This is funny

[nsd_user663_19503]

Two old ladies were outside their nursing home, having a smoke when it started to rain. One of the ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette and continued smoking.

Lady 1: "What's that?"

Lady 2: "A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet."

Lady 1: "Where did you get it?"

Lady 2: "You can get them at any drugstore."

The next day ... Lady 1 hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms. The guy looks at her kind of strangely (she is, after all, over 80 years of age), but politely asks what brand she prefers.

Lady 1: "It doesn't matter as long as it fits a Camel."

[nonico 7 Years Smoke Free]

Regular size?

In this country that is referred to as "regular size".

[nsd_user663_18145]

hehe

good one not seen that before

here is one that a friend sent me that made me chuckle

A young monk arrives at the monastery. He is assigned to helping the

other monks in copying the old canons and laws of the church by hand.

He notices, however, that all of the monks are copying from copies,

not from the original manuscript. So, the new monk goes to the head

abbot to question this, pointing out that if someone made even a small

error in the first copy, it would never be picked up! In fact, that

error would be continued in all of the subsequent copies.

The head monk, says, 'We have been copying from the copies for

centuries, but you make a good point, my son.'

He goes down into the dark caves underneath the monastery where the

original manuscripts are held as archives in a locked vault that

hasn't been opened for hundreds of years.

Hours go by and nobody sees the old abbot.

So, the young monk gets worried and goes down to look for him. He sees

him banging his head against the wall and wailing.

'We missed the R ! ! !

We missed the R ! ! ! ! !

We missed the R ! ! ! ! ! ! !

His forehead is all bloody and bruised and he is crying

uncontrollably.

The young monk asks the old abbot, 'What's wrong,

father?'

With A choking voice, the old abbot replies,

'The word was..........................................

CELEBRATE!!!'

[nonico 7 Years Smoke Free]

Lucky?

HaHa - that's funny Carol.

Some might say it's lucky the R was left out - I think even the bible has references to "nagging wives".

[nsd_user663_18145]

hehe

ive just noticed that on one thread we are both having a moan and a groan about things that annoys us but then having a giggle reading jokes

mind you it does do you good to do both

oh and coffee my mornings wouldnt be complete without coffee

oh and i cant forget my cuddlles of Mr Grey even though he dont like it when im typing and often lies on the keyboard or my arm to stop me he does make me laugh so much im sure he is watching the simons cat videos when im in bed

he was feeling sorry for himself as he had to go for his ickle op yesterday but is back to his normal mad playful self today