hey everybody just checking in - am finally in month 2 - it feels like it took an eternity to get here since i completed 4 weeks on monday. As some of you will know have had a difficult week - got made redundant monday, OH fell out with me and we havent spoken since.
But normally i would be in such a state that the only thing to calm my nerves would be to chain smoke. STill havent had one - havent really thought bout having one - its just that urge when you think to yourself - i should be doing something now, like youre hand is missing something. OH is testing my patience - he still smokes so has started leaving cig packets round the house this week. Either on purpose to wind me up or purely just laziness. Am sat in study now and on my desk there were a packet of 20 cigs ashtray and lighter next to the laptop. was not happy cos i banned smoking from our house and to prove a point i took them all out of the packet destroyed each one of them and shoved the back in ashtray. He'll think twice before leaving his precious cigs around the house now. Not very supportive either!!! Dont understand men and never will but cest la vie!!
Anyway rant and rave is over - sorry for moaning on here bout private stuff its cos my family and friends will be very anger at OH if i tell them whats happened.
Anyway trying to stay strong and felt damn good to crush those cigs in my hands. Am having a few days with my sisters and nieces so it will be nice and cheer me up. Wont have to worry about trying to hide away from my two darling niece when i smoke so they dont see. if they used to come up to me to get me to join in a game i'd have to say ' stay back angel aunties been dirty'' So dont have to see that disappointed look on their faces anymore.
Thanks for being there to put up with my neurotic tendencies