Spouse OCD making me crazy

[G3723]

Hello- my bf of 15 yrs has OCD. He is super obsessive about MONEY. And time. Where am I and what am I doing. How much everything costs all the time. It’s exhausting. I don’t know what to do. He is irrational.

[Hidden]

Hello! Curious if he knows he's irrational when his OCD kicks in?

Maybe just being genuinely honest and gentle about the approach and call him out on it?

Or set the expectation before he has a chance to compulse? (essentially beat him to it...example is what my husband does when i go OCD crazy. He will warn me that he will be making a mess in the kitchen but it is HIS mess and he will take care of it HIS way on HIS time schedule. Hard for me to go in and try to muddle in his process casually after that.(always cleaning up around him constantly). So, your example would be... I am making a run to the store and then i may or may not check out that park for a walk. The park is an extra 10 minutes away and i will walk for 20 minutes or so. I will spend 30 bucks at the store.... you get it. A few times might show good faith and certainly helps me with my quirky ocd's when my hubby does it.

[G3723 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you. I appreciate you reaching out. He knows his actions are driven by OCD about 10% of the time- when it gets bad. He doesn’t want to accept that his day to day behavior is beyond how most people think and live.

We have talked openly about it. Sometimes there’s just no denying it and he will actually be vulnerable and open up and talk about it. The rest of the time he is telling me what to do, how to do it, or that I am doing it wrong. I am super patient but it is wearing me down. Certain things he can “look the other way” like my car isn’t spotless inside and out. It makes him a little crazy. But he just avoids getting in it and even looking at it in the garage. (By no means is it a mess.). I guess I’m just exhausted and being quarantined together is really draining on me.

[Hidden in reply to G3723]

I'm sorry!

This pandemic has really been a tricky situation.