Day 10 - feeling fed up

[nsd_user663_40088]

Hey folks. So im happy I have made it to day 10, was kind of thinking boy that was quick! but I feel like im getting no where! I find myself reaching for the spray every 15 minutes these last few days! I dont know why tbh I guess its frustration.

The demon is starting to talk a little louder as well. 'your going to get fat and for what to feel miserable you miss me!?' I have to shut him up straight away though, if I think about what he says its not good.

The spray needs to go. It really does. I think its making things worse rather than better now to be honest. Im using it but its just not satisfying me anymore. Its like im in chronic withdrawal which just has a tiny edge taken off.

I REALLY want to do this. I dont see how smoking helps me any shape or from anymore. The illusions are done, I know its all addict talk. That quick fix mentality is slowly dying because nothing worth doing happens in an instant.

Rant over. :mad: lol

[nsd_user663_40088]

I know we discussed targets before and i did actually set myself one this time. I said If i can make it till christams then thats it no point going back to the fags! Im determined to get there atleast! Ive taken up the gym in a big way as well, I thought you dont want to smoke...you dont want to get fat...only I can stop that from happening so do something about it!

You are right, there comes a time you have to just go for it. Human beings have alot of stamina and will power yet we hand that over so freely to our vices. lets hope i dont sink tho ay lol xx

[nsd_user663_51052]

You need to get your thinking right Nikki.

"If I can make it to Xmas"... "I want to at least make it there".

You've decided not to smoke over and over again because you know it's something that is making you sad and that you don't want to do.

So that's it now, none of this "I'm gonna try", "if I manage that", "I hope I can do that". NO!! You don't smoke anymore. No matter how tough the next few hours, days, weeks might be, you have to get your mind right. YOU DON'T SMOKE ANYMORE.

[nsd_user663_57259]

Hang in there Nikki. Kick nasty Nic where it hurts most and fight on through. No one said it would be easy. If the spray isn't working for you - try something else or go cold turkey. Just DON'T SMOKE!!

Good luck!!!

[nsd_user663_40088]

Yes I agree with everything she said as well

BUT about the christams thing. I think thats been lost in translation. If you look back on some of my old posts it was me banging on about the journey and not the destination as I didnt set targets etc loads of people on here including you Max said its good to have it and some people need them, so i thought why not follow some advice this time. so Its not a case off 'oh lets hold out till christams' its more like a marker if you get me? I have no intention of thinking 'now do i want to smoke now ive done that'? I intend to be concentrating on christmas not smoking by that point

Dammed if you dont, dammed if you do sometimes but anyways

But I agree fully with the first part, I do want to quit badly, but the hard work...Ill admit id prefere any easy option and this is something i need to get to grips with an accept will never happen x

[nsd_user663_40088]

Yes I know but I just like to be accurate

Thank you xx

[nsd_user663_59642]

Well done on your 10 days, Nikki!

You have quit Nikki.....you just have to stay quit and giving yourself a date, such as Christmas, will only make things harder, because that is what is in your mind all the time and it is making you struggle; you'll be thinking along the lines of "if I can just hang on until Christmas.....". But that way, your mind is not at ease, it is fighting and struggling. If you can change the way you think; change your mind, so that it says to you "I don't smoke" rather than "if I can just hang on a bit longer", then it will be completely different for you I am sure; that inner turmoil will be replaced by something which spurs you on, rather than drags you down.

I think quite a few of us are saying (and have said, in the past) the same sort of thing to you, Nikki..........and I bet we all say it through experience.Staying quit is in the set of your mind.

You can do this, Nikki.

Val

xxx

[nsd_user663_59642]

I forgot to say this....make sure that you reward yourself for not smoking as you go along. It doesn't have to be anything huge.......just a nice treat so that you always have something to look forward to. A magazine or a walk in the park breathing in that lovely fresh Autumn air, make yourself a really nice, tasty healthy meal. A treat a day, if need be, whatever it takes!

Val

xxx

[nsd_user663_48218]

I think I get where Nikki is coming from but if I'm wrong please correct me.

When I first stopped smoking I achieved it by breaking the day into sections. Some people do it 'a day at a time'. What I have picked up from Nikki's posts are that she plans to use NRT until Christmas then she will come off NRT. It's not that she is trying to stop until Christmas but that this is the first stage of her journey, where she can stop and appreciate what she will have achieved. Am I right Nikki?

Well done on getting to day 10. What an achievement. Now stay on the path this time because we all want you to succeed.

[nsd_user663_51052]

I don't know if this helps people or if it was just personal to me, but I'll say it anyway.

My mindset was that I can go and smoke whenever I like. I'm perfectly free to do exactly what I want. But I have chosen that I don't want to. So I'm not tourturing myself, I'm just not smoking because I make my own choices and I don't like smoking anymore, so I don't do it.

Maybe that's just something that helped me. But I thought I'd put it out there.

[nsd_user663_56237]

Hey folks. So im happy I have made it to day 10, was kind of thinking boy that was quick! but I feel like im getting no where! I find myself reaching for the spray every 15 minutes these last few days! I dont know why tbh I guess its frustration.

The demon is starting to talk a little louder as well. 'your going to get fat and for what to feel miserable you miss me!?' I have to shut him up straight away though, if I think about what he says its not good.

The spray needs to go. It really does. I think its making things worse rather than better now to be honest. Im using it but its just not satisfying me anymore. Its like im in chronic withdrawal which just has a tiny edge taken off.

I REALLY want to do this. I dont see how smoking helps me any shape or from anymore. The illusions are done, I know its all addict talk. That quick fix mentality is slowly dying because nothing worth doing happens in an instant.

Rant over. :mad: lol

Hey Nikki

Sorry that you're struggling today. I think you've hit the nail on the head there by saying that it's time for the spray to go. Unfortunately it just means that you're dragging out the parts that smokers "enjoy" by hanging onto it, which is probably why you're using it so often. It sounds as though it has become your "dummy".

And that nasty nicotine monster will hang around for as long as you're using it, whispering now and then to plant doubt into your head. Because you're struggling a little at the moment he'll be shouting up a little louder now to really get you under his thumb. :rolleyes:

Don't let that happen hun. He WILL win if you let him hang around.

You need to be angry with him, for making you feel this way. He has no right to be inside your head and you are strong enough WITHOUT him. You don't need to smoke to feel happy or confident or relaxed. YOU can do that all by yourself, without his "help".

And setting yourself targets is a great thing to do, as far as I'm concerned. My targets were so tiny to start with, literally just getting by each day without thinking about smoking was a major achievement.

Don't be scared of the addict talking, just chat back and remind your head why you're doing this. Remember to treat yourself with the money you're saving and be kind to yourself by keeping things as relaxed as possible.

You'll be absolutely fine

[nsd_user663_56237]

I don't know if this helps people or if it was just personal to me, but I'll say it anyway.

My mindset was that I can go and smoke whenever I like. I'm perfectly free to do exactly what I want. But I have chosen that I don't want to. So I'm not tourturing myself, I'm just not smoking because I make my own choices and I don't like smoking anymore, so I don't do it.

Maybe that's just something that helped me. But I thought I'd put it out there.

This was my mindset also It's a bit of a risky one, because it might make people think "well, screw it, it's my choice", but for me it definitely worked

At my worst I just told myself "wait until tomorrow, then if you really want one no one is going to stop you". Eventually the days just disappeared!

[nsd_user663_40088]

Wow!! some really excellent stuff guys! ets147 and sarahlou, i say exactly the same things to myself! I think it gives us back control tbh! quitting isnt being thrust upon us, were chosing it so its always a choice! but we chose not to!

I must admit, today has been rollercoaster. I came so close to smoking it was a joke BUT as much as i felt like turd I just didnt want to smoke it for the reasons that have been said, I didnt even want to have that one puff because i knew as it went down my throat I would regret it. I had a swig of wine and after 5 mins....I was happy i didnt and all those horrible craving feelings washed away. I think that was a big psychological hurdle that has to be tackled tbh

Mark, yeah that was exactly my intention. To have the crutch till xmas then kick it away at that point after some confidence building. But I think I will be ready sooner tbh, within the next couple weeks def. I like to give myself I nice peacful few days when going it alone so ill wait till the right time.

Thanks so much for the comments today guys really appreaciate it xxxxx

[nsd_user663_58817]

Hi Nikki....

10 days is awesome and you must feel proud. It is so hard to do and you have done it !

I fell into my quit.. OH don't smoke and hates it and I done it for the quiet life..but something quite honestly remarkable has happened...I BELIEVE I CAN DO THIS... It's in the mind...the most powerful thing in our body...train it and build it and coax it..anything....Believe and you are half way there.

Christmas will soon be here and before you know it - your 10 days will be weeks/ months !

My opinion only is CT is short sharp shock treatment..but very soon you are clean. Not knocking anyone their methods - anything to stop killing themselves, but My God, my body is thanking me a thousand times over now.

Now...though...soon another battle must commence and that will be the 10lb I have gained in weight. But to be honest, not bad for 6 months.

Show your fists and FIGHT with a smile on your face xx

[nsd_user663_4558]

What about some of that magic-dust woo. Nikki you are doing great - plod, plod on and enjoy your quit.