Newcomer here - I have everything, but I feel empty?

[Golfer1995]

Why do I feel the way I do? I have a great family, and parents who support me and care for me. I have a beautiful girlfriend who I love and cherish. I have been awarded a scholarship which pays for my PhD. But I am always on edge, I am always overthinking. I feel like I can't talk to anyone about my problems, because I don't want to let them in and I also don't want them to worry about me. I don't know how to make myself happy, and I don't know if I am making the right decisions for me.

[kenster1]

hi sorry to hear of your troubles.i pretty much guarantee all of us on here thought the same as you in the beginning.people we love and who love us are supposed to be worried its part of us as family/friends.if you feel like you need support then please talk it really will help.

[Lindsey14]

I really get how ya feel. I wonder that myself. I have a good life so why am i like this? Sadly anxiety doesn't care. Good life or not anyone can have anxiety

[hypercat54]

It's very common in life to have to make decisions without knowing all the facts, but it's rarely a catastrophe if you get it wrong. We all make mistakes coz we are human.

For example my nephew went to Uni to study English, but changed after a few months to something else. Not a problem. x

[MAS_Nurse]

Hi Golfer1995,

Welcome to our very supportive community. As you have begun to see folks here are very willing to come alongside each other and share from their wealth of knowledge and experience. You are obviously going through a difficult time at the moment, and in the first instance, I would encourage you to make a double appointment to go and see your GP. Tell him/her how you are feeling, they can refer you on to your local mental health team if necessary, as there are a range of therapies available to help you from medication through to different forms of talking therapy, mindfulness, etc. Just jot down briefly what you’ve been struggling with, your thoughts and feelings and how this affects your daily life, energy levels, studies and relationships etc.

In the UK there’s been a massive awareness campaign throughout all the universities to raise the issues of mental health among students and staff, no one is immune to experiencing MH problems and research shows the stats are between 1:3 -1:4. The Equality Act, 2010 UK mental health problems are recognised disabilities, and your rights are protected. Are you aware that even as a post-grad student you are entitled to the Government Disabled Student Allowance fund, which can provide specialist MH mentors and other support? DSA: gov.uk/disabled-students-al...

It has also been flagged a lot in the media over recent years, not only the need for more support for students with MH problems in universities, but also, the need to break the silence in uni staff and offer them more MH support. You are not alone in keeping your problems quiet. The increased stress as you go up the academic ladder for post-grad students has been underestimated. I will include a couple of links to news articles, as well as links to MH organisations that can offer you more support and information. Don't keep silent, it will only make things worse for you. You need to speak to someone who can help.

Each year there is a national University Mental Health Day UK supported by all the universities. Check out what yours is doing and find out what support there is for you: unimentalhealthday.co.uk/

University Mental Health Advisors Network (UMHAN)umhan.com/

Example: #ichosetodisclose: umhan.com/stories/5-ichoset...

The Conversation (News article) theconversation.com/more-ac...

The Guardian - Mental health crisis in universities: theguardian.com/education/s...

Student Minds: studentminds.org.uk/

Students against depression: studentsagainstdepression.org/

Heads Together: headstogether.org.uk/get-su...

Mind UK – Student Life: mind.org.uk/information-sup...

Nightline:nightline.ac.uk/

UK Crisis support helplines:

The Samaritans Tel: 116 123 [24 hours line]

NHS: 999 [Emergencies]

NHS 111 [Non-Emergencies]

MIND UK charity: Helpline Tel: [phone]

SANEline Tel: [phone] [4.30pm – 10.30pm daily ] sane.org.uk/

I hope this gives you some food for thought and the support you need.

Do keep in touch and let us know how you are getting along.

Best wishes,

MAS Nurse and Moderator

[Dessertmouse58]

Life can be too too perfect.. at times when I feel like nothing extraordinary is going on, l seek to help someone of the troubles they are going through.. yes I know one or two individuals who’s lives are sometimes a roller coaster, but because I’m so even keel and rational, I seek to help others. You may also challenge yourself to learn a new physical activity, hiking, running, boating, fishing, skiing, scuba diving, challenges and struggles can sometimes give us happiness.,take acting classes, cooking classes etc.,go outside the box and do things that are unpredictable., are you a super nice person who’s always understanding? Well if you are, you re putting too much pressure on yourself to be perfect. Be real, be honest, reaction in an honest manner is healthy.

[Dessertmouse58]

We all like to give the impression nothing is bothering us.. I’m guilty of that. But being honest to who you are is healthy., that means facing facts about what bothers you about situations and others. Life goes on if you express your true feelings.