So I was at work on a night yesterday, and felt anxious ALL NIGHT. Was a horrible tight feeling in my chest and fearful feeling. Kept wanting to go to a room alone and hide away to cry but don't have the option in a labour ward. It was very quiet and I had no one to look after which probably made things worse. I had what I think is my first panic attack on sunday night and am very aware of this anxiety now. I ended up being sent home from work an hour early because my pulse was 130bpm.
Anyway, I was walking through the main corridor during my shift and saw a piece of grey paper folded up on the floor, no one was around. On it was a bit of handwriting. It said
"mood gym" CBT therapy.
I still can't quite believe the co-incidence of finding a handwritten note about CBT when I am feeling in such despair and hopeless to be honest.
I typed MOODGYM into google at work when I had a minute and it is an Australian website that has interactive CBT workbooks and such stuff. I read the first few pages and it's almost like the website was made for me. It seems to hit the nail on the head that other websites haven't managed (present website excepted). I had to leave it there but just woke up and went online again to start the exercises.
I cant recommend it highly enough. I've only done the first module but its made more sense to me than anything else so far. Here's hoping it really is as good as it seems (positive thinking and all that)
I hope maybe this helps someone else to, I am so grateful to the person who dropped that little piece of paper.
I also just want to apologise to the lovely people who have replied to my previous blogs. I'm sorry I dont reply to your lovely and understanding comments. When I'm really low I tend to just hide into my own little world and don't find it easy to interact, even on here but I hope you know I really do appreciate your kind words.