So far so good - but its been hard

Hello guys.

This is my first post. I'm a 37 year old male, I started smoking about 12 years ago, yeah a late starter - stupid - I got pressured by somebody

at work. Even though both my parents smoked (both have quit now) I had always managed to resist it. But this person at work

got me started, back in the days when you could smoke in the office and I became an addict fast. :(

I started with Bensons & Hedges, then moved onto rolling Drum, Cutters Choice and Samson and then since around 2003 I've stuck with rolling Amber Leaf. At one point I was smoking 40 bensons a day, nowdays a pack of amber leaf lasts me about two days,

On Saturday 21st Feb 2009 I purchased a pack of Amber Leaf from my local tesco, opened it up on the Sunday to discover a pack

filled with rolled up newspaper, yep 12 grams of finest rolled up local newspaper, and the real kicker, an empty pack of red

rizla, not even proper amber leaf papers.

The pack seemed perfectly normal from the outside, right down to the the red pulling strip around the pack. It was only

afterwards that the top of the box felt a bit strange, like dry glue, but before the wrapping had been removed it felt

normal and nobody would ever suspect anything was wrong with it.

I was gob smacked, somebody went to a lot of time and trouble to fake a £2.6 pack of hand rolling tobacco. I took the pack

back to Tesco on the monday, got a refund and the checkout women said she had seen it once before. She took some details

and said I would receive a letter from Amber Leaf but I never did.

Anyway, on that day (the Sunday) I vowed never to smoke EVER again. If somebody can tamper with a pack so convincingly well

who know what where smoking and to be honest from that day its been hell.

The first 3 days Sunday, Monday and Tuesday I was climbing the walls. Its hard to explain in words but its like my mind was

playing tricks on me, almost like talking myself into smoking again, trying to convice myself into having a smoke.

I'm creating some computer software at home in my spare time (taking some time out of work) so you can imaging I can just

light up any time I like, unlike being in an office, and on the Wednesday I caved in and couldn't stand the withdrawal any


What I'm about to say will make you feel sick but....I emptied the old nubs out from my bit bin and rolled them into a new

rollup !sick!. After doing that I felt better but I also felt disgusted with myself and I've not smoked any since.

So this is about six weeks now.

The cravings are getting easier to manage. I get them but they don't seem to last very long maybe a few minutes each about

once an hour. I can live with the cravings but the problem is I've started to eat more, a lot more, I just cant stop munching.

So thats my next habit to kick.

I have tried stopping in the past but always broke down and gave in after about 3 days, this time I am determined to say

an ex smoker. I think its because what happened made me WANT to quit in my heart of hearts and not just TRY to quit

and I've gone cold turkey with no help.

Anyway thats my reason for stopping.

6 Replies

  • Welcome NubBuster,

    Good first post there, certainly tells the story......

    You've made the right decision in stopping, you are also through the worst ..... WELL DONE !!!:D

    Eating for me is not a problem, lol you should have seen my posts last night.... I'd had a few beers first time since quitting some real munchies lol

    There is loads of good advice on this forum and loads of good links to info to help you on your way up the stairs to success....

    Take every minute/hour/day as it comes :cool:

  • Welcome Nubbuster

    Congrats on your quit so far 6 weeks is great work. You have come to the right place here lots of advice and support. You are over the worse now. Have a read of some of the links in peoples post.xxxxx

  • Hi NubBuster :)

    Welcome to the forum and well done on the decision to quit possibly one of the most important you will ever make and you will be losing nothing but you will regain control of your life and that has to be good

    You will find all the help and support you need on here as we all help each other just like a family we are here for you every step of the way cheering the good days and sympathiseing with the bad but the good far outweigh the bad

    Read the posts on here you will find a lot of tips and advice and in the signatures of a lot you will find links to other sites just click on them Here are 2 I find very good to start you off and Read, read and then read some more as the more you read and learn about why you smoked and about your addiction the easier your quit will be

    Well done quitting already that's great and what a great post that is but it wasn't your mind telling you to smoke it was those sneaky b......d Nico :eek: Demons trying to get you back in their power

    Post often let us know how you are getting on we are all here for you whenever you need us for whatever reason, to have a rant, ask for help pretty much anything goes on here

    Good Luck


  • Hi there NubBuster,

    Welcome to the forum and well done on deciding to kick the evil weed.

    You will find nothing but support here and we all look out for eachother.

    Good luck!

    Lottie -x-

  • Hi NubBuster,

    6 weeks is great,well done.

    Try some exercise or walking to deal with your weight increase.

    It will feel great giving your healing lungs a workout.

  • A little late, but thank you everybody for your replies. Still going strong, no smokes, but the hungry feelings are becoming a problem.

    It's not that I'm being greedy, I genuinely do feel hungry. :(

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