This is less important than it feels,... - Mental Health Sup...

Mental Health Support

31,641 members17,276 posts

This is less important than it feels, but I'd love some supportive words, please!

12 Replies

I volunteered to do a big chunk of work for a volunteer project. The other person organizing the project just asked for a second design in an ugly format, which takes about an hour to perfect. The first design took 2 hours to finish, and as a volunteer, I'm also responsible for personally paying for and producing 1200 copies of the work.

Here's the real issue: I feel disrespected and unheard.

I have felt that way with this person before.

I feel angry and annoyed, in part because of the disrespect.

Complicating that... I'm fighting depression and this reminds me a great deal of issues from the past.

The volunteer work is important to me, and I've been very supportive.

I went in knowing this could happen as he did this on a past project.

My goal is to get through this without losing my patience.

I've already dropped some self respect.

Here's my cure so far:

There won't be a next time. This is something I find stressful and despite awareness, it still bothers me.

I'll do it because the project matters.

Unlike last time, I said how I feel about the second sample, which I didn't finalize because of the time frame. If he insists on it, I'll perfect that and try to let go of how annoyed I feel about a volunteer peer bossing me around in my area of expertise.

I didn't cause it (his arrogance), I can't fix it, even though I would like to.

It's not as important as it feels.

It does, however, hurt.

I'm very aware of how much I judge myself because of his disrespect of my time and skills, and because of how I'm feeling.

I'm gonna get through this. The depression is complicating something simple so it feels!!! like a crisis, even though it isn't.

Reinforcement appreciated. (I do get how I contribute to the situation).

Read more about...
12 Replies
MrRigatoni profile image
MrRigatoni

Hello pleased to meet you.

Sorry to hear this as a volunteer previous history same as youn going through right now.

Understand this had the following wrote a letter to managers listing complaints procedure.

This is your free time if not happy why bother if this is effecting your mental health then leave..

I am and have been doing volunteering on and off since leaving school in the mists of time .

Right through to middle fifties not happy since many caused me grief problems.

You worth it more organisations deserve some one like you and just think it there problem not yours not worth..

Just think of opportunities out there if having depression have any support with in the organisation or need some ..

Use these three if living UK..

richmondfellowship.org

mind.org.uk

rethink.org

All offer floating support help and guidance to cope with any issues .

All are looking for volunteers work with these organisations, just a suggestion.

Please anything can help with ask.

The following words might inspire you further.

If we put a stone in our path do we go around or over or do we stop still..

in reply toMrRigatoni

Wow, thanks! That's useful and helps!

MrRigatoni profile image
MrRigatoni in reply to

Thanks reply twist it around friend turns up same as you says same things what would you be telling him..

Your better than them do you need ???

I used to do gardens create peace tranquilty and some bleep bleep took the credit for all the hard work did it all he claimed..

Me walked away why need them life is too short..

Your amazing wonderful human being fabulous breaking melting hearts where ever you go I say to my self same to you have to say that..

Life is a journey on a path carrying two suitcases of woe if they became heavy still carry them around or do you wish to travel ...

On the road of life with suitcases of happiness and joy pleasurable enjoyable aspects of your life..

We live once do something about the life you have supplied the mental health charities and do use these..

Lots of opportunities for you to heal recovery and even volunteer be with radiators not drains..

I am here if you wish to ask any questions any thing can help with...

Please take care

in reply toMrRigatoni

thanks so much

daveh121 profile image
daveh121

Maybe you could come to our house and listen to the same concerns my wife has about some of her volunteering. (Probably wait till the fires die out though. I am not sure if the roads are even open).

They are almost exact duplicates. Amazing.

The project is worthwhile, most people are good and appreciative, the annoying ones don’t count so they stay an arms distance or more away.

However, you are still affected by the annoying people.

I believe that in spite of you wanting to help you are the most important person to take care of.

If what you do brings joy then great. If you are becoming annoyed it’s something to consider going forward.

Personally, I have become guarded about extracurricular involvement since I don’t like getting frustrated by pea brained people.

I sense that you find value in doing good things for your community. So do I as long as it flows easily without conflict.

Good for you to give it a try though.

Just my two cents worth.

Beautifulrainbow profile image
Beautifulrainbow in reply todaveh121

Hello there. I think it's great that your volunteering, and you love what your doing, but if he is always judgemental about your work, then I would certainly spend your knowledge and Skills somewhere else where your be appreciated. You have to look after number one and that's yourself, because if not your health will detiorate and u don't want that to happen. I would love to do something like that but with my Depression and Anxiety someone will only have to say something to upset me and I'll be off. So we'll done you for being there. But for your own sanity leave. Best of luck. X

in reply toBeautifulrainbow

thank you! I can appreciate how you feel!

in reply todaveh121

I got through it, had a short conversation with the person that was upsetting me, and recommitted to it, reminding myself of the bigger value while promising myself to remember this. Got her done! And just signed up to do 3 days of virtual information monitoring from home for Team Rubicon. I can do this, but need to look out for me. Thank you!

daveh121 profile image
daveh121 in reply to

Perfect. I am glad it worked out!

in reply todaveh121

Hope your fires are backing down. Rain on ours, and we may get rain here tonight.

daveh121 profile image
daveh121 in reply to

Yes, rain would be welcomed. Enjoy yours.

in reply todaveh121

We got it last night. Not due for more for a while, and we had some pretty intense lightning for a bit as well. 6 weeks to the end of normal fire season.

Not what you're looking for?

You may also like...

Bad day at work

Feel like I'm only ever on here when I've had a bad day, but I do actually read everyone else's...
ccrr profile image

Anxiety, depressions little helper

Hi Guys Just a vent really. Doing better depression wise at the moment, it is the usual daily...

Seeking emotional peace

Today once again my boss at work has destroyed me. I really don't know how to deal with this. I am...

I know this is not a diagnosis site but somebody please help me step in the right direction.

So I have been diagnosed with severe depression and GAD, but recently I've been very well for a...
helena182 profile image

What a week and a big one to come!!

This last week as to have been the longest one ever!!! I am at a low at the minute anyway but it...
Kim29 profile image

Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.

Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.