I have to tell you that my beloved wife Netti, who posted here under the username Golden Gourd, passed away early yesterday morning. I was with her, as I had been for most of the past week, and it was peaceful at the end. She had spent the past three weeks at our local hospice, and their expert care and compassion meant that she was as comfortable as she could possibly be.
Since Netti’s diagnosis in June 2016 she did not really get any periods of remission and was almost continuously in treatment either with chemotherapy or Parp inhibitor. She started her latest line of chemo in July but was simply not in strong enough health to be able to continue.
I am happy that the expert care she received from the Prof and his team at the Christie meant she was able to enjoy the past two years and do many of the things she wanted to. They never gave up on her and went to great lengths to try and tackle the cancer. She was particularly happy to have lived to see our youngest son get really good A Levels and secure his university place. She knew that she had limited time but was determined to live well and make the best of every day she had, and she certainly achieved that.
I know Netti drew a lot of strength from interacting with others in the same boat as her on this forum and formed some very close and lasting bonds as a result. Thankyou all for the love and support that you gave her. Best wishes to all of you.
Jasper
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I am so sorry to hear that Netti passed away, yet I thank you for thinking of this community even in the mids of your own grief, Jasper. Netti's posts always were a source of joy and strength for me, with a sprinkle of gentle humour to soothe my soul. Especially her likening the disease to a bunch of LotR style 'orks, armed to the teeth and very unhygienic looking' resonated with me; how brilliant your wife was.
Please accept my deepest condolences. I wish you and your kids well, despite the grief you must be experiencing right now. There will be brighter days ahead. Believe.
I’m so, so sorry to hear this, Jasper. Netti was a formidable lady who took this dratted disease in her stride, and always found humour in dark situations. May she be at peace now. Thank you for letting us know xx
I am so sad to read this news but thank you for letting us know. I remember especially some of our earlier posts when we chatted about our allotments and how pleased she was to be on the PARP inhibitor trial. I hope you and your two boys have help to cope with your loss, too early too soon.
I'll miss her wise posts. All the best Jasper.
So very sorry to hear this very sad news Netti was so supportive and helpful, she will be sadly missed my heart goes out to you and your family
I am also very sad to read that your beautiful wife is no longer with us. My love goes to you, Jasper, and your family. Thank you for thinking of us. xxxx
How very sad I am to hear of Netti's passing. What a lovely, warm vibrant friend she was to all on here. Her dignity and serenity in her post on here, when she knew treatment was no longer viable, was both comforting and awe inspiring. My heart goes out to you, her boys and all who loved her. Strength and tranquility to you all.
Sandra x
I’m so sorry. Sending you a virtual hug. Sometimes life doesn’t make sense.
My heartfelt condolences to you and your family Jasper.xx🙏🏼
I’m so sad and sorry to hear this news, I’ll definitely miss Netti’s wise and caring posts here. Thinking of you and your family at this time, rest in peace Netti 💕
Netti was one of the stalwarts of the forum, Jasper. How we will miss her! Despite her own ongoing difficulties, she maintained that wonderful sense of humour and original turn of phrase ('cancer cells dancing a fandango', I seem to remember) and always had helpful words for others. Love to you and your boys. Christine
Thank you so much for letting us know especially at this most difficult time. She was diagnosed about the same time as me and I have followed all her posts, as many say a special lady indeed...
This news has really shocked me somehow... knowing how sad and unfair it is on loved ones who are left to grieve. She is at peace, you and your boys have to find the strength to carry on...
I am very sad to have this news. Netti was an inspiration and such a lovely contributor to this group...she will be sorely missed. Thoughts are with her family ❤️
Netti was a courageous and compassionate contributor to this forum who helped many women with her humour and words of advice. She will be greatly missed by all of us here.
I do hope you have all the support you need to help you through this difficult time.
So sad to hear this news . She was a great support to so many . Fly high dear Netti . Love and prayers to you and your family at this difficult time . Kim x 💜
Oh, Jasper. I am so saddened by the news. Nettie was a wonderful contributor and friend on this forum. She will be missed. I am so glad she is no longer in pain. I hope you and your family will be OK and know she helped so many women on here.
Oh Jasper I am so sorry to hear your news, Netti will be missed here on the forum, a truly lovely lady . Condolences to you and your family x Rest in peace, free from pain Netti xx Kathy xx
Jasper, So very sorry to hear about your beloved Netti. Her courage and humour shone through her messages in this community and she will be greatly missed. I hope that knowing how much she was loved and valued by so many of us will bring some comfort to you and your sons. Jo 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹
Hi Jasper, I am so sorry to hear about your wife. I know you all did the best you can and in her spirit she would give so much blessings. Please know that she is now in the heavenly place.
I know how it feels to loose a loved one as my mum passed away with cancer of the cervix that had spread this year. My condolences to you and your family.
Hello Jasper - I am so very sorry to hear this news, your lovely wife was such an inspiration to me when I first joined this group with her advise and kind words. She will be sadly missed. Love to you and your family. Lyn xx
Dear Jasper . You and you family must have given Netti such love and support through what would have been a most difficult time for you all . I’m sure she was a wonderful wife and mother . Your son will have your example of devotion and loyalty all his life . Please accept my sympathy and respect for all you did for Netti to make her days happy
I'm so sorry to read that Netti has gone, Jasper. Thank you for telling us. I had so much admiration for her and how you all coped with her Ill health. She came across as a very warm, caring person. I do hope your boys are coping and your youngest will still be able to go off to Uni and settle quickly. Your older boy too. I'll be thinking of you all and hope everything will go smoothly for you.
Take care of yourself, with love and much sympathy,
Oh Jasper I am so sorry for your loss. We will miss her on this forum as she was a great support to us all and gained our love and some at the Christie even had the privilege of knowing her personally. My condolences to all the family Gina xx
So so sorry another lovely lady has gone. So glad you were with her in the end. It's a time you never ever want to happen. My mum who was 59 passed in June after only 5 and half mths. Such a difficult time please god may you all find strenght. Talking is good x
So very sorry to hear of your loss Jasper. Netti was a lovely warm and humourous member of the forum and so dignified and graceful in accepting when further treatment wasn’t an option. We’ll miss her hugely. Deepest condolences to you and your sons, you must have been such a comfort to her all through her illness and especially in these last weeks. I’m so glad she was well looked after and at peace. Best of luck to your son for Uni and to all of you in the times ahead, she will always be with you in your hearts.
I'm so very sorry to hear about your dear wife Netti. Despite her own struggles with this dreadful disease she always took the time to reply to other women's posts. Many times I was the beneficiary of her humorous words of wisdom. She always managed to cheer me up and got me to hope in times of despair. I hope you and your family gel some comfort from all the lovely replies on here . She clearly touched so many people. May gentle soul rest in peace
Just seen the news on FB. Am very saddened and glad I had the chance to communicate directly with Netti briefly when she first told us the news was not looking good. Love to all who knew her, she will be sorely missed esp on this forum ❤️
Jasper--I posted already on Netti's FB page but wanted to thank you for this beautiful post as well. I am so sad and hope your family is doing as well as can be expected right now. She was truly loved. oxox
I’m so sorry for your sad loss Jasper, thank you for telling us of Netti passing. She was a wonderful inspirational lady and we will miss her fabulous humour here. Love to you and all your family at this difficult time.
I’m so very sorry to hear your darling wife has found her teal wings. I know Netti was a tremendous inspiration & great source of advice and comfort to us all on here, including myself throughout my surgeries in 2016. It seems so very unfair she never got a break from it all but I’m glad to hear she was, at least, comfortable at the end and you were with her. Thinking of you and the family at this very sad time.
My deepest condolences to you, Jasper. Thank you for giving us closure during a time you are grieving. I'm sorry I didn't get to know your lovely wife, but, having read all these responses, I got to know her. She seemed like a delight and incredibly strong. I see now where she got her love and strength from....you! May God bless you, help you heal and watch over you and your family. XOX
I am so sorry to be late reading your saddest of posts. I am so sorry for you and your boys. Your lovely wife was a huge inspiration to us all, I just wish she could have had more time with you. I felt sad but so touched to see the beautiful photo of you both at the hospice, she looked so serene and peaceful, and you were smiling so bravely. Netti will be very much missed. Sophia
God bless you and your family ..you are all in my heart and prayers...I am glad Netti had the joy of sharing your youngest sons sucess...the road ahead may seem daunting but it sounds like the foundations of love were cemented a long time ago! x
I think everything that you can say has pretty much been said. It has taken me a while to respond because I really feel kind of like there is nothing I can say, not really. The photo Netti posted of the two of your sitting together at the tale was lovely. It just seems so unfair. You wrote beautifully I think a reflection of yourself and your relationship with her.
Oh I'm so sorry to hear this. Golden Gourd was an inspirational member of this group and I always admired her positivity and helpful approach. You must all be devastated. Sendingyou best wishes at this sad time xx
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