Feeling confused, angry and want to smoke!

I am so fed up and angry, again. My father died a few months ago, and

his wife has just sold all his childhood toys from the 1930's- not a

word to me or my siblings, no choice of us having anything just 'got

rid of'. And that is despite my asking her verbally and in a card for

her please to let us see anything she is disposing of. It just feels

so sad, and so unjust. I so want to have a cigarette to, I dont'

know, get rid of my feelings I guess.

Pigs

6 Replies

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  • That is miserable, and so upsetting. I can imagine how you must feel. And I can imagine how feeling it would make you want to smoke. But would a fag in ANY WAY improve the situation? Nope. You'd have exactly the same confusion and anger, and be a smoker again too, after all your hard work.

    I'm so sorry for your loss. Hope you find peace soon. x

  • Hi Pigs,

    Sorry to hear of your loss. I can understand how you must feel right now. I would be livid if that happened to me. These are things you can never replace & are a reminder of our loved ones.

    You know a cigarette won't change any of this & I can quite understand that you want one, so would I. Just think how proud your father must be of you & I am sure he would not want you to break your quit now.

    Gaynor xx

  • I am so fed up and angry, again. My father died a few months ago, and

    his wife has just sold all his childhood toys from the 1930's- not a

    word to me or my siblings, no choice of us having anything just 'got

    rid of'. And that is despite my asking her verbally and in a card for

    her please to let us see anything she is disposing of. It just feels

    so sad, and so unjust. I so want to have a cigarette to, I dont'

    know, get rid of my feelings I guess.

    Pigs

    Forget the cigs, what you need is to go round there and twat her!!!!:mad:

  • oh that is so hard, I have known people who are bereeaved to wear their loved ones clothes- for your loss not to be acknowledged is awful. But I am guessing father's wife was never particularly sympatico to you, and men can be absolutelty blind to that in their partners. I think he will be watching and knowing now, and you can connect with that and feel close to his spirit- possessions are meaningless.

    Please dont smoke- if you do, for a little while you will satisfactoruily be able to blsame her for it but the truth that you did it will get you in the end.

    Thoughts:(

  • Thank you all so much, I am very proud to be able to say I haven't smoked. I know it would just taste foul now, and I would so regret it. I have to admit I have fantasies about punching her on her extraordinarily ugly nose!!! I've never reallly liked the woman, but have really tried hard because she did give him a new companion after my mother died. Not actually sure he even liked her much!! But now its really hard to continue to be 'nice' when she is such a thoughtless, unempathic and selfish cow!! Sorry, turning into a rant here! Off to have a nice glass of chilled white wine!

    Take care, and keep smoke free!

    Pigsx

  • Well done on staying smokefree Pigs.

    Perhaps you should ask her why she didn't give you and your siblings the opportunity to see/have your father's things and see how she wriggles out of that one.

    Take care and keep up the good work.

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