Feeling isolated at work

I've been in my first job since leaving uni for a year now. I thought it was kind of cliquey when I first arrived since they all knew each other but it's now a year and still feels the same way. I work in a lab and have recently transferred from one sub-department to the other. My bosses want be eventually do cross-over work once I'm fully trained in my new area. But this means I feel like I'm in the middle rather than belonging to one team. My first team now hardly talk to me because I'm not doing that work anymore and the new one haven't really accepted me. As in they're all comfortable talking to each other because it's familiar but I just get ignored mostly. Sometimes I'm included in the banter but rarely.

So right now I feel pretty alone and it's causing me to comfort eat. I finish work, go to the shops for dinner stuff, feel low and hungry so buy junk food. My weight has gone right up and I keep coming up with excuses to not exercise. I don't even want to tidy the house or do any kind of hobby. I used to read a lot of books but now I'm struggling to even start.

Now I can't decide whether I need to change my lifestyle and just brave my current position to get enough experience before I can get a better job. Or do I look to change department and join a new team. I get asked what I'd like to do in 5 years time and have no answer.

8 Replies

  • I'm 65 and over the decades I worked in many places. Believe me, the workplace can be vicious. People can be horrible and behave like pack animals. I look back now, and realise that I was bullied in a very insidious way. My view in the end was that we spend a lot of hours at work and if it's making you unhappy, it's not worth staying. However it is your career and income, so it's a difficult decision. I'm trying to say - it's not just you, many people find their workplace tough going. Good luck x

  • Hi,

    If braving your current position until whatever training is complete is bearable - then that sounds like the best bet. Still apply for other jobs now if the training is complete soonish. You shouldn't have much trouble getting a new job as you're a graduate you have a better chance than many.

    The comfort eating has got to stop - you know its a short term relief for a longer term of aggravation. You don't need reminding that. Its just hard to apply the willpower!

    Reading is great, but as the nights are lighter now - why don't you get out in the fresh air if you have a little weight to lose.


  • You're right, I am trying to get walking to more places. It's difficult and sometimes so easy to just not bother but I will keep trying my best.

  • Excellent. Getting off the bus a stop before you should / Parking further away from your destination are all ideas for getting a little more exercise. As is a good old clean up of the home. Im knackered sometimes when Ive finished vacuuming!

    Sue x

  • I'm also on the Thyroid section of HU as I've had an underactive thyroid for 35 years. Depression & anxiety also. I've noticed that I'm far more laid back and unstressed if I'm on a correct /higher dose of my thyroid meds. You could go to your GP and ask/demand a full blood test to include B12, folate, iron, vitD, & maybe even thyroid. Stress depletes the body of vitamins & minerals we need to feel good.

  • Are you saying I need medication to deal with my feeling low? I don't think I mentioned any thyroid issues.

  • No I'm not saying you need medication to deal with feeling low. I'm suggesting that as you say you are overweight & struggling to enjoy work, it just MIGHT be a thyroid issue. Low thyroid affects mood and has around one hundred symptoms. Only an idea. Please don't take my suggestion the wrong way, only trying to help through my own experience. Good luck

  • Ahhh ok, I was confused! I hadn't thought of my thyroid. I may get it checked out.

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