Bad weekend- serious triggers!

Hey people, well, it's been a doozy of a weekend. If ever there was a smoking trigger situation yesterday had 'em all. My sone (bleeding teenagers, grrr) spent Friday night at his friends, all fine, due home Saturday afternoon. About 5ish we get a call from him, sounding completely smashed, asking to be picked up from a supermarket carpark. Well, oh got there just after the ambulance. He came home to get clothes as the ambulance crew had to cut off the boy's clothes as he was practically hypothermic and unconscious.

So, oh drove me to A&E with the stuff to find the boy, he went home to look after teenager number 2. The boy was all cut up, unconscious, low blood pressure, low body temp, etc etc. That's what happens when a small for his age 15 year old drinks half a litre of vodka in the rain in a park with his mates. He'd fallen, hence the cuts all over his face- thank God the staff in the supermarket called an ambulance as between his initial call and my oh getting there god knows what could have happened.

So, terror, anger, tears, fear, love and general anguish- if that aint a smoking trigger combo I don't know what is! Anyway, the boy is home today, after being heated, rehydrated etc etc. And one very tired, stressed, worried mum is still not a smoker. Small mercies eh. I found it hard when I was outside calling my oh to update, so many people were smoking- but they just annoyed me! I wanted to scream at them to go away- angry lady!

So, now I'm hibernating and feeling v sorry for myself. I think I need a holiday! :(

20 Replies

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  • Damn girl, ship that boy to the southern US and I'll put and old fashioned butt whipping on him. I am raising an idiot teenage boy myself and have a couple of stories I could share with you.

    Seriously, my hats off to you for keeping it together through that. It is perverse to think, did he get sick enough to not drink for awhile. As we say 'round these parts, Ya done good.

  • Hi Deedeebel :)

    Oh boy a doozy of a weekend for sure, but glad your son is OK after giving you all such a shock, cut's and bruises will heal and it could have been so much worse for you all

    As you say a real bad trigger situation so a Huge well done HUG for staying smoke free through that little lot

    If you can get through that you can get through anything

    Love

    Marg xxx

  • Damn girl, ship that boy to the southern US and I'll put and old fashioned butt whipping on him. I am raising an idiot teenage boy myself and have a couple of stories I could share with you.

    Seriously, my hats off to you for keeping it together through that. It is perverse to think, did he get sick enough to not drink for awhile. As we say 'round these parts, Ya done good.

    Well, I'm not far from Gatwick so I'll get his butt on a plane! Jeez, kids eh. Thing is, they put him on a drip so he doesn't have a hangover! I wanted him to feel seriously bad today- though he was in a terrible state yesterday. Don't know if it's enough to keep him off the sauce though- peer pressure, hormones and being a fecking idiot are a powerful combination.

    But, I figure if that didn't have me reaching for a death stick, maybe nothing will. I may just be reaching for a big stick though- that and some valium!! If I'd had a clue about kids, I would have just got a dog... :mad:

  • Hi Deedeebel :)

    Oh boy a doozy of a weekend for sure, but glad your son is OK after giving you all such a shock, cut's and bruises will heal and it could have been so much worse for you all

    As you say a real bad trigger situation so a Huge well done HUG for staying smoke free through that little lot

    If you can get through that you can get through anything

    Love

    Marg xxx

    Thanks! It was a horrible shocking sihgt, seeing him all battered and out of it- scared the life out of me. Oh, and ta for the hug, needed that!

  • Wow! Dee, you did so great there, you must be feeling very proud of yourself, if not of your son. What idiots they are at that age.

    Take care and more hugs coming your way. :)

  • well done

    you have had a really rough time and come through it..... brill girl keep it up xxxx sue

  • WOW, that was the trigger of all triggers Dee....

    Hope things settle down soon, honestly kids....a bit like smoking if we knew how hard they would be we would never have started.... ;)

    xx

  • Crikey Crumbs.... Huuuuge pat on the back and a jolly well done.... your a superstar for not giving in!!!!

    we're all strooong together!!! :D xx

  • Well done Dee, having a ciggie would have been the easy option and you never took it, so you should be proud.

  • Well done Dee - if you didn' treach for the ciggies in that situation, you've done it, yea you - seriously well done

  • Thanks friends, but am seriously thinking I must be the poo-est mum ever! But then I get real and think there are mums and dads all over the place dealing with stuff like this- scary horrible stuff! But smoking would not have made anything better, I know that- not that it didn't keep crossing my mind. Honestly though, the reason it was such a strong trigger was that it would have been a reason (excuse) to run away and hide- 'just going for a fag, back in a minute'- just to give me a few more minutes of not dealing with reality. And reality needed to be dealt with right then and there. And, bad though it all was, at least I didn't have a serious addiction tugging at me so I was actually able to focus on my kid 100%.

    A few weeks ago I would have still cared, of course I would, but I would have been thinking 'when and how can I get out for a smoke'. This time, when I had to go out to make a phone call, and the smokers just stank out my space.

    I would rather not be tested in quite such an extreme fashion again though, today I am limp and feel utterly rubbish! All your kind words have been lovely though, so a deep thankyou from the bottom of my (rather bruised) heart. XX

  • Well done Dee you did good:D........a ciggie certainly would not have helped in that situation......... you would of had an extra problem;)

    Bloody kids........... shame he didnt get a hangover;) BIG HUGS FOR YOU!!

  • Well done and a big hug coming your way, that was a serious time to go through, kids can sure get our emotions going. Glad he is better, now you take care of yourself.

    Jackie

  • Ok deedeebel here is mine

    No too far from where I live is the (i think) largest marine base on the east coast. It is day 11 of my quit I am on the last day of a vacation after a hospitalization. My wife's cell phone rings and it is dark outside. It becomes real that the phone is ringing and it is 2:30 in the morning. Do you ever get good news at 2:30?

    On the other end of the phone is Capt. so and so of the United States Marine Corps and they are holding my son and three others. He is wanting to search my son's car and that we must come to the base and retrieve the car because the boy's have been drinking and he will not permit them to leave on their own.

    So....we leave the beach house and head to the base at 3:00. My son was caught in the wrong traffic lane and could not get out of entering a military installation of a country at war at 3:00. THEN someone in the car throws some trash out of the window and THAT is what caused the car to be stopped and searched.

    My son is 17 1/2 and I kept asking for them to just keep him and I would sign the enlistment papers on Monday Morning. Well, I eventually went to a station bought gas, coffee, and a cigar. Yes I smoked it. I know that this telling of this story raises more questions but I can spend all day with this story. Suffice it to say my son is an idiot.

    So you are stronger than I.

  • Teenage boys - who'd have em??

    Deedee you poor girl, what an awful weekend. I can totally sympathise as my 17 year old has spent the past 2 years doing this sort of thing, and worse too. We even packed him off to the far north of Scotland for 3 weeks on an Outward Bound course this summer just to get some peace & quiet. :mad:

    If you can avoid lighting up thru that then you are well on the road to non-smokingness.

  • No too far from where I live is the (i think) largest marine base on the east coast. It is day 11 of my quit I am on the last day of a vacation after a hospitalization. My wife's cell phone rings and it is dark outside. It becomes real that the phone is ringing and it is 2:30 in the morning. Do you ever get good news at 2:30?

    On the other end of the phone is Capt. so and so of the United States Marine Corps and they are holding my son and three others. He is wanting to search my son's car and that we must come to the base and retrieve the car because the boy's have been drinking and he will not permit them to leave on their own.

    So....we leave the beach house and head to the base at 3:00. My son was caught in the wrong traffic lane and could not get out of entering a military installation of a country at war at 3:00. THEN someone in the car throws some trash out of the window and THAT is what caused the car to be stopped and searched.

    My son is 17 1/2 and I kept asking for them to just keep him and I would sign the enlistment papers on Monday Morning. Well, I eventually went to a station bought gas, coffee, and a cigar. Yes I smoked it. I know that this telling of this story raises more questions but I can spend all day with this story. Suffice it to say my son is an idiot.

    So you are stronger than I.

    Blimey, they do put us through it. I also have a 13 year old daughter, can't wait to see what joys she has in store (have already had a couple of blinders from her already). I may run away and hide until they're in their 30's.

    Oh, and my (stupid) son is also disabled, had surgery recently, and has a hospital appointment this Friday- so , just to make this a perfect time for me my boss has asked me to come to a special meeting to discuss my 'unreasonable' request for time off to take him to hospital. So, I may not have a job by the end of the day!! Isn't that great? I've been employed less than a year so have no legal right to unpaid time off for dependant hospital appointments- super!!

    Still not smoking though- but not sure how much more cr*p can hit me this month without me just collapsing completely! :mad:

  • HI Dee

    You may have only been employed for less than a year but it woul dbe a very silly employer to sack someone for taking time off for a disabled dependant child.

    Fingers crossed love, I hope it goes ok..

    L x

  • Just had stupid meeting with stupid boss about stupid day off! Not that I'm annoyed or anything!! Deep breath...

    Anyway, didn't resolve the issue, I said I'm going anyway, we'll just have to wait and see. Super dooper. Sod cigarettes, I may take up crack!

    I'm off to lie down in a darkened room. Forever! :rolleyes:

  • Hmmm. Life is just so super sometimes- today I had one of my accounts removed. So, I got that loving feeling from my employers!! NOT. Fag thoughts running through my head, but then work, kids, all the hard hurtful things in life would be the winners, and I'd be the ultimate loser. Still, it's not a fun time!!

  • Hi Deedeebel :)

    Oh boy you're certainly having a tough time just now and just to cap it all an unreasonable employer sho say's you shouldn't go to a hospital appointment with your disabled son [what an unfeeling brute he must be]

    I'm not suprised you had thoughts of a fag running through your head but well done you as you say then work and all the hurtful things that have happened to you would be the winners at the end of the day

    You've got through all that smoke free so you can get through anything now

    Love and a Hug

    Marg xx

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