Looking for support

[mataubkitty]

Hi, my name is Maryanne and I am new to this. My body is racked with intense pain-back, neck, shoulders, hips and knees. I have so many underlying pain issues and health issues. I am a cardiac patient as well. I am 47 years old. I have seen many doctors, ortho, neurosurgeons and other specialists. Medications and simple invasive procedures and injections (steroid) offer only short relief. I can't deal with all pain plus the major depression and severe anxiety-panic disorder I have. I also have memory and some cognitive problems that came from severe pressure and major stress from my last job. I am no longer waiting for disability to approve me in my hearing or no. Just looking for someone to listen and offer some bit of support. Thank You so Much!!!!

[Bananas5]

Hello Maryanne sounds a bumper crop of conditions. You don't give details so I won't ask.

Just to say welcome to this forum and any time you want to ask questions or just have a rant - fire away. No one judges you and help when we can

x

[mataubkitty in reply to Bananas5]

Thank you so much Paton. I injured my back 21 years ago and have been in pain everyday since. My neck pain started just a week or two after. Worker's Comp case and I receive just a couple steroid epidurals which were great but over all this time things have quickly gone down. It was found at that time I had deteriorated disc disease, spondylitis and a lot of wear and tear of the lower back. I had 3 herniated disks too. I was age 26. Later on in life when my neck would give me severe episodes, roughly started 2008. I never knew there could be worse pain than what I had in my low back until my neck. My right arm was incredibly painful and I had numbness in my fingertips. ER doc said you have a pinched nerve, go see a chiropractor. I did and he was amazing. My neck has had many more severe episodes and an MRI was ordered. # herniated disks as well there, spondylitis and major concern was moderate to severe cord compression. They thought surgery right away. I did not want to do that unless absolutely no alternative. I used meds and PT and got it to a point where I could deal with it but of course my pain always comes back. It's not excruciating right now, so I deal with it. Now my back and hips are severe. I take daily meds to take off the edge. Things like Tramadol, Tylenol, Gabapentin and I use to take a muscle relaxer but those stopped working all together. I also used to take an anti-inflammatory but my cardiologist stopped that for whatever reason. I recent had angioplasty for 90 % and a 60% blockage. Years ago, I had taken the harder stuff and grew an incredible tolerance but if it hadn't been for the Lord, probably an addiction because it was 3 1/2 years of taking --Vicodin 750mg 6 a day, Soma 300mg 3 a day and 8mg of Ativan thru the day.. I was actually watching an episode of House the doctor is addicted to Vicodin but still is the most amazing doctor there in case you don't know the show. Anyway he had a freaky breakdown or something because of his addiction. I decided right then and there no more pain pills or Somas and a lesser dose of Ativan for my anxiety. Back to my hips and back. Over the last 4-5 years my back has gone down steadily and as more time went by it went faster. Hello, hip pain popped up and greatly affected my sleep. I think we are in May of 2015 now. I have severe bursitis and tendonitis on both hips. I am a side sleeper due to my back. The pain from my hips makes that pretty difficult. I have gone through steroid injections. only a week of relief. I have tried physical therapy twice but could not do the therapy as it made my back hurt so much more, I couldn't walk. PT was out. I could have the bursa sacs removed but was told they would grow back in about 8 months and the same problem would be there. Well, who wants to do that every 8 months....I will pass. I am now scheduled for a medial branch block in my lower back and then they use radiofrequency waves to do something which is suppose to numb my entire low back area. It's a pretty invasive procedure. I sure hope it works. I also need to start using a cane because of my hips. I have several small grandbabies. I can't enjoy them, I can't really care for them, maybe a few hours for the baby. The older ones maybe a night or so. I had filed for disability in 2008 when my neck popped up like that and I was also pretty much all the way down with my back. I could hardly walk. I had no insurance at that time. Denied of course. I got well enough to go back to work until Spring 2015 everything started hitting me one right after another. I have applied for disability again and am waiting for my hearing date. I have no quality of life, it's kind of always been that way. It's like I have nothing to look forward to. When my eyes awaken each morning; pain, depression, anxiety/panic and stress is there to greet me. I guess that's about it, except for my memory and cognitive issues which I will get into later. They are all caused by my stress levels, anxiety and panic, the pressure in my life.

[gina1]

Are you taking any medication for pain relief? If you do, does that relieve it for a while? I can sympathize with you as I have chronic pain too.

[mataubkitty in reply to gina1]

Hi Gina, I do and it does take the edge off my pain. I couldn't survive without it. I'd literally go insane. Thank you.

[SusieJo1948]

Maryanne I,m not a Dr but I believe you need to see a neurosurgeoun. Every one here would be more than happy to help you. It's a great bunch of people.if you need to talk more I,m around and so are the others.keep your chin up and Don,t give up. Susiejo1948

[mataubkitty in reply to SusieJo1948]

Hi Susiejo, I am currently seeing a neurosurgeon for my back and have also seen one for my neck. The one for my neck says surgery but I can't go thru pain from surgery plus the pain I'm in now. Just can't do it. My pain is controllable right now in my neck so that will be on the back burner until I can get my hips and back under control...if that's ever going to be possible. And thank you for your reply

[DISC]

I am similar to you... in that I am 45 and have all over body pain, 24/7. I have EDS and fibro along with other things. I also have gastroparesis so cant even drown my sorrows with solid food. Its frsutrating when you feel like you simply ahve to self manage your pain ecah day, with the odd meeting with your GP and appointmnets with consulatnst who never seem to help or offer good advice to how to cope, as they don't suffer themmselves and therefore cant empathise. Its amazing how you can be a comsultant and specialist of a condition, yet never suffer from the problem... but I guess they are trying to help. I manage to keep my head above depression although i do often wish I didn't wake up in the morning as yet another day begins with pain. I don't have panic attacks but I do get anxious and find thinking of the futiure daunting, as I worry how much pain I will be able to cope with and how much independence I will have as I get older. You don't say what your health diagnoses are? What I have found useful is seeing an occupational therapist for supports and advice as to hopw to sleep etc. I have also found seeing specialists in pain management helpful, although they don't have all the answers and can never truly understand what it is like to live with pain and deal with empathy fatigue, as friends and relatives get tired of asking how things are when health remains the same. Its not like having something that improves like a broken leg... so people run out of things to say. Sometimes you just want to say... entertain me, make me laught, tell a joke, lift my spirits... but then I guess they have their own lives and problems. Try to organise an OT appointmnet or see your local pain clinic for support. Just being listened to helps sometimes to bridge the gap that chronic pain causes. Good luck.

[mataubkitty in reply to DISC]

Thank you DISC. I am sorry to hear of your terrible health conditions and your pain period. It can just rob a person of everything. I did go into a full explanation to paton about pretty much all my pain issue and what I've done for treatment. I too have fibromyalgia but forgot to mention that in my reply to paton. Because of everything going on pain wise, stress and anxiety and depression, I have lost a lot of my memory and my ability to reason. I don't catch things. If it's in front of my face, I won't see it. I say things that don't make sense and totally not realize. It's a mess. Neurologist called it pseudodementia. Forgot to mention that to. Oh Geez. And I do know what you mean with all these different specialists. It's like I'm here to do my job, this is my job. Do as I say and if it doesn't work, then maybe you need to see someone else, I can't help you. I've had that with a few at least. Many times I have felt like giving up. I wanted God to take me right then and there. I was in such a dark place and didn't know how to crawl out or even wanted to crawl out. I wanted to stay in the dark corner. Everybody leave me alone and I will go into my own world to deal with all this because no other is working. Thank God I am not there anymore. People praying for me has destroyed that dark corner. I seek God more now. I hope I can stay with a little more help. I was put on Risperdol. It's an antipsychotic. Yay, feeling great about that. I find if I can watch something that makes me laugh then that truly is the best medicine. I wish you the very best.

[DISC in reply to mataubkitty]

You seem calmer with having God in your life... and that is good. Everyone has and needs someting and whatever works is a bonus. Take strength in your faith, and that re you are not alone, even in pain. Places like these formums are good to talk. Take care, and I wish you the best too.