Hello

[JoeGrief]

I lost my wife in November. We were extremely close, she was everything to me. It still feels like it just happened. I've struggled with mental health all my life. Bipolar, Depression, anxiety, ADHD, and possibly OCD. I've been on meds most of my adult life. Losing my wife was a trigger that spiraled my anxiety out of control. I went into health anxiety with obsessive thinking and many fears. I went through 3 SSRI's that all failed. I just started Remeron (direct switch from Prozac) two nights ago because I couldn't take the night sweats, vivid dreams, and insomnia anymore. I hadn't had a proper night's sleep all year. So far I've been sleeping much better, still with sweats and vivid dreams, but glad for the sleep. Anyway, I'm looking for a positive community online, especially since I have a hard time leaving the house (part mental/part I've developed certain physical problems from all this). Reading forums on Reddit just make me more fearful, I find alot of negativity there. Anyway, I'm just supposed to introduce myself. There's alot more, but I think that's plenty for now.