Hi everyone! Well I am on day 14 have been using nicotine patches when it felt I needed and have an e cig too for those moments my habit moments creep in.
I have wanted to quit for years, but didn't.
Then in January my mum was diagnosed with lung cancer (heavy smoker) and subsequently died 6 days after her first chemo treatment, 1 week after diagnosis. I was with her when she died as was my dad and sister.
Since January I have had a strange relationship with smoking, hating it but unable to stop properly, this is when I realised I was not really trying and kept beating myself up. From January I stopped morning smoking, and smoking in the day but struggled with smoking in the evening and socially despite everything I saw my mum go through.
I had a lightbulb moment two weeks ago. I am fit and healthy in all aspects other than smoking, I work out, eat well, look after my skin and body all bar smoking which is the worse possible thing you can do to yourself. So what was the point of doing all that and still smoke. I asked my self WHAT AM I DOING! To myself.
So it has taken all my strength and retraining my brain but I haven't had a cig for 14 days, the longest time since I was 16, I'm now 36. It's so so hard and it's just the start of a lifetime commitment.
I intended to wean of nicotine patches and e cig and I know some people say that you are still addicted but for me anything that stops me filling my lungs I will do until I retrain my brain again to stop the nicotine.
I'm really proud of myself it's a big thing. Test is this weekend a club night out on Sat night and a wedding on Sunday. I CAN and WILL do it.
I know I will wobble and I am hoping I can turn here for inspiration and also offer support and inspiration in return.
So hi everyone!