well here I am approaching month nine tomorrow and what a weekend it has been. I am coming up to a time of year when I have always smoked and things are proving hard! I actually stood in the shop on friday night staring at the cigarettes for about 5 minutes arguing in my head reasons why or why not to buy some. the shop girl even asked if I was ok. I didnt buy any but I can feel myself weakening. it worried me really cos that is seriously the closest I have been to buying any. Im going to spend my time back on the forum and reading, reading, reading as I have had thoughts like if I still feel like this in the morning I will buy some! oh dear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I will not give in to this horrid addiction, not a single puff but my god its hard at the moment and I need my forum support more than ever.
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This is my first proper quit (one where I intend to continue) and reading your post, I'd like to say thanks for your honesty. Whilst it's encouraging to read the majority of posts where people are so positive and know it's the right time, and this quit is the one, it's also refreshing to be reminded we are only human and that the lure is still there no matter how far down the smoke free road we are on.
I believe what you felt (even to the point of stopping and staring at the tobacco kiosk for so long) is normal and part of this learning curve.
You moved on.... and your back here recognising it for what it was... a moment in time, a moment that passed but could easily have been otherwise. But it wasn't.... and you've got yourself to thank... and me in time to come, to thank you also.
thanks for your reply, I feel that I can deal with it better now, I know that I need to indulge myself in this forum, the advice from others and am currently reading the woofmag stuff which helps. Its truely a re-education and Ive spent all my adult life smoking so this is a first for me, christmas with no fags, will I miss them?, hell yes but would I go back to them, no way!! my boyf has just said how proud he is of me to be doing all this to help my quit.
I know if I had smoked this weekend I would be back to 20 a day by friday
its flipping hard but I know its worth it, I just wish the nic demons werent in my head
So glad you stayed strong.... tomorrow you'll feel better, I'm sure of it. Had a trigger myself a month or so ago, and I know what you're saying, it was hard..... but as quickly as it came, it passed.........
Don't look at fags longingly..... remind yourself that for many years you made up lies about smoking. They did not make you feel better, they did not relieve boredom, etc, etc.......... you smoked because each time a fag was finished, withdrawal hit in, and you needed another. That feeling of relief when you finally had one helped to build these wrong associations. You are free of it now! Go look at them fags but think 'god, I'm glad I don't HAVE to buy them any longer.
These triggers are the reason why everyone says 'don't become complacent'.... just be aware but don't worry..... you've got a good quit going, remind yourself of all the things you've gained and those thoughts of wanting one will fade very quickly.
First congratulations on almost 9 months smoke free Big Hug for you
I'm so sorry you had a tough weekend and stood staring at the fag counter arguing with yourself about buying some but you didn't give in to that urge and I know just how hard that was
I think though that you've answered the reason yourself in that this time of the year is when you always smoked so I think was was just a bad trigger crave for you but you got through it and that's great if this happens again it won't be as hard for you to beat it off
But we're all here for you as you well know but yes do some reading and remind yourself of the reasons you stopped in the first place they're just as relevant now as they were nine months ago
I so hope you feel better and stronger again today
But I think you might be right, the festive season, plenty of food and drink, all of a sudden a perfectly good quit can be ruined because of the little nico demon saying "oh just one puff won't hurt". We all know it will, we've mostly all tried quitting before, if we hadn't taken just one little frigging puff we wouldn't have needed to stop again.
Lets not forget all the other things that might be making us feel that a fag is a way to get some relief, it's Monday, it's winter, it's been attrocious weather and most of us haven't seen the sun for ages.
I don't want to be in day one again, the first few days are hard but even now we're still relearning, perhaps Marg and the other 1 year + people can shed some light on how life is when you've faced most triggers once - such as christmas.
You have been given the good advice and you are reading to help, I wish to say well done you for getting past that big trigger and not letting it take over, big pat on back.
Throught the hardest times of my quit you have always been here to offer support, guidance and advice. I have this forum to thank for my success as I am able to articulate and educate myself on here that I cant do anywhere else, it has been invaluable!!
I spent the evening last night reading and talking about how that trigger had just got me thinking about fags again.
Thankfully I am so much better today and will be better prepared to deal with this if it happens again.
To the people that have always been there through my quit and the new people that have replied to my message this weekend, a huge thank you for taking the time to help. I really appreciate it and hope that I can be of help to you when you need it.
I am on 9 months and heading for 10 and I have had a few pangs in the last month but I am not fearful of Christmas because its alot easier than it used to be with smokers banished to the far corners of the pub gardens!
Sorry I missed your OP, but I am so pleased to see that you got past that moment and the temptation. Use that strength to help you through.
Really chuffed that you have reached 9 months quit. It seems to be going so quickly now. Can't remember the last time I had a smoke-free Christmas and so I am really looking forward to this one - it'll be a pleasure not to head off outside every so often when everyone else is having a nice time in the warm!
Nog, thanks for your post! Im always right behind you x
Chrissie thank you for your messages the last few days and that link is one I am defo going to print off
Deke, a fellow MMQ, always lovely to hear from you and thanks for your support
Im much better but I know there are testing times ahead so after reading an inspirational quote from stuarth i am off to talk to myself in the mirror and might just get one to have in my handbag!!
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