2 Months Today - Finally Found Courage to Say Hi......

[nsd_user663_9067]

I Found this site a few days before my quit and have been on here religiously every day and I'll be honest I dont think I'd be where I am now if it were not for some of the inspiring messages I've read.

Anyway I'm starting to feel like a stalker now so I'm joining in, I have a lot to say and hopefully a lot to share, so hope I'll be around for a while and it would be great to actually give advice too........as well as recieve it!

I quit with my OH on 8th march, 7 days on patches then a grit determination to starve the little you know what (or Mr Nic O'Tene) I affectionately call him, so cold turkey for 7 weeks.............ouch!!

13 years smoking with a 10 month pregnancy quit, that was easy they smelt disgusting when I was pregnant, no such luck now! My OH is 15 years older than me and he'd been quit for 10 years before he met me then started again and spent the next 11 years smoking with me, how bad do i feel now!

I really wish I had started a journal when I quit as I can honestly say it has been quite simply the most life changing thing I/we have ever done..............there have been some/lots of rock bottom moments and even a blip at 5 weeks (2 drags) I am ashamed to say, but well I thought I'd share some happy and positive things that quitting smoking has done for us............

* To be able to breathe, I mean TRULY breathe all the way to your lungs

* I am an anxious, nervous person and smoking did NOT relieve them feelings, however, quitting has, I am so calm and relaxed I dont know myself

* Everything is growing really quick - Hair, nails.........bank balance!

* My OH stopped getting chest pains and instead of grey skin it is now glowing peachy

* Food tastes awesome and theres never any waste, food is actually appreciated instead of just taken for granted

* Our gorgeous 4 year old boy has had the pleasure of 2 happy and healthy parents who arent thinking about nipping out for a fag! Watching him sit alone through the kitchen window while we indulged the stinking habit was one of the final straws!

There are tons more benefits I could go on for ever!

I will stress though that as much as being a non smoker is fabulous, we are nowhere near out the woods yet and still get some nasty craves, even worse sometimes just thoughts that last all day or even more, I have had a real problem with identity.........feeling I am not me, like i've lost a part of who I am. There are also cons to a partnership quitting together, yes its great to talk to each other and share feelings, but theres been days when he is climbing the walls and Ive been fine and then his negativity rubs off on me or vice versa!

We will continue on this journey as the rewards FAR outweigh the hopefully temporary discomforts.......it is great to know you can log onto this site and be in the company of others going through exactly the same hell as yourself ha ha!

I'm stickin my fingers up at the Tobacco companies! We are keeping our £260.00 a month THANK YOU VERY MUCH!! And I just love walking past the cigarette kiosk at Tesco........so empowering!!

Going to celebrate 2 month milestone later with a yummy Sunday Roast and a lovely glass of Asti.............GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONE xxx

[nsd_user663_10532]

Hi Shelly

so glad you decided to post, I am pleased it is going so well for you and OH. Like you, I don't know where I would be without this forum, they keep me going.....keep posting, it really helps

[nsd_user663_8421]

Hi Shelly.

Congrats on your quit and well done for coming out and sharing here. You have cheered me up this morning. I love walking past that long queue at the smoking kiosk in Asda or Tesco knowing that I don't have to join it!

[nsd_user663_4786]

Hi and welcome, a fantastic post and congrats of your 2 months. It is an amazing feeling just to be able to breath deeply

As already said above, there is always someone around to help you out if necessary and to pat you on the back as you climb further up the ladder away from the evil weed.

Good to have you on board, read loads and post often.

[nsd_user663_8876]

Hi Shelly, glad you came out from hiding. I love your positive attitude - thats great. We quit around the same time and trust me i know how dark the cold yturkey can be too. Not nicve but worth it. As for that empowering feeling you mention i've never thought of it like that but i guess it is.

[nsd_user663_9067]

Thank you all for such a lovely welcome, it sure feels better to be around others all trying to achieve the same monumentus task of being a non smoker!

Well I'm glad I sounded so positive, it just shows really how things can change because weeks 5 to 7 were absolute hell and I never thought i could get through the constant thinking about cigarettes and actually missing being a smoker but I did and then up till now I've been great........until today!

My biggest worry about not smoking is that I may be just one problem or stressful moment away from starting again........not a very positive attitude I know but I've kept a low profile whilst quitting, trying to avoid any situations that may become stressful or upsetting and so far so good, you see it was the sudden death of my father that started me smoking again on my previous quit.

Anyway cut a long story short, there is some concern in my area with a proposed settlement of travellers, obviously I've been a bit worried about it but kept my head down and got on with things and kept myself to myself, well today they approached my OH and made an accusation that I have complained to the council about them, this has unsettled me, firstly it is untrue, secondly I am thinking one of my neighbours has tried to pass the buck maybe. Anyway I feel insecure, angry but most of all I want a cigarette, because thats what I would have done 2 months ago.

I know it wont help and it wont resolve anything, but these are times when I most miss smoking.......when I am upset or anxious!

Sorry I dont want to come across as up and down but just had to put my feelings today down into words and distract myself, I'm going for a walk, I will get through this crappy day, I refuse to let someone I dont know be responsible for me taking up that stinking habit again!! I am just so cross that here I am getting on with being a busy mum and quitting smoking etc and someone comes along and ruins my day!

Sorry for the rant but i feel slightly better already, and to anyone else having a horrible day...........chin up we can get throught it without cigarettes!

Love Shelly xx

[nsd_user663_8876]

Your allowed to come across as up and down on here without having any guilt attatched to that and yes going out for a walk and keeping that strong positive attitude will sort you right out.

[nsd_user663_10532]

Shelly, you can rant as much as you like, this site is for you and me and ppl like us. If you have a good day then post, if it's bad then post that as well. It helps the people starting out, it will show that it is not all plain sailing and they will have to be on their guard. As to others making you smoke, I say that to the OH, but in the end it is you who will light that ciggie, and relight that addiction. Please try and find another way of coping, like you did by walking. I come on here in times of need, just reading everyones post takes my mind off everything. Keep up the good work, you have done so well. You can get through this and you will, big hugs coming your way ((((hug)))))

[nsd_user663_7469]

Hi to Shelly and OH

I am right behind you with a push every now and then to keep you going in the right direction, up the smoke free road to Penthouse Way and as far as I am concerned you wouldn’t be on here if it was easy to quit would you.

This site is 80% responsible for my quit being as strong as it is, I could not have done it without the support that I have found on here and that is why I continue to come on and try and support others who are also trying to become smoke free and smell good.

As for the travellers if they threaten you or any member of you family the best way to deal with them is if you see them coming take out your mobile phone and act as if you are talking to someone and then if they do come up to you, tell them that your friend who you are talking to will be a witness to whatever they say, that will soon deter them.

I lived in a village a few years ago just outside Leicester and they wanted a site just on the edge of the village and we all petitioned the gov and they didn’t get it but they were a pain while they were in the area, not saying they shouldn’t have some were to live the same as us all but they sometimes go about getting it in the wrong way, and sometimes they alienate themselves from us before they start, try not to worry your quit will be good and glad OH is there with you which as you said not always easy best wishes to u both.