I must be a total bore regarding pain. The thing is, it affects every area of your life, yesterday I helped put a computer desk together,I was sitting down and just passing things over, then clearing away the boxes and other rubbish, tidying up in general and it totally knackered me out! Such a simple thing to do and I can,t believe how exhausted I was. seems anything out of the routine of my boring " siting with my feet up" and I am shattered. How a day out in town is going to go down,I don,t know!
A friend in South Africa has just been put on to a new drug for arthritis and is concerned that she has to take twelve a week. I realised I am taking two co drydamol four times a day, seven days a week! Am going to have to try and cut them down somehow. Cannot be doing the old body much good.
Oh well, I must,nt complain, I have been very lucky and have been given a mobility scooter for free and went for my first trip to the shop on it, Brilliant, no pain!!! Have a good day all. Ann
Blimey - all that co-dydramol and you can still ride on your scooter! I never took them that much but had the odd day of taking them now and again. But I'm not sure they're that good and I worry about not being safe to drive, so I don't take them as much as I did.
Yes, I have been trying to cut down. Don,t worrry I only go out in the morning, due to lack of sleep I am up very early and take two tab s as soon as I get up. Then after about two or three hours I go out, usually using my walker. I am wary of getting too attached to the scooter. It is too easy to get on and let machinery do the work for me and as long as I am able I want to walk. It is the only excercise I get, if you can call it that. But reading what you have said,it has given me a wake up call and am going to make a huge effort to cut them down. Thanks for that. It is difficult when you have no one to compare notes with! I am going to look into other ways to deal with the pain, as, at the end of the day, the tablets don,t seem to be working very well anyway. Maybe my body has become used to them? Thanks for your input, Ann
There are few people who can or want to percieve the subtle changes in you when you have differing levels of pain. They tend to be the ones who say nothing because they know you know nothing can be done to help it, because you would be doing it if there was something that helps. They might make a coffee and invite you on an extra teabreak to give you 5 mins rest.
One lady I worked with used to send me to the post office with the registered mail (her job) 1/2 hour - 45 mins before I finished so that there was no point in me going back to work. It was a 10 min walk there and back for me, 5min for her (but sometimes she was too busy to do - always coincided with when I was bad). But she understood I needed to exercise before I could drive home, and gave me time to do it in work time.
People who understand, don't talk about it or make a fuss, they watch over you and make situations that help you, but to others it looks like you are helping them.
Part of me just like my nose - how true, and that's exactly the same amount of attention you should be giving pain. How many times a day, week, month do you focus intently on your nose? I bet compared to pain, hardly ever. We have pain. Its not going away. Our task is to live our lives as best we can by devising new ways of doing things, by keeping our selves as fit as possible. Everyone can sit with cans of beans doing arm lifts while watching telly. Yes it might feel and look odd but you and others soon get used to it.
I have an extended family member whom I have banned from talking about my pain. I spend so much time and energy pushing it to the back of my mind, that I don't want someone asking me about it, or how I'm feeling. They think they are being kind by enquiring, but its just so annoying. I don't particularly want to focus on the reality of my pain, what its done to me as a person, what its done to my body. I just want to live my life the best I can within the boundaries of my pain.
So the short answer is, I don't talk about my pain much to anyone. Those that understand and notice help in their own ways without talking about it, and those who want to talk about it get told to shut up politely. Afterall, if you meet a blind person you don't prattle on and on about blindness, it would be considered rude and insensitive. Why is it so different for pain?
I never start converstations with how are you anymore. Its polite small talk from a century where illness and death were common place. And if you are lying about your pain, then they are probably lying too about how they feel some of the time. Seems totally pointless to me.
I tend not to mention it unless asked, then gloss over it, a bit embarrassed. No one really wants to hear about it, although it doesn't hurt occasionally to swap notes with other people in the same boat. On the other hand, quickly trying to explain that yes, it is still here, no there isn't any operation / pill / etc that will cure it, seems important in educating people about the difference between acute pain and chronic pain. I don't want special treatment but there are some people who need to see that I don't function fully all of the time.
I spend every working day listening to people discussing their ailments, some of whom bear it well and stoically. Others find it much harder to cope. Some people want to talk about it, others just want to get on with it or hide it away.
I am sympathetic towards anyone with chronic pain. I am less patient with people who have acute pain but won't do anything to make it better. It doesn't take long for acute pain to become chronic if it's not dealt with properly. It feels dangerously like a missed opportunity to ignore a sudden sports injury for example, especially when the sufferer is going on and on about it!
I was always brought up to soldier on and not bang on about illness. We had to be at death's door in order to miss school, but maybe that's down to being a nurse's daughter? It's an attitude that has stood me in good stead for coping with my pain. I always think of Monty Python's Holy Grail and the knight hopping about with his limbs hacked off, proclaiming, "It's only a flesh wound!"
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