I feel so alone

[Clare1987]

Hello I’m new here just came on to meet/char to people in similar situations as me. Me and my husband have been ttc for 2years unsuccessfully. My husband has had tests and he is fine. He also has an 8year old daughter. I have had various tests etc and seem to have unexplained fertility. I have been told I am not entitled to IVF in the nhs due to my husband having a daughter already which seems so unfair, almost like I am being punished for the person I fell in love with. I feel so alone and I really don’t think my husband has a clue how I’m feeling I find it very difficult to talk to him. A close friend and colleague both recently announced their pregnancy’s and although I’m happy for them I’m sad for me I can’t tell my husband this because he will think I’m selfish. I have my husbands brothers child’s first birthday coming up and I’m already trying to think of a good enough excuse so that I can avoid it. I just cannot put myself in those situations at the moment it’s too hard.

[wendyWaz]

Hi there!

You are not alone, I also have I unexplained infertility, like many of us here. It has been a number of years since we stopped Ivf. It does get easier, if you do have to stop ttc, it sounds like the decision might be out of your hands. When you do make that decision we are here for you. For now you may be better on Infertilty network site? This maybe why you haven't had a reply yet. It's hard I know. Tc for now.

[sw74]

Hi Clare

Please ignore the stupid comments you have received here about surrogacy and adoption - they have been reported!

I am in the same position as you - my husband has children from his first marriage, and although he desperately wanted a child with me, our infertility just can't have had the same effect on him. When we found out I was infertile, he told me that we would have a great life together and a child would be a "bonus". And that has summed it up for me ever since - to me it is everything and to him it is just a bonus because he already has 2 and has been through all the joy of that already. It's worse because I don't have much of a relationship with his children so I don't see myself involved in their lives in the future.

You're not selfish for being upset that others get pregnant easily. And you definitely don't need to go to baby birthday parties if you don't want to - you need to look after yourself - for me that means not putting myself in situations which I know will make me feel bad!

[Alessia]

Hello dear! Welcome to the board! I am really sorry to hear about your situation. I feel you! I am going through pretty much the same. This can devastate you... Indeed, no one but people who suffer from something like that can understand you. However, do not discourage! It won't be easy for you. As it is not for any of us. Where there is will there is always a way. You can achieve pretty much anything that you want. You just have fight hard enough. I would love to chat with you! I am looking for some more friends too. I have met some great people here. (Looking at you @AllWeNeedIsLove) You will definitely experience the same. Wish you all the best in the world. Stay strong and keep fighting. God bless you!

[Hidden]

Hi there. Hope you are doing fine now. I know you are going through a tough time. It's really sad. I know infertility is very hard to bear. You have to calm down. I know it the happiness of others made you feel deprived. It's natural. But you have to face it all with bravery. I am sure everything will be fine soon. Things take time but will surely be fine soon. Good luck to you. God bless you.