First of all, I'd like to say thanks. I'm on Day 4 of quitting smoking, and coming across this forum has really helped.
It isn't easy (stupid thing to say). I'm short-tempted, snappy, angry, frustrated. I keep apologising to those around me for being an ass, but it really seems beyond my control, which I also hate.
I'm really happy to have gone 4 days without smoking. I had come to truly hate cigarettes, nicotine, the addiction, and everything that goes along with it.
I've been prone to quite serious depression since I was young, and, as many people have said, quitting is bringing that up for them too. I saw one lady relaying a fear similar to mine - is it the quitting that's making me depressed, is it my natural, always present depression? Is it a mixture of the two? Is the quitting triggering my own depression? Will I feel like this forever?
Phew! Lots of questions. But they are all mainly rhetorical, I don't really expect answers, those are just some of the things running around in my head. I just feel so bereft of anything positive - I feel flat, listless. The only emotions I seem to be experiencing are anger and despair. I know that all sounds so extreme, which is why I worry about the depression factor as well.
I know I don't want to smoke tobacco again - never, ever. But the level of depression is really affecting me, as I haven't had it be this bad in a number of years. 2012 was a really horrible year for me, for many reasons, and I'm trying to top it off by doing something positive for myself.
Thanks in advance for any words you might have.