HELP PLEASE- Ive Had The Most Awful Day

[nsd_user663_16968]

Hi all

Where do i start. I have had the most awful of days today. Those tablets have made me very angry, aggresive, bad tempered, unable to cope, sad, lonely, depressed, so very fricking tierd all the time, unable to eat properly, hating myself, wanting a cig so so much that i nearly caved in because i felt that i could not cope anymore with my life, i told my OH that i was going to buy a pack of 10 but never did, luckily but whatever these champix have done to my brain they have seriously F*****d me up and now i dont know who i am anymore. I have not give in but OMG i lost it earlier and i ended up going to my Mum in Laws because i just could not cope at home. I spoke to my quit Nurse who said and this is after i had my last cig on the 24th its not the tablets making me feel like this its nicotine withdrawel, FFS she has never smoked so how the hell does she know, i have cancelled tomorrows appt and will go and see her next Tues and she said she will see if i can go onto Zyban as they did not make me feel like this when i last took them and i only stopped because i could not afford the prescription. Otherwise they worked for 4 weeks then because of issues at home i went back to being a smoker.

I have told her that if these tablets keep doing what they have done today and make me want to shoot myself then i may end up giving in but NO WAY WOULD I EVER TAKE THOSE SODDING THINGS AGAIN when you stop and this is me they have seriously messed my head up and i thought i was sane until these. I have even cried on the phone to my OH its been that bad today and i just dont know why, i seriously regret ever going on those Tablets and if this is the withdrawel after 12 days god knows what would have happened if i did the whole course.

I am not going to punish myself if i give in but i hope to stay strong and not do so but today was not an urge as such more like the most powerful being pressing my head against as brick wall and nagging me and nagging me and making me feel that i am stupid and bad and that even if i did have one it wont make things any better but the last straw fo rme was how i nearly flipped at my son who has Learning Problems and today and this is the first time i truely think had i not gone to my mother in laws i would have killed him

Anyhow thats my day guys, been a right shit of a day and now i am just so tierd that i want to sleep and sleep.

LOL

[nsd_user663_17077]

Hi,

I replied on your other post, just wanted you not to think I was ignoring you!

Stay strong and hopefully tomorrow you will feel better

[nsd_user663_16968]

Thank you Genes

I am hoping that too. Its going to be a few days yet before the side effects leave my body but hopefully tonight i will get a good nights sleep.

I will try some hot chocolate or something before bed tonight and see if that helps, i dont want to give in but at the same time its not a craving i felt today it was hatred and anger.

Night hun and thanks for replying its meant a lot to me x

[nsd_user663_14114]

Hi Nuttynurse, sorry to hear you are having a bad day. I havent been on Champix, so have no experience of what its like, but have heard its quite common to get nasty side effects.

Is it possible for you to have a nice relaxing bath, pamper yourself a bit and try to get an early night?

[nsd_user663_14384]

Ohhh dear :-S Bless ya, I soooo hear ALL this!!!

I was on champix, I could have wrote all you just did :-((( I came off them 2 weeks ago and still quit!!!

Sleep, see how you feel tomorrow, I REALLY hope it gets easier, much luv sent to you, I REALLY do feel for you :-((

[nsd_user663_16968]

Thanks Claire and Karen

I am going to finish wrapping the christmas presents i have here, get the kids showered then bed then im going to have a nice bath and try and get an early night.

I dont want to go onto the Zyban that the Nurse suggested earlier as TBH i think by then which is a week away i should be well on my way with this but i dont want to put my body or mind come to that through anymore hell.

I stopped smoking because it was damaging me and i was taking in all those nasty chemicals yet now i have been on those things and in those 12 days i think i have had enough of cigarette and nicotine substitutes or replacements or receptor stoppers i just want to do this with my knitting, reading a good book (thats when it arrives), having you guys to support me along with my family too and just trying to get through this day by day and not by thinking im missing out on something or that im punishing myself.

When i felt really nasty earlier the need for a cig was the most intense of my whole life but now i have calmed down a bit im not even thinking about them, which is good because i dont want to lapse. I also did not want to see the Nurse tomorrow as i feel i need to relax at home first but next week those old champix should be gone and i can go up and just get my levels checked and no more.

Thank you everyone for being there for me. I will have a nice bath later and get an early night.

LOL

[nsd_user663_16474]

Sorry to hear you're having a rough time Jo :(. I've never used Champix so I can't offer any advice really. You have my moral support though and I hope you can get through this. Stay strong and please, please, please don't smoke!!!

Ed xx

[nsd_user663_16968]

Thanks Ed

I am feeling a little happier now and hope that tomorrow i wont feel the same as i did earlier today.

I still have not touched a cig and hope not to either but it took all my might earlier to stop myself from getting one.

Catch ya tomorrow

[nsd_user663_16474]

I'm so glad you're resisting Jo :).

Have an early night. You can't smoke when you're asleep!! You have the strength to get through this Jo.

Hoping tomorrow's easier for you.

Ed xx

[nsd_user663_17077]

I will mirror what Ed said - cannot smoke when you are asleep! You have done a fantastic job resisting!!!

[nsd_user663_16968]

Thank you all my very special and supportive Friends

To all my Very Special Friends that i have made on here and that have been there for me tonight i want to say a very big

THANK YOU

Without your help and support i fear i may have given in and you know i dont want to do that.

I am now off to bed and do hope that tonight i will sleep better and that tomorrow i dont end up that nasty, angry and bitter person that i was today.:confused: I am only glad that no one was hurt when i was like that and i do feel that had my OH been here i would have either started a major argument and ended up being a total bitch to him which is NOT ME im not like that normally. Please, please people anyone considering Champix find out all you need to know before you take them and remember most of my troubles started on day 9 and i was on half the dose, from then it just got worse. If you start to feel strange please stop them as its not worth it.

Night, night all, catch ya all tomorrow

LOL

[nsd_user663_16723]

So sorry you've had such a rough day hun, hopefully tomorrow will be better x

[nsd_user663_17057]

Hi Jo

So sorry you have had such a bad experience with Champix.

I have been taking them for more than a month now, with none of the problems you have described.

Maybe I'm just fortunate, I don't know.

Hang in there girl, be strong.

We are all here to support you.