Fear of Cultural Misappropriation

[mvillarreal]

Hi, everyone. So to give some background, I am spiritually fluid. I mix and match spiritualities into my own in ways that are meaningful to me and that (to the best of my knowledge) are respectful of the traditions from which they come, and I never claim that these traditions are mine or try to use them to get recognition or sell anything. Lately, however, I'm hesitant to do any spiritual practice other than praying and petting my cat because I worry that I might misappropriate or am already doing so. The mixing and matching of spiritual traditions has been an important part of my life for several years now, and I love learning and connecting with the sacred through it, but I'm scared of being oppressive or insensitive to the cultures from which I am borrowing. The anxiety is so bad that it's hard to focus on anything else, makes me nauseous/makes me dry-heave, and is making me obsessively research what constitutes cultural misappropriation. Meditation is also an important part of helping myself with anxiety, but if that's my sole motive-utterly divorced from the Indian goals of Nirvana or Moksha, am I being disrespectful by doing that? It's hard because the boundaries are so grey, and I can't stop obsessing.