I suffer from contamination OCD have been struggling for 40 years off and on with this and many other forms of OCD. My fear at the moment which is causing so much distress is of radiation not so much of x-rays, phones, etc or things like that but being exposed to radioactive dust. It all stated just after Chernobyl and has been with me ever since. Currently, I have real issues and fears of thorium and anything associated with TIG welding or gas lantern mantles etc. I really believe my fears are real and warranted, they use thoriated welding rods during TIG welding most notably when they sharpen the electrode, yes I fallen for the trap of investigating the subject and trying to reassure myself, I know big mistakes. is there anybody out there with the same fear of being exposed to radioactive dust, I really struggle with the fact the I believe my fears are real, these welding rods exist they have thorium in them etc and I know we breath in radon and exposed to radiation from food and water. I just cant overcome the belief my fears are real then I worry about exposure to my family which makes it worse. I am trying to live with it and accept the anxiety trying not to think about it but my anxiety just wont go away and its making me so depressed.
It feels so real : I suffer from... - My OCD Community
It feels so real
OCD makes things feel real. While I understand what you’re saying, that these are real dangers the vast majority of people don’t think and obsess about it. Are you working with a therapist who specializes in OCD?
Currently no, but in the past have been on medication and joined therapy groups. I've used many of the strategies employed to treat OCD but always seem to fail and not last and fall back into bad habits or a new fears develop. I am also finding that the the anxiety just wont go away even when I try to fight the obsessions and compulsions I'm finding the older I get the harder it is to fight this thing.
look up Shannon Shy. He has written some books and gives advice on Facebook , YouTube and Instagram. He is a former marine who was very ill with OCD. He shares his story and how he became basically symptom free to OCD. He has helped me. Maybe he can help you.
I have had it forever too! I even underwent surgery for it , which worked for a while but then I had a relapse which I blame for several reasons, besides changing my med and a lot of stresses at once. I am trying to get surgery again for it. However, there are more up to date treatments that you could try such as magnetic therapy (which affects the release of serotonin which is affected in OCD (there are different forms of OCD as well as severity and you sound like me because I have tried different types of therapy at OCD clinics too and it only worked after the surgery. There is also implant surgery that has helped many people where a device like a pace maker is placed in your head and when one feels anxious it stimulates the brain to release serotonin (similar to drugs) to make a person calm down etc. I know the Mayo Clinic and some other places do it after qualifying for the program and it is covered by some insurances. It won't work for me only because of the older type of surgery I had before it was available (that figures!). Vagus nerve stimulation is another, but newer area that is being tried, but still may be in the experimental stage unlike the others mentioned. I hope this helps you.! OCD has so interrupted my life but don't give up hope !
Just to add my contamination fear is about germs! Though ironically, I never got Covid, probably because I was super prepared, my OCD habits and I have no problem with vaccines or wearing a mask !
I remember washing my hands until they bled when I was 15 years old. Now its transferred to radiation. I will never forget the day when sitting in my car, window down in traffic and feeling something touch my hair, I was next to a truck with one of of those shipping containers, it was just after Chernobyl and for some reason I cant explain the thought came to me that the container had come from that area and radioactive material had fallen on my head from the container
I'm sorry you're having trouble right now. I really am. OCD is horrible.
One thing that took me a while to understand is that OCD is a "feeling" problem not a "thinking" problem. If we didn't have an emotional response to the thought it wouldn't bother us! People with OCD think that if they can just find a solution for the thought it will go away. This isn't true though. If you do find a solution another thought will arise, then another, and another.
Have you tried talking to a doctor or therapist about what you're feeling? I know for me things started to change when I was just honest with my doctor. He prescribed some medicine and I asked him to refer me to a therapist. It was hard (I found out I'm very sensitive to the medication and that caused some awful issues, but that's another story) and took time but I'm in a lot better place now than I was before. Just keep trying to move forward.
Also, not to offer you reassurance, but I've known people who've worked in nuclear reactors and would set off Geiger counters. The amount of radiation they had was way higher than anyone would receive in a lifetime and they were fine.
One more thing. I don't know if what you believe in, but I've found that giving up control to a higher-power has been very beneficial to me. I think one of the traits of people with OCD is that they feel they must control the situation in order to be "safe", whatever that means. Trusting that God and/or the universe has a plan and is looking out for us takes us away from that need to control. That also is something that is not easy to do but I've found that there is truth in it.
Anyway sorry for the long post. I truly hope you find the peace you're searching for friend. May God bless you.
Thanks for your reply. Been on medication and attended therapy sessions. You cant drop your guard because as soon as you open the door its floods. The hardest part for me is that I do believe in God but cant trust him in this area, it makes me want to cry. Here we have a God who created the universe and us yet I don't show enough faith to hand it over to Him. He has our days numbered but there just seems to be this barrier in my mind.
Don't beat yourself up. God loves all his children even though we may have problems facing Him. I don't know if this helps, but you are part of His plan and God doesn't make plans that fail 
Even though it may be hard, you are exactly where you need to be right now, feeling exactly what you need to feel right now. I believe that all our suffering will be made understandable to us in the end. I hope you start to feel better. I really do. I know how hard OCD can be and make us feel. My heart goes out to you. God bless you my friend. ❤️
Thank you again for your kind words. Sometimes I feel God has given me this condition to keep from being prideful and self conceited, something like he did to the apostle Paul. I know that when I am down and low I tend to reach out to God and prayer more. Sometimes I feel ashamed to ask God to relieve me of this condition knowing the suffering which our Christian brothers and sisters are enduring in parts of Asia and Africa some even being murdered for their beliefs.
OCD is OCD. We talk about different types of OCD or themes but these aren’t diagnostic categories. OCD is a diagnosis though. It will latch onto something that we value but have doubt or uncertainty related to it. Jon Grayson, Ph.D., is one of the top OCD experts. He also wrote the book Freedom from OCD which is one of the books most recommended by OCD experts. He says that for someone to have long-term recovery from OCD they need to accept uncertainty and realize they are capable of handling distressing events. The core fear that underlies a person’s OCD also needs to be addressed otherwise OCD can show up again as a different type or theme. The person ends up playing whack-a-mole as the OCD puts on a different appearance. The different appearance is a different type or theme but it’s still OCD. You can learn more about core fears in his book using the downward arrow method. Liz McIngvale, Ph.D., another OCD expert has talked about core fears in a couple of the IOCDF Ask the Expert livestreams. Those recordings can be found on the IOCDF channel on YouTube.
Thankyou for your advice. Believe me I try but its not only anxiety but and I am being honest my whole body starts to itch when I feel I have come in contact with radioactive dust. OCD is so cunning as you know, it starts to target your family by scaring you into thinking they will be hurt as well. I should know all the tricks OCD plays but right now I'm weak and tired of fighting this thing for the last 40 years. I am starting, very slowly, to accept that it will always be part of my my life and these feelings are part of me which I have to accept rather than fight and hope they go away.
Not what you're looking for?
You may also like...
feeling guilty - real event ocd
Feeling so alone in this journey
I know we aren’t supposed to look for reassurance - I just feel so alone…Any input is appreciated.
Intrusive thoughts and real events
Moral OCD vs. Real problems?
Gentle Reminder: We are so much more than our OCD
Thinking things aren't real. Anyone else? 
