A toughy!

Well I had my first big trigger this morning. Had a great day yesterday and a lovely evening out...no cravings! Got hit with a big one this morning after my boyfriend left. As I have never smoked around him my usual routine is to nip to the shops as soon as he leaves and buy some fags. This is the first time I have seen him since my quit day and the minute he walked out the door I wanted to run to the shop :-(. I am so unsure of my ability not to cave that I haven't even ventured out to the shop to get tea bags (I've run out) so I am drinking coffee yuk!!!

It's the first day that I have had an internal battle....I have one voice saying 'just have the one, you will enjoy it and it will make you feel better' and another saying 'don't do it, you will feel guilty, you will smell, it will undo all the hard work you have done so far, you won't forgive yourself and then you will smoke another to try and make yourself feel better'......

15 Replies

  • K8tjane... Yes, there will be continuous triggers even in our smoke free future we will never be without the temptation !!!

    Good for you to stay strong in your quit Well done !

  • It's the "junkie talk" just one won't kill ya, I'll just have this one and I'll stop again, why can't I smoke, I don't drink or do drugs, sure a cigarette is not that bad, my auntie died at 90 and smoked all the way through...I can keep going....it's all normal and part of the process, it does get better, stick with it for another few days and don't let those thought enter your head. You will be fine, it's just a new phase of the quit.

  • Hey K8tjane, hope you got over your trigger earlier this morning ok, day 3 is a tough as I found aswell but got through and on day 14, stay strong, focused and you will get through it.....

  • It passed by lunch time and then I went to gym and haven't craved since. I'm so glad I found this forum and you guys as it's such a great help. I know there are going to be more tough days....

  • Yeah k8tjane, me too, this forum has had a huge impact on my quit, I hope I can be as supportive to new quitters as I continue my journey and you too.....

  • Proud of you k8tjane, well done!

  • How are you doing today buddy? You good? Thinking of you now...

  • Hi all, sorry been super busy with work and staying at the boyfriends. All going pretty well. I'm finding that my worst time is in the morning at the moment, had some really strong cravings on Friday. Had to come home for a couple of hours on Saturday afternoon and nearly caved in then....that voice that keeps saying 'just one fag' is getting a little more persistent.

    How are you doing mmaya & Rowens?

  • I am doing good K8tjane, hang in there, going to put up my daily update now with a reflection so far on my quit

  • I'm doing great! I'm celebrating 20 days today, very little cravings, I'm still very calm and serene. It's great to read abt you, everytime a member disappears we tend to assume they've relapsed, I am delighted to see your update today. It will all be over very soon, promise ;)

  • That's great news! At the moment it doesn't feel like the cravings will ever cease. Don't worry I am going to stick around here for some time...I have the feeling this is going to be a long journey.

  • They will ease, promise you... But then they come in like a storm and you're caught off guard lol I don't really know what's best. It is a very long process and very hard job, that's why so many people fail. At the moment I do not have any cravings at all, I still try to reach for the fag everytime I'm under stress, but I'm being able to stop myself. My very own way of doing this...I used to be very close to my granny and back on the day if anything happened I would go to her straight away. She passed away 18 years ago and I felt left abandoned on my own, I found myself driving around where she used to live and cry and cry. Eventually with the time passing, I stopped going there, I haven't been to the house in over 10 years. I still talk to her every time I need, in my own head! I'm doing the same with the cigarettes, it's not an option, I'm having a virtual cigarettes everytime I need one...by that I mean a set of 20 deap breathes as we would with the fags.it is working....xxx stay with us, everything goes away eventually, time heals everything.

  • Thanks mmaya, your advice is very helpful and the idea of the virtual cigarette is not something I had thought of. I've had a couple of very good days with no cravings, possibly due to being busy. I know they will appear at some point. As of yet I haven't hit a stressful situation but I am well aware that it won't be long before something like that tests my will power.

  • K8tjane...Be assured the cravings cease...Definitely in intensity...for the time of the journey I am sure it will be forever positively spoken.

    It is a lovely journey of rediscovery ourselves and taking control of our own lives and make our own happiness..Isn't that all the reasons why we quit smoking ???

    Nobody ever found quitting to be easy and for me one of the toughest things I have ever done and that is why I want to stay smoke free and never want to go through this "hell" again.

    That is the one side and the other is once you have tasted this sweet smoke free life you never ever want to be entrapped again....

    Sooooo..You just hang in there...Strongs !!!!

  • Thanks Hercu...I never looked that way. The words of inspiration from you and others on the forum are certainly making this easier to take.

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