The Disbelievers

[MsGelfling1]

When I first got sick, I had to go stay with family in Texas. My mother said I wasn't sick, I just didn't want to work anymore. My sister accused me of coming to Texas to steal her husband. My other sister accused me of trying to weasel in on her family and trying to live for free. Family. Who needs them?

[Tinker-Belle]

Oh, Lord, I can feel your pain. I agree. Some family...who needs them? I tell you, to me, it is not blood that makes family. Not at all. Family, to me, is more about those with whom I can relate or can relate to or understand me. I have given up trying to explain myself to some of my biological family. That doesn't mean I don't care about them. Stress just takes such a toll on me that I have to accept and love them from a distance. I've never had anybody tell me they don't believe I have MS but I do have those family members who are so prone to embellishing everything in their lives, they assume I do the same. Or, even others who believe that if I simply had a more positive attitude or practiced some of their self help techniques, I could make it all go away. Sorry, that's not the way it works. The people who choose to live life with me day in and day out know and understand the struggles a lot better. And, amazingly, they don't seem to think I'm such a Debbie Downer! Good luck with your journey. Only you know how you truly feel. Try not to let those who can't understand be a stumbling block.

[CraigS]

That’s terrible! I’m so sorry that your family is so lacking of compassion for your disease. In my case, I’m the one who felt that way about my symptoms until they actually put a name on them. I thought it was all in my head. Friends would tell me that I’m not trying hard enough to walk properly. I think they meant well and it was really their fear for me that caused that kind of reaction.

Is there someplace else you could go?

With all the crap associated with coping with this damn disease, added stress from family is not helping at all.

I wish you well and peace in your life.

We all struggle in our own way.

But it sure would be nice to have a little understanding.

C

[MsGelfling1 in reply to CraigS]

Craig, Life is better now. I live in NC, I have a very healthy income from the military, and things aren't bad at all anymore. I own my own 4 bedroom house. Now I have all the room and freedom I can ask for.

[Jesmcd2 CommunityAmbassador]

Hugs to you MsGelfling1 it can be destrssing that' for sure! The summer before dx, my leg was spasming so badly, and I was sleeping so much. My bf thought I was faking it. 😒 We had no clue. I actually gave him an out, when I found out. ☺🤣

When I did find out, my mother hung up on me, to call her Dr because she was convinced SHE had it. 😒

So family's are just, what's the word? Intricate? Toxic,? A pain? But our own. 😊

But I'm still not calling her!🤣🤣

J🌠

[WAshingtongirl]

This saddens me, MsGelfling1 . I can only imagine how heartbreaking this is to you. MS causes enough loss as it is. One shouldn’t have to grieve the loss of those who should be there for us when we most need it. But in all honesty, your family’s attitude can’t be blamed on your MS...Hopefully your family members will become less self-focused one day, and come around and be there for you. I pray you have a few good friends you can lean on. We’re always here to listen, commiserate, and encourage. 💕

[kymrob91457]

A long time ago I read a short message about people with MS. It said...Surround yourself with people who love and support you, and are a positive influence on your state of mind! That sentence say's a lot! I had to distance myself from my own daughter. I don't talk about my MS, I don't complain, or wine about it. If I have a bad day, I deal with it in silence. My daughter made a comment, she said..."I'm sick and tired of hearing about you're sick pathetic disease." She's 40 years old, single, and has no kids. She broke my heart. Don't allow people to treat you like that. I'm 60 years old, and have had MS for 32 years. Still fighting....quietly!

[Qt314grl]

I agree with everyone above. Family doesn’t have to be blood related to you. I hope you find your tribe soon. It’s hard enough wondering if you are crazy with all the symptoms but to have someone else doubt you truly sucks.

[Babslover]

MsGelfling: I like the responses you are getting. People just need to step back before they start ridiculing this situation you have. Why do people have to be so ridiculous? Know what you can do and please keep up with this website. We all care for each other. 🙏👍