False memory OCD, Is not always false

[RUtalkingtome]

My memories of troubling encounters are not false or exaggerated, although my reaction to those encounters can be exaggerated because of how I let an unpleasant encounter traumatize me.

Whenever I have an encounter that's worrisome it's Iocked in my memory forever; and by revisiting the memories they become more engraved in my brain. I read somewhere that revisiting bad memories is like creating garden pathways; the more you walk on them the more clearly defined they paths become, which prevents overgrowth on the path. In other words, the memories remain clear and uncluttered.

Recently I wrote about what occurred when I passed someone in my town who gave me the stink eye. I told my wife, best friend, therapist and wrote about it here, and the memories haven't changed. Years from now I will remember what happened and it will not vary one iota.

I get upset when someone questions my memory on something; like someone asking me after a torrential downpour if I'm 100% sure it rained.

The problem with OCD, or at least my theme, is how I process these encounters that are contrary to how normal people process them.

My exaggerations come from what might happen as a result of unpleasant encounters that normal people never give a second thought. I worry about the uncertainty of what could happen to me even though people close to me say I did nothing wrong, over and over again.

We all make mistakes and sometimes put people off, but everyone does that unintentionally at times, we're not perfect people; again, how we process these things is our struggle. These encounters happen everyday for people without OCD and they go about their lives without worry.

I remember a period in my life when my OCD was locked away, dormant, and things were normal -- so I know the difference. I need to get back there.