Day 5 struggling with the psychological aspect of it all

Hey, so ive reached my dreaded day 5 and it is fine, i am not going to smoke today. but the psychological part of it is getting really bad now! the amount of arguements im having with myself is getting a joke! but i know on some level that one day this will be a distant memory of 'oh yeah i used to do that!' like with any habbit. how long does this last for on average?

today it kind of hit me like 'really? im never going to have a ciggerette again? do i really want to commit to that? forever is a long time!' i heard you can make and break a habbit in 3 weeks, so i have said to myself i atleast want to find out if that is true...i have a funny feeling it gets easier from 3 weeks.

any advise or experiences on this one would be greatly appreacited xxxx

19 Replies

  • First of all can i say that you are doing so so well. You've taken the steps and your on day 5! yay, i swear it gets easier after day 3...after 2 or 3 weeks of mental torture it starts to get easier. lol. Im not sure everyones quit is the same but i know exactly what you mean, that repetative thought process, i want something, what is it, a smoke, cant have one, ive stopped playing a monotone cycle in your head. It honestly gets easier and it goes away completely eventually. I would say 3 weeks to 1 month and if you can get that far you've done it.

    Ive quit 6 months now (just yesterday in fact) and there is now way i ever want to do day 1 2 or 3 over again so i intend to stay quit. You'll find once you get down the line a bit you'll probably & hopefully be the same.

    Good luck and keep up the fab work! xx

  • well done for reaching the 6 month mark!! i would defo be celebrating!!:) and what you said i found very useful thank you!

    my friend quit 5 months ago and she says the same as you, she still sometimes think 'oh i could have a fag right now' but she doesnt see the point in taking herself back 5 months, i guess it isnt worth doing all over again.

    I think once i get to a point where i dont crave it psychologically and get that sinking feeling i wont go back either, must be a miracle when you dont have to deal with that!!! :D

    no prepered to cave in yet so hopefuly i will see that 1 month you speak off! thanks again :p xxx

  • i totally agree with andiebaby i would say 3 weeks to a month was the turnaround point for me to the obsessive thoughts started to ease quickly and once i had done a month i knew that was it i could never go back

    also for me a big part of staying quit is i know i can never go through the first week ever again

    stay strong and do whatever it takes to clear your first month and once you have got through that the only way is up and forward


  • I think it would be a good idea to stop thinking that you can never have another cig again. It too much to accept in the early stages of your quit.

    I found that thought too hard to come to terms with at the begining so I just did not think about the future. Just think about one day at a time and get through that day.

    Eventually without you consciously thinking about it you will be saying I am never going to smoke again.

  • Well done!

    Well done on getting to day 5. I can only agree with all the other comments on her and say it does get easier. You are very young and so this is a brilliant decision you have made. The obsessive thoughts do stop and you will just think about smoking less. Keep it up! Stay strong you have done the hard first 3 days.:):)

  • wow thats all making me feel alot more positive! if i know that it will ease it off and become a distant memory that is enough for me :D xxx

  • Hi Nikki...

    A lot of good comments above. And I echo the message that it does get easier and easier.

    Think of it this way: you have spent a number of years training your brain, so that it now prompts you to smoke in any number of situations/mental states. At the moment, you are coming up against these prompts ALL THE TIME. So your brain is going 'smoke, now, please!' and you are going 'NONONONONO' about twenty times a day. It's a strain, a really big strain.

    But the thing is, after you have encountered these prompts a few times, your brain will learn that this is no longer a time to prompt you. If you've always smoked while waiting for the bus, say, then the first couple of times you do that you'll be obsessively wanting a smoke, but after a couple of days, it won't be hard at all.

    That's why it gets easier. You break down these associations one by one, and new prompts get fewer and further between. However, be aware THEY WILL STILL CROP UP weeks, possibly months, into your quit. A really bad stressful situation, bad news, hospital visit, holiday - something you haven't encountered since quitting. As long as you recognise those moments as a new prompt which can be beaten like all the others, you'll be OK.

    The voice of your inner addict can sound persuasive, but they're not worth listening to, and after a while, they'll give up and go to sleep. Don't ever wake them by lighting up another smoke!

    Five days is brilliant. You are well on your way to freedom, and it's worth every moment of aggravation. Keep going, and be proud of yourself!


  • i really love this site, just when its getting to much theres someone who says the right things to make it all better :o

    Today has been alot better than yestersday. at one point i really thinking you kow what just have one it really wont hurt your on NRT anyways! but i really want to atleast make it to 3 weeks, because i believe there will be a big improvement at that point, and if that is the case then well i know for myself what you say is true...which im sure it is or you would all be smokers again haha!

    thank you that really does make sense and im defo gonna remind myself of these points when the urge comes :D xxxx

  • Just to add my pennyworth to the commentary...

    Another member mentions about changing your mindset and it really that. But then it's simple to say that although harder to get to actually do so. I've mentioned a few times about H.A.L.T. which is a relapse prevention acronym technique that helps with addiction recovery. It stands for Hunger, Anger, Lonely, Tired.

    In your early days of stopping smoking, now 6 days, you think to yourself about how much you'd like a cigarette. And yes, if you do keep repeating to yourself 'no no no no', deny the urge then you really are changing the years of brain washing into a more healthier perspective.

    But as well as that do ask yourself when you get your urges it possible that you are hungry and rather than getting some food you think about a smoke because that's a hunger repressant; or angry at something or someone and rather than take it out on the person or thing you have a smoke break to put some 'breathing space' inbetween the anger issue and yourself; lonely? Many of us went through the loss of best friend syndrome which we thought smoking was; then there's tiredness and gosh I can subscribe to that at the moment even though I'm 4 years plus down the road I'm exhausted and tempted by the notion of a smoke. Luckily I've recognised that and manage to distance myself from that fleeting urge.

    6 days is awesome, by the way :cool:

  • I would just like to say that I think it is fantastic that you guys with the positive vibes and experience to back it up rally around the newbies .. Nikki take heed .. we are all behind you .. onward and upward my friend x :)

  • guys with the positive vibes and experience to back it up rally around the newbies...

    Thanks for your comment's appreciated :)

    Have a Coffee, Women

  • I would just like to say that I think it is fantastic that you guys with the positive vibes and experience to back it up rally around the newbies .. Nikki take heed .. we are all behind you .. onward and upward my friend x :)

    Just to echo what Suze said (and I've only been on the forum a week or so), it's fantastic to see long term quitters still around to offer hope and encouragement to us newbies. The positive messages that you guys keep giving really do make a difference.

    I really do hope that, (and I know that it's) a long way down the line, I'll be in a position to offer the same love and hope to those that are all finding this all a little bit scarey...

    And Nikki, stay strong, we are all here with you! :) x

  • Hi Nikki,

    The psychological aspect of quitting is the biggest part, but unlike many people will try to tell you, it's not about how long you can hold out without smoking, how long before you crack, how well you can deal with the pressures of having quit etc. but more about how well you can see that the whole smoking paradigm was a farce in the first place.

    None of us need to smoke, and in fact none of us really enjoy smoking. I used to believe differently... And I even tried to convince others... But, if I'm true to myself... I was deluded. I don't say that lightly.

    Psychology is all about sorting out your own mind, right? Think about it, and why you know what you know is best for you!


  • Yeah i too hope i can be an experienced quitter helping the january 2013 cycle of quitters lol :D it is so helpful though having people who have ben there and done it, puts it into perspective! thats why i dont see the smoking nurse because she has never smoked in her life so her telling me to have a bannana to help :mad: made my blood boil that one.

    It is true that this smoking thing is delusional. there is no benefit what so ever. nothing has been made worse by quitting, but in those though moments you have to be very on the ball to handle it. but i think half of it is knowing it will pass.

    A week done now :p so happy i got here xxxx

  • Nikki

    You have made your first week. That is absolutely fantastic.

    Just keep going one day at a time and it will soon turn into a month.

    Well done, very pleased for you


  • "thats why i dont see the smoking nurse because she has never smoked in her life so her telling me to have a bannana to help :mad: made my blood boil that one..."

    Oh, that's such a shame. My Cessation Nurse only quit a few months ago so she can relate to any issues I have. I had my meeting with her today and it was a very productive chat. :)

  • haha be abit of a contradiction if she didnt give up i think! lol lets have a fag and talk about it :cool:

  • Advice from mash is ''100 smokers were asked if they could stop smoking forever, they all said no , when asked if they could do it for a day they all said yes''. u only have to say no to the next puff and u wont have to smoke the next million. Smoking is shit lets face it, its a counterfeit conundrum of deceipt and lies. u need a smoke like u need a hole in the head. u need neither ,you've escaped, so keep walking my friend.


  • Cheers!

    Lots of good, positive advice in all the posts! Congrats, keep moving forward a day at a time.

    People will probably think I'm nuts now when they wonder why I'm walking around muttering to myself - "you don't need one, find something else to do" and off I go on the move. A short walk, a trip up and down the stairs at work break the cycle. When out on the road, a quick stop, flex the body with a couple of laps around the car kicking tires as I go. The crazy lady - but hey it's working.

    Since quitting 4/9/12, there were lots of mind games going on, but I've noticed they are getting fewer and farther in between. Like one other poster said and is also one of my mottos "I don't want to relive week one"!

    I've gone this long, I do NOT need them even if my brain thinks otherwise....

    Hang in there, it does get easier!

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