I am suffering from negativity

[Shilpa08]

I am thinking negative all the time I am doing comparison and getting jealous of my family like my Chacha and his daughters and I am embarrassed by my sister and my husband and also my mother I think they are not my standard and our bond is not that strong as in my Chacha family I always blame my parents and they are not that classy my Chacha family is classy and rich and they are always positive but we are negative what should I do

[Hidden]

Thinking about others can encourage you - to do something otherwise concentrating on yourself is better as you can improve yourself

[Shilpa08 in reply to Hidden]

How to improve when I am so influenced by others and I don’t accept my people

[c-mac in reply to Shilpa08]

When I write in my journal about my day and how I feel about it, I don't think about other people so much. It helps me focus on myself.

[Shilpa08 in reply to c-mac]

I focus on myself very much but I then I find myself very negative and bad

[c-mac in reply to Shilpa08]

Yeah, I do that sometimes. It helps me to think of myself as a mother taking care of baby Me. "Let's not think about those hateful things, let's think about feeling better." Sometimes those kind of thoughts are called "negative tapes", which shows how they happen automatically and always want to go in the same direction.

Gently correcting myself when I catch myself playing those negative tapes works better and better the more I practice it. "Ah, I was being negative. That's okay, it's understandable. I can worry about it later. Let's put that aside for now, and think of something positive. "

[Shilpa08]

Yeah u r right but it’s so difficult to ignore that beacuse you are surrounded by people and you feel so inferior, jealous etc and those feelings. Doesn’t go and everyone around you is happy and positive but you are not able to and you feel I am so bad I am thinking bad about someone and you try to correct it but still it comes

[Saba76 in reply to Shilpa08]

💛 I know how you feel. I compare myself to other people 24/7. I’m consumed by comparison thoughts and jealousy/envy of happy couples, friends with strong bonds, happy families and just about anyone. It’s exhausting.

I’m trying to change.

I tell myself “Comparisons aren’t useful”, and distract myself into something else, mindfully - like the pattern of a gate on the bus, when I compare myself to a girl who is thinner than me for example. Maybe you could try that, see if it helps. The advice above about treating yourself as if you were a baby also seems lovely and helpful. I’m wishing you peace, and relief from these toxic thoughts. 💛

[Shilpa08 in reply to Saba76]

Yes I try but then again I go back into the same thoughts I am actually just not happy with my marriage and it’s all so frustrating I am confused what to do feel like dying everyday

[Saba76 in reply to Shilpa08]

Yeah it’s hard have you considered talking to a therapist?

[Shilpa08 in reply to Saba76]

Yes I did and I was taking meds but that won’t change my nature or personality right my relationship with my husband is horrible

[Saba76 in reply to Shilpa08]

I’m on meds too

[Saba76]

💛 I’m sorry things are so hard for you. I hope that they can get easier. 💛

[Shilpa08 in reply to Saba76]

Can someone talk to me