So I was out with friends last night having a drink. You might remember me telling you about my quit buddy (one of my friends) who stopped at the same time as me but decided to continue smoking on a Friday night ONLY. This has been working for her and last night was another of those. I've always been a little envious that she could continue to smoke when drinking, but wake up the next morning and be right back into the no smoking zone.
Anyway, I just noticed a change last night, in myself as well as her. She continued to tell us that she was happy being a "social smoker" when the subject came up, but when she decided she wanted one (she didn't buy any because she usually pinches one or two from a friend rather than having to get rid of the rest of a packet) she really wanted one!! Her mind was fixed only on finding this person so she could go out and smoke with them. Honestly, it was weird to watch, as I remember being like that all the time. But I didn't realise how much it can still have a hold on you, even though you very rarely touch one anymore.
I'm hoping to suggest that she cut the Friday ones out altogether, as last night was also the first time she asked "so, do you not even think about smoking when you drink?" (I was particularly proud to be able to say that it didn't bother me anymore). That tells me that maybe she wishes she didn't crave when she drinks?
She has been quite adamant that it doesn't bother her that she has one or two on a Friday (and not every single Friday), so I don't know if I can change her mind, but I'd like to try!
I suppose the point is that, while the first few weeks were really difficult for me, I'm so happy that I can enjoy EVERY aspect of my life without that hold over me, telling me that it's time to entertain the dirty nico demon xxx