New to the site

Hi everyone, I’m new to the site. I have not had mental health problems for all of my life but in the last couple of years I have found myself in low moods and I’ve just lost my energy and love for things I used to enjoy. I used to love football and want to know the scores and watch the games, now. I couldn’t care less. I used to train at the gym most days, now I struggle to go. I just can’t face it. I feel like a shell of myself just filled with sadness. I’ve never seen any doctor about how I’m feeling. I’ve thought about doing that for the past year but Covid etc. Maybe now is the time because it’s taking control of my life. I’ve jut graduated from university and when I received my results the other day, I felt nothing, no pride, excitement or any of the things expected of an achievement. It’s a miracle I even completed that degree because I couldn’t concentrate for most of it. It’s all bottled up inside of me and no one knows how I’m feeling, not that they’ve asked anyway. Thanks for reading.

[LAAG]

Hello

Sorry to hear you are feeling low. The feelings you describe of feeling nothing sound exactly like my husband.

This is my advice to you; DO NOT suffer in silence. There is help available, in my experience it isn’t as easy to access as the media say but it is there.

Go to your GP and explain how you are feeling. Tell them it isn’t just a passing low mood it has been there for a while. They may suggest you contact talking therapies and/or prescribe you some medication.

You can self refer to talking therapies which I suggest you do as the waiting list is long. You can do this online.

Have you still got access to Uni student services? If you do contact them as they will have things in place and they may be quicker to access.

Have you got a good friend or family member that will go to appointments with you? Sometimes it is good to have someone with you that knows how you are feeling as it can be overwhelming trying to tell someone for the first time.

To me it sounds as if you have depression. Some people need medication to help lift their mood to help them be able to engage with therapy. Some people can work through it with therapy alone. Either way I really recommend therapy like CBT.

I wish you all the best, things will get better. Let us know how you get on x x

[Hidden in reply to LAAG]

Hi LAAG,

Thank you for your reply.

I have taken the first step of contacting my GP and explaining how I am feeling and have been referred to a Mental Health team within the doctors surgery on Wednesday. I'm not exactly sure what that is going to entail, probably a discussion. Even taking the first step of contacting the GP feels like progress. I'm still keeping it to myself in terms of my friends and family for now.

I did try and contact the Uni last year when I was struggling with my studies and it was all getting too much but was really disappointed with their response so I won't go down that route again. They just referred me to websites when I really needed a bit more than that.

In your experience does something have to "trigger" a low mood? There isn't one single thing I can point to and say "ah yes, it's X that is causing it". The way I'm feeling has been gradually getting worse over time is probably the best way I can describe it. It was when I received my final classification of my degree that I have worked hard for over 3 years, I felt absolutely nothing when I opened the email. That in itself has made me think something is just not right with me.

[LAAG in reply to Hidden]

That’s brilliant. Taking the first step is the hardest and it is good your GP has a separate mental health team.

I hear what you are saying about Uni referring you to websites, that generally is the first port of call it is a bit like the self referral to talking therapies. I would do this if you haven’t yet because the GP mental health team may suggest it. You can then say you have already self referred but you feel you need more support. The reason I asked though is that they may have funded therapy they can access for you quicker.

nhs.uk/service-search/find-...

Don’t let anyone fob you off, this sounds awful but it is who shouts loudest longest that gets the help. That’s why I asked if you had a family member or friend that could support you. When you are feeling low you don’t always feel like pushing yourself to keep calling the GP but if you have someone by your side it is easier.

Try not to get hung up on if there was a trigger at the minute as that in itself can torment you. At the end of the day whether there was a trigger or not the treatment is kind of the same. Therapy may find what the trigger was if there was on. There can be other medical reasons, things like thyroid problems can cause low mood. Your GP should really do some bloods to check these things. Again this is another reason to go to your GP regularly especially if things don’t feel like they are improving.

Another old colleague of mine struggled with depression a while back. Since then he has been a great advocate for talking about things openly. He has even given talks where he works about mental health. He has a new t-shirt that he was wearing the other week. He got it here

boysgetsadtoo.com/

I’m not suggesting you buy a t-shirt, although I have thought about getting one myself. There is a page on here with links to websites you might find useful.

Got to go for now to get sorted for work.

[Jmjh]

Hey Kevvv,

You’re not alone! I can totally relate to your story. It took me a long time to pluck up the courage and reach out for help with my mental health. I almost felt embarrassed to admit that I needed help, but there’s nothing wrong with asking for help at all.

I’ve had a corse of ‘talking helps’ therapy and it’s really given me a fresh insight into how to manage my moods.

I initially spoke to my GP and was referred for talking therapy, this could be a good place to start.

I wish you the best of luck!

Jm

[Hidden in reply to Jmjh]

Hi JM,

Thank you for your reply.

I've contacted the GP so taken the first step in terms of help. I'm in the same boat of feeling a bit embarrassed about admitting this to friends or family. I don't want to be a burden either, they have enough to worry about.

[welly10]

Have a chat to your doctor ASAP lots of us feel the same numb about things you used to love.certain signs are there for low mood but a doctor will point you in the right direction do not suffer in silence and hopefully you will find things get better.good luck.

[Hidden in reply to welly10]

Hi Welly,

Thanks for your reply.

Taken that first step now so hoping to get myself lifted from this constant low mood.

[welly10 in reply to Hidden]

Hi kev lots of people still feel stigmatised about it self help books help also your thought process if you like reading the chimp paradox is a good book to read.i listen to positive affirmations which help.as you learn more you will start to see how you possibly your thoughts make you down every one is different.i over think things/ surmise stuff second guess situations lots of things which effect my moods but it's learning to notice these thoughts and change them good luck 👍

[Hidden]

Take care of yourself, try to do the things you usually liked to do (or try something new, only for your well-being) and stay in contact with your closest people (let them know how you feel so you can support each other and be more tolerant towards “wierd/negative” behavior)🤍 And don’t blame yourself for being negative, rather accept that this is a part of life and you will eventually find your way back to joy.