Picking GOOD Friends?

[UpsideDownBrain]

My whole life I’ve been told by older adults that I’m really good at picking friends. I never understood what that meant?

I look back at myself, in the mirror and think what do I look for in a friend? Of corse I look for kindness, silliness and being honest, open communication, but everyone is capable of having those qualities, just some lack to have them all the time. I don’t really blame people who don’t have those qualities, it’s comes from a deeper problem within ones self. So no I don’t think I’m good at picking “GOOD friends” I think I’m good at wanting deeper connection with people who look to be introverted. I’m quite loud person, not on purpose but my ADHD speaks for me most of the time. People tell me I’m really easy to talk to. But then walk away when more personal stories come to the surface of the conversation. It’s funny how people value my honesty but don’t want to reciprocate it back!

It hurts.

It hurts my feelings.

I understand I can’t change that in a person but I think it’s the biggest reason to my lonely feeling.

I feel empty when my friends don’t want to tell me something. I feel lonely when my friends don’t invite me. I feel lonely when I don’t relate to others. I feel lonely when people assume my issues are my mental disorders. I feel lonely...

I find comfort in the fact that the whole world is feeling this way because of the pandemic. Before this virus, I still faced loneliness everyday.

That hits hard, what do I do when I have friends who treat me good but don’t see that some of things they say or do contribute to my lonely feeling? Or am I just being selfish?

[sweetiepye]

My experience with this is that most people find me easy to talk to . I am non judgmental and keep my own counsel . I am not as forth coming to others with my own feelings because I have been let down too many times . Not everyone is able to keep a secret . It can make your life lonely if you are afraid to share too much, but most people don't seem to notice if they're doing most of the talking . One of the reasons I'm comfortable on here is I'm anonymous .

[LilyAnnepuppy in reply to sweetiepye]

Glad to see you, Sweetiepye

[sweetiepye in reply to LilyAnnepuppy]

Like wise

[Hidden in reply to sweetiepye]

Hello Pam

How are you, have you settled ok now ?

BOB

[Hidden]

Hello

Remember you can protect yourself from a Thief although not from a liar.

A Liar, it seems that many people out there seem to Lie, That makes friendships to form a very difficult thing to do. Real friends are as rare as Hens Teeth

BOB

[sweetiepye in reply to Hidden]

So true