Struggling today - day 24

Ok. its my day off and .. I have reached and just past my normal cave point, I made it through all the insomnia, itching to the point I swear my cats didnt sit with me cos they thought I had Fleas and were going to offer me their Frontline...:eek: restless legs, coughing etc... made it past all the yuk stuff and seeing the benefits, lovely skin, smells nice, sleeping etc...and I was thinking wooohoooooooooooo shes done it

but now I just feel I am back to square one...Im tired all the time, I wake yo at 5am then my eye lids clamp shut when I have to get up at 6.45 I have to force myself to get up... with my eyes closed slap my face a little, no energy adn falling asleep at 5pm on the sofa and really panicking about saturday night, my friends birthday party , finding I clearing my throat again

What happening?? Everything was going so well adn now BOSH..its all a mess again, sat and cried this morning and I dont know why, all I was doing was thinking how fab summer was this yr ...Then I read on here that someone was still craving badly after 12 months and to prepare for it etc...OMGGGG

Whats going on please I feel like Im on an emotional roller coaster and I want to get off cos Im not enjoying this ride :(

15 Replies

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  • Hey hey hey!!!!

    Come now, its not all bad, theres a few dips and troughs, i feel your frustration though and i was feeling just the same when i was where you are.

    You'll have good days and bad days, today it seems is a bad one, tomorrow should be fab again. I had a niggly day yesterday, but am 8 weeks tomorrow and there are seriously less and lessening all the time. Honestly!!!

    YOU WONT FEEL LIKE THIS FOREVER!

    Your brain is resetting, getting used to not having the crutches and the incredible amount of harmful chemicals.... the nicoteen monster is prodding you cos he wants his fix..... dont let him win!!!

    I took each day at a time and when i woke up i saw what it was like and acted accordingly, somedays were bouncy, some were a bit naff, dont push yourself.

    You've been ill with an addiction for many years, your now getting better... those feelings, thats repairation and healing that is.

    Keep with it... sending massssive hugs xxxx

  • Stay strong, you are doing so well.

    What will you achieve if you go back to the fags, nothing we will only be doing this in another month, 6 months, a couple of years down the line. The feelings are going to be the same, the process will be the same, the symptons are going to be the same.

    If you go back to smoking all the recovery you have done to your body will be reversed, do you want to be old, haggard and smelly again. Your energy will be gone and your nice lounge will be gone.

    I've used some of the money I've saved to buy a canvas for my lounge with inspiring slogans on it (£20 from next). When I crave I sit there and look at them. Would something like that go in your nice lounge?

    Ride through it, chick, you're stronger than them.

  • Thank you Girls, I know deep down you are right, I'm hearing you but its not yet hitting my brain, been for a wander down garden, kicked a few leaves about, jumped up adn down.. all my normal things I do to kick it just arnt working today...I dont even want to leave the house ...how silly is that lol

    I WONT give in... I cant...you right its not going to like this forever, it WILL get better and no I dont want to look old and be smelly again lol

  • Shortstuff, please see my post on Nifty's 'Help' thread. Please don't think you'll still be struggling months down the line, it's just not true.

    I had days like this at the beginning. I'd sit and cry and think that it should all be fine by now, that I was clearly a weaker person and more addicted than all the other people on the forum.

    But I'm not. You're not. ALL of us can achieve this thing. When you face a bad day like this one just make that choice not to smoke today, and you'll wake up tomorrow having faced down that demon and you will be stronger and further in your quit. The longer you go on, the freer and happier you will feel.

    Treat yourself to something nice. You are doing a fantastic thing and you deserve it!

    Helen x

  • suck it up buttercup

    :)I can totally relate short, Same day as you and had a bad couple of days. Everyone is so right though. Keep going matey, we are nearly at the 1 month milestone!! x

  • I know what you mean about the tiredness. For some people it comes and goes. I haven't had it for a few weeks now. You're doing so well. Keep it up and you'll reap the rewards.

  • Thank you everyone, I know you are all right! I decided I needed something really yummy so popped down garage and got a giant cookie lol...Then got home and it me...I stood at the till and right on the shelf on the counter is all the fags and backie where you can actually take them off yourself...and I didnt even give it a second thought

    Feeling a lot better now and past a biggie :D Phew so thank you all so much for holding me up :) think Ill be ok again fro a while lol

  • I had loads of those days:(but everytime you get through it ,its milestone.

    Keep going we are all behind you and supporting you.:D

  • Thank you everyone, I know you are all right! I decided I needed something really yummy so popped down garage and got a giant cookie lol...Then got home and it me...I stood at the till and right on the shelf on the counter is all the fags and backie where you can actually take them off yourself...and I didnt even give it a second thought

    Feeling a lot better now and past a biggie :D Phew so thank you all so much for holding me up :) think Ill be ok again fro a while lol

    Well done short stuff. Take strength from knowing that however down in the dumps you were feeling, when faced with the very tempting opportunity to buy a pack and light one up your desire to remain a none smoker is greater than any cravings that nicotine can throw your way. Keep going!!!

  • Carol those days are not nice eh - dont fancy many of those lol

    Thank you Lungs 1 nasty one smacked with a hammer lol got a bit messy for a while tho lol

  • Hang in there, it passes!

    I know where you are and what it feels like. Remember that over 4000 chemicals are trying everything in their power to get you to smoke again, but you have already shown them that you are stronger than them. All you need to do when a really bad like this one hits you is nothing. You don't need to do anything. You don't need to smoke either, because smoking will not make you feel any better, not even immediately. In fact you will feel better quicker if you do NOT smoke than if you do..... the craving only passes if you don't smoke.

    Believe in yourself a little. You've come this far, you CAN make it through.

    Love

    Shanita

  • Shanita thank you . after that really pants time I actually feel better than I have felt all the way through... Im beating it :D its working, you DO feel better each day and the craving do get less and less, even if a pig of a crave hits you to try to knock you... you feel tons better after :D

  • Stand up big and straight and tall Shortie :)

    Well done beating it.....and you're right. Easier and easier and easier.....and stronger and stronger with every crave you whack. Chuffed to bits for you.

  • Short Stuff.... You have almost done a month! A whole month! Be proud it gets easier!:D

  • LOL I'm standing tall....well as tall as 5ft 2" can get haha.

    Feeling very chuffed with myself now, and in some warped way I'm glad I did have that big wobble, because it does change you, I now feel a few more steps up the ladder :D

    And another plus side, I have a big 40th Birthday to go to tonight, adn its blowing a gale, raining then hail storm and Im staying in the pub in teh warm! I dont have to brave the elements to get a fix WooHooooooooooo use that time for a couple more JD's haha

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