Day 5

[nsd_user663_58459]

Just wanted to say hi, I'm new. This is going on day 5 for me. This is my third attempt to quit. My first attempt lasted 2 months, my second lasted a day and a half. I'm using the 14mg patch which helps a little but I still find myself wanting to go out and smoke. Day 3 was hell for me. I didnt use a patch so I had full blown symptoms. I was tired, irritable, angry, nauseated and had a headache all day. I wake up and want to head for the back door. It passes soon. But by mid afternoon I get a strong urge. They say it only lasts minutes but mine seemed to last like at least an hour today with a few short urges. I'm trying really hard not to fill my time with food, snacks or candy because last time I gained 20 lbs in that 2 months and I'm still trying to lose it. I'm struggling really bad because I love to smoke. It relaxes me. It's been my way of starting and ending my day for 17 years now. So it's really hard. But my husband quit last year and my kids keep telling me to quit and it would be nice to go to the gym and be able to fully breathe the whole time. I just wish I could do both. I know it all passes. To be honest last time at 2 months I didn't even think about a cigarette. I thought I could just have one. But I couldn't. I thought I'd lose the weight I'd gained but I didnt. I hope it sticks this time.

And I wish all of you the same, while we fight this battle together.

Sorry for babbling.

[nsd_user663_58318]

I'm on day 5 too!! Be my quitting buddy!! I'm also using patches, they do take the edge off, I lasted 5 months my last quit and at my dads wedding I had "just one" too, the worlds bigget lie! This is going to sound stupid but I've been following my bodies demands to go to the places I use to go and have a fag but instead of sucking on one I've been sucking on a bottle of water with a sports lid, so you literally suck the water out. It's not perfect but it does help. I also downloaded an app that tells me what stage my body is at with detoxing, how much money I have saved and how many people have died of smoking related illness since I quit. It's good for motivation!

[nsd_user663_54305]

Jenn,

Hi and welcome to the forum!

I'm struggling really bad because I love to smoke. It relaxes me. It's been my way of starting and ending my day for 17 years now.

This is the addiction talking and is a total illusion. Think about what a cigarette does for you - it just relieves those anxieties / cravings caused by the drop in nicotine level - the nicotine level which you topped up with your last cigarette. It's a chain reaction which countless victims have failed to break before their own untimely demise. By relieving those cravings you are doing nothing more than trying to make yourself feel 'normal' - like non-smokers feel all the time! As a smoker, it's not so much that you enjoy smoking, it's more the case than you don't enjoy not smoking.

I know it all passes. To be honest last time at 2 months I didn't even think about a cigarette.

You've been quit for two months in the past, long enough to see what life is like once you're though the rough bit, so I guess if you think about it you know the above already.

I thought I could just have one. But I couldn't.

It's a tough lesson to learn and I'm sure nearly every long term quitter on this forum learnt it the hard way - most of us have a previous long term quit under our belts which ultimately failed because we thought we could have 'just one'. You can't - you know it because you learnt the hard way, just as I did. I certainly won't fall into that trap again - I know I will always be an addict and 'just one equals square one'.

I hope it sticks this time..

Don't hope it, know it! It's not down to luck, it's down to you; it's completely within your control. So long as you remember NOPE (Not One Puff Ever), you cannot fail! It's that simple, and it's that hard!

A final piece of advice - read these forums, dig back through the archives and you will find a wealth of hidden gems. Remember that we all have a common goal but various opinions on how to get there, so some things will resonate with you more than others - for example I don't 'get' NRT at all, but I know it has worked for others so good for them if it gets them to the end goal. The more you read, the more you will understand your addiction and when it comes to beating the enemy, knowledge is power

[nsd_user663_57259]

Hang on in there Jenn - we are all here to support you!!!

[nsd_user663_58459]

Ok so I wrote that in the middle of the night so today is officially day 5. I'm still struggling and I freaked out in the shower because I thought my patch fell off. My little brain demon keeps poping in and telling me to just get over it and smoke. I feel like a nutcase talking to it telling it to shut up. I got mad yesterday because my dad had the insensitivity to ask me to go buy him cigarettes. My husband is supportive he quit last year. We were quitting at the same time but he had more of a desire to quit then I did. He says he doesn't even feel like having one anymore. He said sometimes he does when everyone around him is but he can deal with it. I just told him I'd quit while he's gone so he won't be with me going crazy. I didnt feel ready to quit but I'm sure I never would have unless I was faced with some bad condition. It will be nice though to be able to exercise and breathe at the same time.

Thanks for the posts. It's nice to be able to talk to others who are going through the same struggle as me. I called the hotline here but honestly the people I talked to I feel never smoked in their life.

I don't know who wrote the posts that quoted what I said because I can't see it as I write this but thanks. You are dead on. I really don't know what it's like to live as a non smoker and I know it's the addiction talking, because its still talking to me. I just want to sleep till this is over. It's miserable hoist through this. Not only fighting addiction but fighting a way of life. Every memory I have involved a cigarette and everything I've done involved a cigarette. I hope things don't get worse when I run out of patches because I don't want to use them as a crutch too long. I just wanted them to get me through this rough time.