can someone help

[lilith99]

I've had ocd since my childhood and it has never affected my relationship with other people till last week. For the record I've been in a relationship for over 8 months. However, a few days ago I suddenly remembered something i've done. I keep going back to the memory but i cant remember whether it happened before me and my boyfriend were dating or not. The possibility of it happening while we were dating makes me feel very guilty and even though we talked about it i don't wanna seem like a cheater in his eyes. I would never do such a thing. But then again why am i suddenly remembering this after 8 months? Why not before? Anyways he just wants us to be normal but i cant act normal while feeling all this guilt i dont know how to not think about it. Anyone had a similar experience?

[RUtalkingtome]

This OCD flareup will run out of gas and you and BF will be fine. Just don't burden your BF while this episode runs its course.

[lilith99 in reply to RUtalkingtome]

yeah we decided not to talk about it but i just cant let it go in my mind like what if it actually happened while we were dating

[Sallyskins]

These sorts of thoughts come into other people's minds, too - other people who don't have OCD! But then, they just dismiss them and don't give them another thought. They realize at once that they've remembered wrong.

It's having OCD that makes us retain these thoughts. Did I really do that, and when? And then we torment ourselves with the thought of 'just supposing if?' and revolve it in our minds until the doubts are out of control.

Letting this intrusive thought go is possible. Other people without OCD do it all the time. It sounds as though your boyfriend trusts you not to cheat on him, and not to have cheated on him. Part of the problem is that OCD weighs us down with guilt - guilt about things we haven't actually done, would not do, and know are wrong.

Accept the trust your boyfriend has in you. Don't push away the intrusive thought - just let it alone, acknowledge it, but don't go over it in your mind. Starved of attention, it will go away of its own accord.