Feeling alone and isolated.....

[Diminished]

I've been feeling distant and empty for a while now.. I'm married to a gorgeous guy & I have 2 amazing children and a fabulous standard of living....So why do I feel so empty & alone?.. Have booked an appointment to see my Dr tomorrow, to discuss my feelings & look for some diagnosis...I've taken the depression/mood test and I am a 16.. I haven't lost my libido and have a good sex life with my hubby but I have turned to talking on forums to strangers, mainly males seeking attention/compliments...Why???

[Hidden]

Hi

I'm sorry you are feeling empty and alone and it sounds like you have everything yet feel you have nothing. I wonder whether those feelings have been with you any time before perhaps during your childhood. Often things we feel as an adult relate to feelings from the past we have never dealt with.

You talk about talking on forums so it sounds as if maybe you are bored or unsure whether you are loved. Those feelings may go back to childhood or they may relate to a problem in your relationship with your husband. It is hard sometimes to settle for what we have and not want something different but sometimes a small amount of change can bring about a massive improvement in the quality of life. Why not talk first to your husband? You don't say whether you have done that but if you are feeling something is missing perhaps he is too. If you feel unable to discuss how you are feeling with him then that suggests there is a problem in your relationship in which case why not talk with a marital therapist on your own first until you feel able to talk with your husband and ask him to join you.

It is important to sort things out otherwise you may find you become involved with someone else and destroy your marriage only to find you wanted it. Try to sort out your feelings about that relationship first.

Suexxx

[Hidden]

Hi Diminished

I agree with Rose above. You dont want to do something you may regret & ruin what you have now. Put a stop to it before you get too carried away & maybe act upkn what you feel is excitement to then be riddled with guilt & your husband find out.

Trust me its a small world & people like nothing more than to gossip.

My husband done it on me with a womam from Scotland & I found out & we live in Northern Ireland. His excuse was it was my fault for bejng depresses & he could'nt cope with it.

You also need to think how this in turn could effect your children.

Speak to your GP & take it from there.

Good luck.

Jackie xx

[Suzie40 in reply to Hidden]

That's awful Jackie x

[Hidden in reply to Suzie40]

Awk it was 14 yrs ago & although I'm depressed I'm glad it happened. I am happier without him & I have never wanted to get too involved again.

He has remarried & his wife now is on antidepressants. He is not happy in his relationship, my son does'nt get on with his wife & he tells me everything. God forgive me but I just think haha karma's really catchin up with you lol. What goes around comes around.

He does'nt & never will have the closeness my son & I have. He knows this & I think it also hurts him but its no ones fault only his own.

I did forgive him but I could'nt forget so I asked him to leave, there was nothing left between us.

Jackie xx

[Psyche_chick]

Diminished.. you are looking for validation from someone else because you probably feel you are draining your husband with the way you feel! So you are looking for something else, something anonymous to take your fears out on! Does that make sense? I am the same, was abused, now I have a wife and normality I get bored at times, but I know i will never find anyone more understanding and loving.. just ride it out you are just having a dip! And if anything post, post , post on here with people who care about your situation and that can care at a healthier distance! Also, those who understand you. Don't let men on these other sites just tell you what you wanna hear and who aren't bothered for your situation! Hugs xx

[Diminished]

Thank you all for your replies, it helped greatly today to speak to my doctor-initially I did leave hating myself for what I've done to my husband..but

My husband & I have sat down & spoken again about the situation, this time more honestly..I realise trust will take time to come back & with therapy & lots of talking our future is looking promising..it's not all perfect but it's a start.

Thanks again Sue,Jackie & psyche_chick

[Hidden in reply to Diminished]

I wish you both the very best of luck. You have a very understanding husband, hang on to him.

Luv & hugs

Jackie xx

[Diminished in reply to Hidden]

Thanks, I know & I intend to do whatever it takes to rebuild his trust for me..we have 23 yrs of love, laughter & tears behind us with the hope of many more ahead

It won't be easy but I know it's achievable with the right help & support..

Thank you

Xx

Sam

Xx

[Hidden in reply to Diminished]

Thanks for your reply Sam & I'm so happy for you feeling like you do.

Please come & chat to the Group when you feel you need too.

Lots of love & luck sent your way.

Jackie xx