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[Sadnessismyreality]

Can someone tell me why I am such a screwup? I’ve been depressed for over a year now and life is just making everything worse. I feel like the biggest disappointment to my friends and my family. I do things impulsively without thinking of the consequences and I constantly get yelled at for them and it just hurts so much.. i don’t understand why my brain won’t let me think before I do things that cause others hurt and pain. I can’t tell if it’s my adhd or I’m just mentally stupid. Either way, I feel like a screwup and a big waste of everyone’s space. My anxiety makes everything worse too. My parents won’t let me on meds because they fear addiction but I just want to have one day where I wake up happy and go to bed happy. But I guess that’s too much to ask for. I get yelled at when I ask for help so I’ve stopped asking. When I’m sad and crying, I stay to myself so I don’t bother anyone with my problems. Sometimes I wonder if my life is even worth it and tonite is one of those nights. I’m in bed crying because I made a mistake without thinking and my parents just yelled and yelled and made me feel like complete garbage. If I can’t even please my parents then why even try anymore. I’m so sad. I just need someone who actually understands and won’t ridicule me for how I am and what is actually going on in my head.. please help. I’m scared that I’m too far gone

[MAS_Nurse]

Hi there,

Welcome to our community. You are obviously going through a difficult time at the moment and it sounds like you need professional medical advice and support. However, this forum may not be appropriate for you and I hope you don't mind my asking this, but what age are you, are you under 16 years old, because you mention that your parents won't let you take medication for your MH problems? The reason I ask this is that no one under 16 years is allowed to join Health Unlocked and we would need to redirect you to age-appropriate support resources (see Section 2 -healthunlocked.com/policies.... If you are over 16 years, then I question why your parents can prevent you from being medically treated? I suggest that you speak to your doctor about your needs and ask for professional medical help. He/she can refer you to your local MH services to access psychological therapies with or without medication. As you have not indicated which part of the world you live in it is hard to redirect you to MH crisis support helplines in your country. If you live in the UK here is a link to some in our country:support.healthunlocked.com/...

Do keep in touch and let us know how you are doing.

Best wishes,

MAS Nurse and Moderator

[Sadnessismyreality in reply to MAS_Nurse]

I’m 20 and I’m in college. I currently live with my parents since we moved and I have to get more money so I can move out. They won’t let me on meds bc my dads dad was an addict and he thinks I’m gonna be the same way so he refuses treatment. Trust me I’d take pills if I had to opportunity to

[MAS_Nurse in reply to Sadnessismyreality]

Hi,

You are an adult and no one can dictate to you what you can or cannot do! You need to do what is best for your health. I can understand your parents' fears, but you are you, you are no longer a child, and if you explain these things to your doctor, they should help and monitor you to help you self-manage your medications and conditions safely.

MAS Nurse and Moderator