I've been feeling so good the last few days that today's weakness hit me hard.
To cut a long story short:
1. Argued (badly) with dad
2. Brother depressed and needed to cry on my shoulder - he smoked like a chimney (not with me, but the smell is overwhelming)
3. Work at moment is shit
4. The fox got my three chickens.
I've had to endure that whiny voice again. It's returned with a vengeance:
Whiny voice: A fag will make you feel better
Me: No, it won't
Whiny voice: Just have one. Imagine how nice it will be lighting up
Me: No, I'll have some water instead.
Whiny voice: Nothing can relax you like a fag. Just light up. Go on. You know you want to. Just one...
etc. etc. etc.
So I can't wait for tomorrow to come. I am fully aware that this is another association - another obstacle. It's bloody hard work. I just hope the next week is going to be easier, but with family issues hotting up, i doubt it...